


Whatever We Did We're Glad We Did

by Kimberly2704



Category: Jugenea
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-14
Updated: 2021-02-03
Packaged: 2021-03-10 17:06:59
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 64,511
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28060635
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kimberly2704/pseuds/Kimberly2704
Kudos: 4





	1. Chapter 1

June 1947

Judy awoke to the light peaking through the curtains and stretched herself as she turned to the other side. She hadn’t slept this good in a long time. She snuggled deeper into the soft covers and smiled but then she remembered - there was an earlier call time today than usual, she must have overslept.

“Damn!”

In a hurry she scurried out of the bed and picked up her dressing gown she had thrown over the chair the night before. She didn’t understand why Vincente hadn’t woken her up. By the time she got downstairs she heard noises coming from the kitchen. Vincente was sitting at the table, trying to give Liza some food who seemed to be more interested in playing with a spoon that was lying on the table in front of her. When she saw her mother coming into the kitchen she reached out her hands and let out a squeal. Judy smiled and took her out of Vincente’s arms as he handed her to him, covering her daughter’s cheek with kisses before she turned to her husband.

“Why didn’t you wake me up? I thought we had an early call today?”

“Yes we did, but there was a change of plans.”

Judy sat down at the table and placed Liza on her lap.

“What do you mean?”

“Kelly’s sick.”

“What?”

“Yeah he said he wouldn’t be there the whole week.”

“Come on, he’s never sick. That man is a workaholic.”

“Well, that’s everything that I know. Maybe it’s a good thing … I know how hard it has been for you, coming back to work and everything. Don’t you think it will be nice having a few days to yourself?”

Liza was starting to get fussy and Judy stood up and placed her in her playpen where she immediately darted for her dolls.

“Well, yeah I guess so.” She said, still a little flustered as she turned back to him.

“See.” He said with a smile on his face as he stood up and placed his plate in the sink, before he turned to her and kissed her.

“I still have to go but I won’t be too long.”

“What, why?”

“It’s a good opportunity to prepare for the rest of the scenes we still need to shoot. I want everything to be perfect.”

She had to admit she wasn’t surprised. When she didn’t respond anything he just said,

“See you later okay?”

She nodded a little disappointed and sat back down at the table watching her daughter play as she heard him gathering his things in the hallway and heading for the door.  
After he left Judy paced around the kitchen. She didn’t know what to do with herself and most of all she wondered what was up with Gene - she didn’t buy his story, it just wasn’t like him.

“What do you say Liza, should we call him?” Liza just looked at her Mama with her big dark eyes and waved one of her teddies at her.

“I’m gonna take that as a yes.”

Judy moved to the phone and dialed Gene’s number eagerly.

“Kelly residence?” Called Betsy’s voice. Damn, Judy thought, that was the last thing I needed today. She tried to sound as nonchalant as she could when she answered.

“Good morning Betsy, it’s Judy.”

“Hi Judy, how are you? Everything okay?”

“Yeah everything’s fine, listen, I was just wondering … is Gene in?”

“Yes, of course.”

“Could I talk to him for a moment?”

Judy could hear her hesitating a moment before she answered. “I think he’s still in the shower, can I take a message?” The tone in her voice told her it wasn’t the truth but Judy played along.

“I just wanted to know if he’s okay, since he called in sick for the week. He’s never done this before.”

When Judy didn’t hear anything for a while she asked,

“Betsy? Are you still there?”

“Yes, Yes it’s nothing serious, don’t worry about it. I have to go now, Kerry wants something.”

And with that she hung up the phone.  
______________

Gene had been in the kitchen when he heard Betsy talking on the phone but by the time he had reached the living room she had already hung up.

“Who was that?”

“Judy.” She plainly stated with a displeased look on her face.

“Why didn’t you give me the phone?” But she ignored his question.

“Why did you call in sick?”

“Betsy I -”

“How come you don’t tell me things like this anymore … Why Gene? Why?”

Betsy could see he was getting annoyed but she wouldn’t let him get away with this one.

“Judy needed some time off, okay? It was too much. I could see it.”

“If she needed it, she could have taken it herself. Why do you have this constant need to save her?” He took a deep breath in before he answered.

“You know she wouldn’t do that, she already has all this pressure on her.”

Betsy waited a while before she came closer, her face was directly in front of his, “Well, it’s good that you stepped up for her then.”

“I’m her friend.” Gene said and threw his arms to the side in defense.

“If you say so.” She said and wanted to walk off, but Gene held her back.

“What’s that supposed to mean now?”

“Leave me alone. If you can’t realize it yourself I don’t even see the point in talking to you anymore.”

“God dammit, will you just tell me what is bothering you so much?!”

“Whenever she’s in the picture you’re different. You’re happier, your sadder - everything just becomes more intense. She hits you in a whole nother way and I think it might be time you admitted it to yourself. She’s far more than a friend to you and you know it … And I’m sick and tired of it. Oh, how I wish you could look at yourself when she’s around. And how she’s touching you and … argh - it makes me want to scream!”

“You’re blowing this way out of proportion.”

A bitter laugh escaped her mouth. “Oh, don’t fool me Gene.” She went to go upstairs.

“Where are you going? We are not done talking!” He went after her and tried taking her hand to hold her back but she dragged it away from him.

“Well, too bad, I am. I’m taking Kerry to the beach. I can’t stand being around you today.”

Gene sighed in frustration and let himself fall on the couch. He knew that he wasn’t seeing clearly when it came to Judy but being called out like that took him off guard. He couldn’t admit to his wife that he had feelings for Judy. He wouldn’t let this whole facade that he had built up all these years crumble just like that. His thoughts were interrupted by an excited Kerry who came running into the living room. When she reached him she jumped up on the couch next to him and tugged on his arm.

“Daddy, Daddy we’re going to the beach!”

“Yes I know honey.” He pulled his daughter close and kissed her cheek.

Just then Betsy walked into the room, a beach bag thrown over her arm.

“Say bye bye to Daddy, Kerry.”

“But I want him to come with us.”

“Some other time okay? Daddy isn’t feeling so well.” Betsy said, smiling cynically at Gene before she reached out to take Kerry’s hand.

“I promise I’ll make up for it, okay? Now you go have fun today.” Gene stood up, kneeled next to Kerry and kissed her. They were just about to make their way out when Kerry said,

“What about Mommy?”

They didn’t want their child to notice the tension between them so Gene quickly walked up to them and gave his wife a quick kiss on the lips. It made Betsy tense and after she stood there for a little while not knowing how to behave she took Kerry’s hand and went out of the door. He heard them leave and walked upstairs to take a shower in hopes that the water might wash away his troubles. It didn’t work. He only thought more about his wife and about Judy. If he was honest with himself he knew that the love he had for his wife had faded a long time ago and it only faded more and more as the years went by. When he was away in Washington he didn’t really notice it because he really missed his family but as soon as he returned he knew that things had changed. Betsy was glad when he came back home and their family was together again and there was still love between them but they were not in love anymore and the heat was definitely gone. When work on The Pirate started and he spent more time with Judy again it gave him a taste of what might have been had he succumbed to the temptation of being with her all those years ago when she initiated it and he blocked her off. Of course, relationships were always more exciting in the beginning - the longing and passion wore off after a while with most people but he couldn’t help but think that it would be different with Judy. She was someone who fascinated him beyond believe. And not only physical. Of course she was beautiful, even though she sometimes had trouble seeing it herself, but beyond that her mind fascinated him above all else. They never had trouble finding something to talk about. She was intelligent and witty and could make him laugh like nobody else. She just had it all. But being great friends was as far as he would and could go with her and he intended on keeping it that way.

When Gene got out of the shower and got dressed he walked back to the living room and reached for the phone as he remembered Judy’s call. It felt wrong that he didn’t even get the chance to speak to her.

“Minnelli?” The moment he heard her voice, his mood lifted instantly.

“Hey…”

“Gene! So, were you allowed to talk to me now?” She teased.

“Yeah, sorry about before.”

“Don’t worry about it. I just wanted to know if you’re okay … You’re not really sick, are you?”

“Well, no, I … I just thought you could use these few days. I know how hard you’ve worked these past couple of months and I know it has not been easy for you coming back to work and everything.”

“Usually I don’t like it when people decide things over my head but in this case I must admit I really appreciate it.

“I didn’t want to decide anything for you, I just -”, but she cut him off.

“Gene, like I said, it’s fine. I truly appreciate it.” She knew him so well that she could hear him smile into the phone and she had to smile as well.

“I hope you’ll get some rest.”

“Yeah I think so. I was hoping to spend some time with Liza and Vincente together but he’s gone to work nevertheless … Said something about preparing for other scenes. But anyway, what’s up with you? Did you have a nice -”, there was a shattering noise followed by Liza starting to cry.

“Oh dammit, Gene, I have to call you back.”

_____________

Judy ran into the living room and saw that Liza had managed to throw down the water pitcher when she pulled on the table cloth that covered the small coffee table. She and everything else around her was now covered in water. Luckily the glass didn’t shatter.

“Oh darling what are you doing?”

Judy gathered her baby up in her arms who was still sobbing desperately. She tried soothing her and kissed her while stroking her back.

“It’s okay baby, that’s just water. Come we’ll get you out of your wet clothes.” She said as she went upstairs to Liza’s room. By the time Judy got a clean dress on her she was already laughing again while Judy made silly jokes with her. Just then she heard the doorbell from downstairs. She sighed, it didn’t seem like it would be a relaxed day - she didn’t even have the time to get dressed properly yet.

“Shall we see who’s at the door?” Judy opened her arms and lifted Liza from the changing table.

“I’m coming!” She sang as she hurried down the stairs.

She let out a surprised laugh when she opened the door and saw Gene standing there.

“I would have called you back, you know?” She said with a twinkle in her eye.

“I know, but it sounded stressful and I didn’t want us to get interrupted again.”

They stared at each other for a little while.

“But if you’d rather be alone right now I completely understand.”

Only then she realized she hadn’t even invited him inside yet. “Oh, don’t be silly, please come in.”

When they were standing in the hallway Gene leaned in and kissed her hello.

“It’s good to see her happy again”, he said as he stroked Liza’s cheek while she gave him her best smile, “she sounded upset.”

“Yeah, she’s been keeping me busy. She decided to soak herself and the living room floor. This place is still a mess. And I didn’t even have a chance to get dressed yet and it’s already what?” She looked around the corner at the clock.

“Oh my God it’s already noon.”

Without saying a word Gene reached out and took Liza from her arms.

“What are you doing?”

“I’ll take care of her. You go get ready and take your time, take a bath, relax.”

“But -”

“No, don’t worry, we’ll be fine.”

Judy hesitated a little before she gave in. “Okay … well, her playpen is in the kitchen and there are more toys in her room and if she -”

“Judy”, he stopped her, “I’ve done this before. Take as much time as you need.”

“Alright.” She leaned in and kissed first her daughter and then him on the cheek.

“Thank you.” She smiled at him and turned to go upstairs.

Judy let out a satisfied sigh when she let herself sink into the hot bubble bath. This was exactly what she needed. Gene was such an angel. It was like he always knew what to do when it came to her. Sometimes even before she knew she needed it. She was aware how tough he could be with others from time to time, but never with her and she liked how special it made her feel. A smile edged on her lips and she sank down further into the hot water. She was so lucky to have him.

Afterwards Judy got dressed and put a little makeup on before she went back down. She didn’t hear a thing and thought they might have gone outside but when she got to the living room and saw them together she thought her heart was about to burst. Gene had sunk back deep into the couch and Liza was sitting on his lap, her face leaning against his chest. He had put a blanket over her and had his arms placed around her small body. Judy silently moved closer, trying not to startle them and Gene looked up as he noticed her.

“I think this morning has been quite stressful for her too.” He smiled.

Judy placed her hand on his shoulder and asked, “Shall I get her upstairs?”

“Let me do it, maybe she won’t wake up this way.”

Liza stirred a little as he got up with her but Gene managed to soothe her before he went upstairs.

When Gene came back he found Judy in the kitchen.

“Everything okay with Liza?”

“Yes, she didn’t wake up.”

“Good. Would you like some coffee?”

“Sure.”

They sat down on the high barstools in front of the kitchen counter after Judy had placed two cups of hot coffee in front of them. Gene didn’t say anything at first and kept staring at her and it made her a little nervous.

“What?”

“You look beautiful.” He plainly stated.

She could feel her cheeks blush a little and she took a sip from her coffee to hide it. “Gene?”

“Yes?”

“Betsy sounded kinda upset on the phone … I hope I didn’t cause you any trouble.”

“Don’t worry about it.”

“But I did, didn’t I?”

Gene just waved it off and took a big gulp from his coffee.

“Does she know you called in sick because of me?”

“Well, no she didn’t know when you called but she does now.”

Judy looked at him with worry in her eyes.

“What happened?”

“I hadn’t told her I called in sick at all. After you called I told her that I did it to help you …”

“And?”

“She got a little mad … she took Kerry to the beach for the day. Said she didn’t want to be around me today.”

“Oh no.” Judy put her hands over her face and placed her elbows on the counter.

“I hope she doesn’t think that we …”, she made a gesture with her hands and looked at him, “well, you know.”

Gene took a while to answer her. “She thinks you’re more than a friend to me.” There was no point in beating around the bush anymore.

“I, I don’t know what to say.”

“You don’t have to say anything, we both know what we are, that should be enough.”

“But what would she say if she knew you’re sitting here right now?”

“Judy that’s ridiculous, I’m allowed to sit here with you. We’re working together, we are friends - she was just overreacting.”

“Trust me, it wouldn’t make her happier if she knew. She expects you to sit at home now in remorse, not sitting together with the woman she accused you of having feelings for, drinking coffee.”

He sighed and rubbed his eyes. “Perhaps you’re right … I should go, shouldn’t I?”

“Well, I don’t want you to leave but yes, probably.”

He drank the last bit of his coffee before he got off the stool. Suddenly she hated seeing him leave. Why did she have to say all these things? She knew that it was the right thing to do but nevertheless she hated the outcome. She loved having him around. From just sitting next to each other while studying their lines together to laughing until they couldn’t breath in between rehearsals - everything was fun with him. And she didn’t let him know it but she understood why Betsy had these thoughts. There had definitely been moments when Judy could feel the sexual tension between them. Heck, she only had to think of the many rehearsals they did for their Voodoo number and her body was tingling all over. Of course, they were only acting then but her body certainly didn’t seem to think so. When he would lift her and she could feel the strength of his arms around her body she wanted to do unspeakable things to him and the way he would kiss her went beyond anything she ever experienced with other partners. He usually turned away a little from the camera and would nudge her lips open with his and more often than not she could feel his tongue lightly caressing hers. Afterwards she could see the inner turmoil in his eyes. They never spoke about it but she could see it anyways. Of course, Betsy was not around when this happened - thank God! - but Judy could only imagine the way they came across to her at social gatherings and such. They couldn’t deny the spark they had between them.  
They were standing in the hallway now. She couldn’t explain the sudden urge to ask it, she knew it was wrong of her and it went against everything she told him just a few minutes ago but she just couldn’t resist.

“Gene?”

“Judy?” He asked back with a grin.

“Is it true, though?”

“What do you mean?”

She almost whispered now. “Am I more than a friend to you?”

Judy could see the colour disappearing from his face as he reached up and nervously ran a hand through his hair.

“What?”

“You heard me.”

“You’re asking me this after you practically told me to go back home to patch things up with my wife again?”

Judy took a step in and looked up at him.

“Am I?”

“I have to go.” He leaned in and kissed her forehead and without another word he opened the door and left.

But when he started walking down towards his car he couldn’t get the image of her imploring eyes staring up at him out of his head. She looked so beautiful, he just wanted to kiss her in that moment. Of course she was more to him than a friend.  
His feet seemed to make the decision for him when he suddenly stopped and turned around, practically running to the door again.  
Judy was sitting on the stairs when he opened it and looked at him in confusion.

“Did you forget something?” She asked him as she stood up.

He walked towards her very slowly. “Yes.” His face was now just a few inches away from hers. He didn’t touch her but the sensation of feeling his breath against her lips sent tingles throughout her entire body.

“You are so much more to me Judy.” He whispered as he looked her in the eyes. She could see the sadness in them and it broke her heart. She didn’t know what to answer him, she couldn’t even move.

She could feel him getting nervous when she didn’t react. “Well, I guess I should … ” He pointed towards the door indicating that he wanted to leave but she held him back before he had the chance to. She put her arms around his neck and could hear his breathing become heavier when he asked her,

“What are you doing?”

“I think I forgot something, too.” She whispered before she placed her lips upon his. She could feel him tense a bit but when he slowly opened his lips against hers and groaned a little into her mouth she knew that he was as far gone as she was. His hands wandered around her waist as she deepened their kiss. 

“This is crazy, we shouldn’t be doing this.” he muttered in between kisses.

“Then stop me”, she answered as she trailed kisses along his jawline. When she reached his mouth again he only moaned and devoured her in a hungry kiss, pressing his tongue inside her almost desperately as she felt his hands sliding down her back until they reached her thighs. He picked her up and without leaving her mouth placed her on top of the small shelf in the hallway. She let out a small giggle and placed her legs around his hips allowing him to step further into her. She was almost giddy with desire when she felt him against her and drew back a little to suck on his lower lip. She couldn’t believe that she had him, she had wanted this for so long but told herself that it wouldn’t happen and here they were.

Gene didn’t know how long they kissed; he just knew that he didn’t want to spend even one second away from her mouth. Her lips felt heavenly against his and she tasted so sweet. She fitted into his arms perfectly and the way she clung to him only made him fall for her more. Everything his wife accused him of was true and he knew it. He also knew that he needed to stop this but he couldn’t. The small whimpers that escaped her mouth as he caressed her tongue with his and the way she would buckle her hips against him as she held onto him with her legs made him lose his mind. She was his in that moment and he wished he could keep it this way.

It was only when Judy heard Liza crying from upstairs that she got back to reality. She sighed as she broke off the kiss and placed her hands on his chest. He looked at her understandingly and let her down. She went upstairs quickly and he leaned against the wall and closed his eyes. He still couldn’t quite believe what they had done. He could still feel her against him and it made him grin uncontrollably. It surprised him a little but he didn’t feel as much remorse as he thought he would.

After a couple of minutes Judy returned with Liza in her arms.

“This is probably a good time to leave.” He said when she was standing in front of him.

“Alright.” She couldn’t hide her smirk when she continued, “I’m glad you came back though.”

“Me too.” He smiled. Leaning in he planned to only kiss her cheek but she was quicker and let her full lips fall onto his one more time, giving him a soft kiss.

“Judy I -”

“Don’t worry about it Gene, we’ll talk about everything when we see each other again.”

“Okay.” He went to leave but turned around again. It didn’t feel right leaving her without saying anything about what had just happened between them.

“Just know that I don’t regret it. Alright?”

“Me neither.”

The way he looked at her when he left made Judy feel all fuzzy and warm inside and she hummed contently as she entered the kitchen to prepare some food for Liza and herself. She had to giggle when she looked down and saw that he had managed to unbutton a few of the buttons on her dress. She looked over at Liza sitting in her playpen and sighed,

“What a day, huh baby?”

____________________

“Judy?”

Nothing.

“Judyyy!”

“WHAT!?” She yelled back.

“We’re gonna be late!”

“Just give me ten more minutes, will you?”

Judy was in her closet having a full on crisis because she couldn’t decide on what to wear. Vincente and her were to meet Gene and Betsy for drinks at Ciro’s and she had been a nervous wreck ever since Vincente had told her about it. She wanted to tell him that they couldn’t go, but what was she going to say? That they couldn’t meet them because she and Gene made out while he was at work and it might make for an awkward atmosphere? She didn’t think so. Argh, everything was such a mess!  
She climbed across the mayhem of clothes that she had piled on the floor in her search for the perfect dress when she finally found something that she was pleased with. Whether she liked it or not she had to admit that she wanted to look her absolute best for him. She wanted to make an impression. She wanted his jaw to drop to the floor when he saw her and most of all she wanted him to want her.  
Judy pulled the dress over her head in a hurry, pulled the straps on her shoulder in place and looked at herself in the mirror. The tightly fitted bodice was a soft cream colour and the black flared out skirt swung as she swayed a little to the song that was stuck in her head. The neckline was quite modest but there was a generous cutout at the back that ended just above her waist. She put on a black pair of strappy heels and grabbed her handbag before she placed her wrap around her arms and reapplied some ruby-red lipstick.

“Yup, that will do.” Judy said to herself as she checked her outfit in the mirror one last time before she headed downstairs.

Vincente was already waiting at the door when she came down.

“All done.”

He looked at her in wonder. “It was worth the wait, you look beautiful darling.” He said before he leaned in and kissed her. He held out his arm to her and she took it as he guided her to the cab.

_________

“Gene, I really don’t know why you’re forcing me to come along.” Betsy shouted from their room as Gene waited for her in the hallway.

“I’m not forcing you, I would just like to have you there with me.”

“Oh, I’m not so sure about that.”

“Will you cut it out?! Vincente invited us and we’ll have a nice evening together.”

“Alright, alright.” She said in defeat as she stamped down the stairs. She wore a black pencil dress with a wide neckline and her hair fanned out over her shoulders.

“You look beautiful darling.” He said as he took her hand in his and pulled her to him to give her a kiss. She smiled up at him and tugged on his hand.

“Come on then, before I change my mind.”

When they were in the cab Gene’s mind drifted off. He hoped everything would work out okay. Of course he hadn’t told Betsy anything about his encounter with Judy and he hoped that it wouldn’t be obvious that something had been going on between them. He had managed to soothe her again after she came back that day and they made up but Gene sensed that it wouldn’t take much for her jealousy to boil over again. And he couldn’t blame her, he had fucked up more than she suspected. And although he tried not to, he still thought about his kiss with Judy way too much, it had just been too good.

They were already seated at a small round table and had ordered their drinks but after 15 minutes Vincente and Judy still hadn’t arrived. Betsy was starting to become annoyed and played with the stem of her wine glass.

“She’s late again.” She murmured in an annoyed voice.

He wanted to retort something to defend Judy but held back at the last minute.

“I’m sure they’ll be here soon. And in the meantime I’m happy to spend some more time with my wife alone.” He said trying to brighten the mood before kissing her one more time.

___________________

When they entered Ciro’s Judy only became more and more nervous but she gave her best to cover it up. They were quite late and Gene and Betsy were already sitting at their table. Her heart fluttered when she saw him, he looked so handsome in his suit - she could tell he’d made an effort as well. Gene leapt up from his chair as soon as he saw them and Judy tried to keep a straight face. He shook hands with Vincente and Judy turned to Betsy sensing the coldness she emitted when they greeted each other with a kiss on the cheek, she clearly didn’t want to be there. 

“Did you have a good week?” She asked her politely.

“Oh yes, it was nice to spend some time with Liza and wind down.” Judy tried to give her her best smile before she turned to Gene.

“Hi darling.” She cooed as she leaned in and kissed him on the cheek, placing one arm around his neck. She could feel Gene’s warm hand on her back, touching her bare skin and a shiver ran down her spine.

Gene was surprised but the evening went quite well. Their conversation was in full swing, sharing fun stories about work, their children, talking about their future plans and just having a nice time. They also discussed the picture and what work still needed to be done. There really wasn’t much left to shoot besides the “Be A Clown” number he was to do with Judy and a few retakes.  
Gene tried to hide it as best as he could but he just couldn’t take his eyes off Judy and kept glancing at her every once in a while. She looked gorgeous. He had to smile to himself when they greeted each other and his hands felt the bare skin on her back. He knew that she had planned this. The drinks kept coming and although he usually didn’t do it he went along when Betsy persuaded him to dance with her, plus he didn’t want to ruin the good mood she was in. He could feel Judy’s eyes glaring at him when he took Betsy’s hand, guiding her to the dancefloor. Judy impatiently turned to Vincente.

“Will you dance with me?” She asked him.

“I don’t know darling, I don’t really feel like it.” 

“Come on.” She tugged on his arm.

“Maybe later alright?” He bent over to kiss her. “Will you excuse me for a moment? I’ll be right back.”

Disappointed Judy let herself sink back into the bench and let her mind wander. She felt like an idiot sitting there all alone. She even felt ridiculous now for worrying so much about what to wear - it certainly didn’t have the effect on Gene she hoped it would. He had only glanced at her a couple of times and tried to keep his distance, she could tell. And although it thrilled her, being in love with someone you couldn’t be together with turned out to be exhausting.  
Suddenly she felt a hand on her shoulder and Gene sat down next to her on the bench, brushing her leg with his. Judy looked around.

“Where did you leave your wife?”

“She ran into someone. What about your husband?”

“I don’t know, he left me here. Said he would be right back, that was a couple of minutes ago.” She said pouting.

Gene held his hand out to her and she looked at him in confusion.

“Will you do me the honour?”

“What will your wife think?”

But he ignored her question. “Please.”

Gene stared at her with soft warm eyes and she felt her hand moving on its own when she laid it in his. He pulled her along until they were standing in the middle of the dancefloor and took her in his arms. They began swaying to the slow music and she could feel his hand on her back.

“Hi babe.” She whispered gazing up at him with a wicked grin.

Gene snickered and placed his cheek against her temple. Judy took a deep breath in, he smelled so good. She could feel his voice vibrating against her skin as he spoke.

“I love your dress.” He murmured in her ear while his thumb lightly caressed her skin.

“Good.” She simply stated while pressing closer against his body as unnoticeably as she possibly could. She could hear him suck in his breath as he moved his arm around her a little further, his hand as low on her back as he allowed himself.

They stayed quiet the rest of the dance and just enjoyed feeling the other close. Judy tried to savor every little sensation she noticed; How the skin on his neck was covered in goosebumps as he felt her breath against it; how his fingers kept playing over her back very softly; the way his lips lingered against her skin. And she knew she would never fit into anyone's arms the way she fit in his.

When the song ended Gene stepped back carefully, not letting go of her hand and looked deeply into her eyes before he led her back to their table. Vincente was back already.

“Did you get your dance?” He asked, smiling at her when she sat back down.

“Yes, yes I did.”

“Thank you for humoring my wife Gene, I wasn’t feeling like dancing tonight.”

Gene swallowed and stammered, “Yeah, of course.”

A few seconds later Betsy returned to the table and let herself fall on the chair, pulling it a little closer to Gene and linking arms with his.

“Everything alright?” Gene asked her.

“Yeah, it was good to catch up. I had another drink with them.” She placed a hand on his cheek and Gene was a little surprised when she leaned in and kissed him, a little too passionately for Judy’s taste. An unsettling feeling spread through her body and it hurt her more than she allowed herself to admit seeing them together in this way but she couldn’t keep her eyes off of them either. She was brought back to reality when she heard Vincente’s voice next to her.

“Judy?”

“Y-Yes?” She faced him reluctantly.

“Are you alright? You seemed to be somewhere else.”

“Oh, I guess I’m just tired. Would it be okay if we head home soon?”

“Sure, I have to admit I feel quite tired myself.”

After Vincente announced that they wanted to leave, Judy only had to take a look into Gene’s eyes to see that he knew the real reason behind it. He felt bad about it and he knew then that things were starting to become far more complicated than he wanted them to. The kiss they had shared only contributed to unleashing those feelings in him that he had tried to avoid. He neither wanted to hurt his wife nor Judy but seeing her like this broke his heart a little bit. Him and Betsy decided to join them and call it a night. On their way outside Judy excused herself to go to the lady’s room. She needed a moment alone to gather herself. After she got out of the bathroom stall she walked over to the sinks. She only noticed Betsy standing next to her when she looked at herself in the mirror.

“Oh, sorry I didn’t see you there.”

There was a moment of silence before Betsy spoke.

“Did you have fun dancing with my husband?” Judy could hear the sadness in her voice mixed with a tinge of anger.

“Vincente didn’t feel like it. Gene was so kind and offered to dance with me when he came back.” She tried to explain to her.

“You should have seen yourselves.” Betsy said bitterly.

“What do you mean?” Judy asked innocently.

“You know exactly what I mean. You couldn’t have fitted a sheet of paper in between the two of you if you tried.”

“Betsy”, Judy tried to keep her voice calm, “there’s nothing going on between us. We’re just friends.” Judy felt bad about lying to her but what was she supposed to say?

“If only that were true … I have eyes you know.”

She didn’t say another word and left the lady’s room, leaving Judy standing there. They bade each other a good night outside. Gene could tell that something was off when she only gave him a quick hug but he didn’t say anything. They would talk about everything on Monday.

____________

Their call time had been 12 pm for the day but Judy was there early. She needed some time alone. Sunday had gone by in a blur as Betsy’s words kept creeping up in her head again and again. Judy knew that she was responsible for it all, after all she was the one who initiated the kiss. She didn’t want to cause any more trouble and felt like she had to take a step back but at the same time she only had to remember his hands on her when they danced or the sound he made as he kissed her and it was enough to make her gasp. The tears welled up again in her eyes. She knew her feelings for him had only deepened and she was not sure how to stop them. Judy was sitting in front of her vanity, clad only in her dressing gown and stared at herself in the mirror, trying to figure out what she should tell Gene when they would talk. All of the sudden she heard a knock on the door. Judy quickly checked her face and wiped a few tears away.

“Come in.”

Gene’s head peaked through the door.

“Do you have time?”

“Yes.”

He walked in and sat opposite her on her daybed as she turned her chair around to face him.

“I saw you get here. What made you come so early?”

“Nothing special, I just wanted to go through a few things before rehearsals.” Gene noticed she tried to avoid his eyes as she spoke and he didn’t like it.

“Is everything okay?”

Judy looked at him and tried to keep her face under control.

“Look Gene, we said we were going to talk, so let’s just do that, alright?” The tone in her voice alarmed him but he wasn’t going to argue with her.

“I think that kiss had been long overdue.” He bluntly stated after a moment of silence.

“I’ll say.” She said after she’d let out an almost bitter laugh.

“No, really Judy. I’ve wanted to kiss you like that for a long time.”

“Nevertheless, it was a mistake.”

“What makes you say that?”

“I shouldn’t have done it. I didn’t want to make things more complicated for you.”

“If you wouldn’t have kissed me, I would have. That’s why I came back in the first place.”

“Really?” She asked as her eyes met his again.

Gene looked at her and nodded.

“It doesn’t make any difference Gene, it can’t go beyond that.”

He took a while before he said something again.

“What did Betsy say to you when you two were in the lady’s room together?”

“Did she tell you about it?”

“No, she didn’t talk about the evening but I could see it in your eyes. Something happened in there.”

“She saw us on the dancefloor together.” 

“I figured it was something like that.”

“She was quite upset about it. It made me think. I don’t want to be responsible for ruining anything.”

“You wouldn’t. Things between us haven’t been the same for a long time now. We still get along most of the time but if I’m honest the main reason for me for keeping this marriage alive is Kerry.”

“And so it should be.” She said as she gave him a sad smile.

“But I want you to know something Judy. That kiss meant everything to me. You mean so much more to me than you’ll ever know. You were my first friend here, you made everything so easy for me. You make me laugh. I just have to be around you and I’m happy instantly.”

Suddenly she felt herself get all choked up again.

“Oh, you.” She said, chuckling a bit as she tried to wipe her tears away quickly.

He stood up and took her hand to pull her up with him. He enveloped her in his arms and she let him. Resting her head in the crook of his neck.

“And you looked damn hot in that dress.” Judy laughed and looked up at him, placing her hands around his neck.

“I was hoping you’d think so. I loved dancing with you like that.”

“Like how?”

“So close.” She said and she felt him move closer into her. That tingling feeling started to course through her again.

“Like this?” He asked. Judy could only nod. She closed her eyes and she looked so beautiful to him with her mouth half open that he couldn’t resist. He brushed his lips over her full lips and kissed her softly.

“Gene, we -”, but he silenced her with another kiss, deeper this time.

“What else?” He asked, ignoring her attempt to save the situation.

“Your fingers on my back.” She breathed huskily.

He smiled and boldly opened her dressing gown. He had to swallow hard when he saw she didn’t wear anything but panties underneath. He could see the swell of her breasts and ran his hand along the gap between them, it made her gasp. When he reached her belly he moved his hands inside her dressing gown and around her waist until he reached her back.

“Like this?” He asked again as she felt his fingers massaging her, running along her until he found the small of her back.

“Mm-hm”, she hummed. She couldn’t grasp one coherent thought as he held her close. She was practically naked, her gown clinging to her front only ever so slightly but it didn’t seem to deter him. He was resting his forehead against hers and they swayed a little from side to side.

“You’re beautiful honey.” His breath tingled against her lips.

“If you keep this up I can’t guarantee anything.” She whimpered.

“I don’t want you to.”

And just as his hand played with the hem of her panties she leaned in, trailing soft kisses along his jawline until she reached his lips. She licked them lightly and he opened his mouth with a moan and met her tongue with his. The pleasure she gave him was almost unbearable. Every caress of her tongue and every suck on his lips sent him reeling. He pulled back and sat down on the daybed again. Keeping his hands on her waist he lifted her up in his strong arms and placed her on his lap as though she was the lightest thing. Judy straddled him and could feel his erection pressing into her through his pants. He groaned as she ground herself against it a little bit and ran his hands up her thighs to place them on her butt. She leaned in and kissed him very slowly and deeply, letting her tongue play with his before she drew back.

“I want to keep you this way.” She whispered in his ear.

He opened his eyes and could see her breasts, which were now dangerously close to his face, peeking through her dressing gown. He let his hands wander to her shoulder and pulled it down. Judy couldn’t remember the last time someone looked at her like that. He didn’t say anything but his face was full of admiration, wonder and love and it touched her beyond anything.

“Touch me, please.” She breathed.

His mouth found her breasts and he let his tongue run over them, alternating between subtle flicks and soft kisses before he found her nipple and sucked it deeply into his mouth. She arched her back a little and ran her fingers through his hair, letting out a stifled moan. Feeling his tongue on her and his growing arousal through his pants made her delirious and she reached down, running her fingers along him and trying to unzip his pants but he held her back. She groaned in frustration.

“Let me touch you.”

But he only took her hand and kissed it before putting it on his shoulder again. He held her close, both breathing heavily.

“I want you so much right now, but this is not what I imagined our first time to be like.”

“Oh, you thought about that?” She teased him before she leaned in to suck on his neck.

“Judy …”, he pleaded as he cradled her face in his hands. When he had her full attention again he continued,

“Yeah, I did - a lot actually. I’ve wanted you for a long time now.” He smiled at her. “But not like this, not a quickie before work.” He rained soft kisses on her face before he spoke again, “I want to take my time with you.” Judy could feel the butterflies dancing inside of her.

It was hell for both of them but after sharing some more delicious kisses they somehow managed to get away from each other. Judy pulled her gown up again and they were standing in front of each other, neither really sure what to say now that the heat of the moment had worn off a bit.

“I better get dressed. I don’t want to be late, especially since I was here so early.” She chuckled.

“Alright.” He smiled. He wanted to leave but turned when he reached the door and held out his hand to her, she took it, her inquiring eyes staring up at him.

“I want you to know that …”, he was trying to find the right words, “this, between us … it’s really important to me. I don’t want to mess it up. Just know that I would never want to use you in any way.”

“Darling, I know that, and I don’t expect anything from you. And eventhough this is not an ideal situation please know that I’m not going anywhere, you’ll always have me with you. I can’t stay away from you.” Her words touched him and he had trouble keeping it together.

“Judy” He whispered against her lips before he kissed her one more time, trying to convey his love for her through that kiss.

“Come back here tomorrow after work, will you?” She said as she pushed her body against his while her fingers softly stroked his neck, sending a shiver through him.

“You bet.” He gave her one last kiss and left through the door.

____________

They were both surprised that rehearsals for their “Be A Clown” number went smoothly considering what went on before. But they both knew how to separate work from personal matters. It also helped that they truly enjoyed each other’s company in any way they could. Judy really wanted to do the number and Gene loved seeing her having as much fun with it as she did. It brought out her inner Vaudevillian and she loved to play around with it. By Tuesday they had already managed to rehearse great chunks of it.

“It makes me so happy seeing you like this.” He said to her afterwards.

“I love it.” She beamed at him. “Thanks for making this so easy for me.”

“I didn’t do anything. It’s all you honey.”

He leaned in and kissed her forehead.

“See you then.” He said as he winked at her and she smiled back at him knowingly.  
_______________

Gene was whistling happily as he walked to her dressing room. He couldn’t get there fast enough and he could feel himself getting more nervous the closer he approached. When he reached Judy’s door he knocked softly and waited for her reply.

“It’s open.” He heard her voice chime from the other side of the door.

He opened it and couldn’t believe his eyes when he saw her. 

“Jesus.”

She was standing in front of him wearing only her dressing gown which she had pulled off of her shoulders so that her chest was bare. Seeing her full breasts like that made him hard almost instantly

“Why don’t you pick your jaw off the floor and get over here?” She asked him in a low voice.

He walked closer to her and placed his hands around her waist, nudging her gown open a little bit more as he stepped into her.

“You’re amazing.” He said as he looked at her in wonder.

“I thought you might like to continue where you left off.” She whispered against his lips flirtatiously before placing a soft kiss against them while starting to unbutton his shirt.

“Oh, I will.” He chuckled as he reached under her butt and lifted her.  
As Judy placed her legs around him she could feel the already prominent bulge in his pants and she sighed in pleasure. He moved one hand further around her bottom to gain better purchase on her while his other hand reached up to cradle her face, kissing her so slowly and sensually she almost swooned.

“I love you baby.” He whispered inside her mouth.

And she had know doubt about it as he showed her just how much that was true.


	2. Chapter 2

July 1947

“Oh my goodness, finally. I won’t move another inch for at least a week.” Judy sighed in exhaustion as she let herself sink onto her daybed.

Gene laughed as he sat next to her, picking her legs up to place them on his lap.

“A whole week?” He asked as he let his fingers play along the soft skin of her legs. “You might miss out on something.”

“Oh really?” She asked teasingly as she propped herself up on her elbows, gazing at him with a wicked grin. “And just what might that be?”

“Oh, I don’t know”, he held her ankle up a little and leaned down to place kisses along it, “might get a little physical though.”

“Oh,” Judy had trouble thinking as his lips ran along her calf, covering it in kisses. He had to smile when he looked up and saw she had closed her eyes and leaned her head back slightly, her mouth hung open, trying to control her breathing

“But seeing you’re so exhausted, I think it might be wise if you just lay there and relax.”

Gene leaned over a little while he let his lips glide over her legs, inching upwards while kissing her skin and flicking his tongue over it. When he reached her inner thighs Judy moaned and clenched her fingers in his hair. Gene chuckled as she lifted her bottom off the bed slightly, whimpering in frustration and he ruched up her skirt and moved his fingers into the hem of her panties to slide them off. He was getting aroused when he saw her open and ready for him and placed her legs over his arms to lean in further. He continued his kisses on her thighs but only got near the place she wanted him to touch the most. Judy was aching for him and whined desperately, reaching down to take his head in her hands as she tried to guide him to her.

“Shhh”, he hushed her.

“Please touch me.”

“I am.” He teased her as he placed soft kisses against the very top of her inner thighs.

“I hate you.”

He laughed as his lips hovered over her now completely drenched center. He could smell her arousal and it made him even harder. When he finally placed his tongue against her and sucked on her opening Judy let out a relieved moan. He moved up quickly and silenced her with a deep kiss before looking into her eyes.

“You’ll need to be quieter than this babe.”

“You mean quieter than yesterday?” She giggled while she nibbled on his lips.

“Definitely.” Memories from that day rushed through his head and she could feel him twitch against her through his pants.

“I couldn’t help it, I loved it.”

He snickered and trailed kisses down her neck as he made his way back between her legs.

“Try okay?”

And he continued where he had left off just a moment ago as he traced the outline of her folds with his tongue, trying to savour every reaction of her; how she pulled his head closer to her; the way she pushed up her hips to meet his mouth as he sucked on her swollen bud relentlessly, how her legs tightened around his back when he licked her from top to bottom only to enter her with his tongue. His pants only grew tighter as he heard the stifled whimper that escaped her mouth.

“Babe please … I want you inside me when I come.”

He got to his knees and quickly unzipped his pants while she propped herself up on one elbow, watching him as he slid them down. She opened her legs wider for him and looked at him with a wicked grin.  
A moan escaped him when he entered her and could feel her inviting warmth sucking him in deeper.

“Shhh”, she whispered in his ear as she wrapped her legs tightly around his back, not letting him escape. She kissed her way to his lips and sucked on them slowly.

“You really can’t be this loud darling.” She breathed in his mouth while she didn’t stop rocking her hips against him.

But he just chuckled and deepened their kiss as he continued 

______________

Judy woke up feeling happier than she had in a long time. She couldn’t have imagined a better way to end their work on the picture. Memories of the last evening crept up in her head and she started giggling uncontrollably as she rolled over on her stomach and pulling the covers over her head. The prospect of working with him again in just a few months made her excited already. She hoped that it would give them some time to be together again. They had agreed to make time for each other during the summer but she knew it wouldn’t be the same. Not being able to see him every day would be tough.  
Suddenly she heard the door opening and she peeked through the blanket as Vincente came inside. He sat down next to her on the bed.

“Good morning.” Judy said as she sat up.

“Good morning.” he answered her quietly.

Judy became concerned, something wasn’t right and an uncomfortable feeling took over in her stomach. “What’s the matter? You look terrible.”

When he ignored her teasing him she knew something was off and she had a sense of what it might be.

“There’s been something on my mind for quite some time now and I really need to talk to you about it.”

Judy made a gesture with her hand indicating for him to go on. Vincente took a deep breath before he spoke.

“Judy, I know about you.”

“Who?” She tried, but knew that it wouldn’t help saving anything. Of course she was aware of who he was talking about.

“You and Gene.”

Judy looked to the other side, avoiding his gaze. She didn’t say a word, hoping he would just evaporate.

“So it’s true then?” He tried again but still nothing would come out of her mouth.

“Aren’t you going to say anything?” Finally she looked back, scowling at him.

“Well, what do you wanna know? What the sex is like? It’s damn good, thank you.” She snapped back, suddenly very angry that her happy bubble from before had now officially bursted, even though she knew she had only herself to blame for this. In fact this made her even angrier. He had expected the small attack but hearing her words hurt nonetheless.

“Oh, I’ve heard that …” He mumbled to himself.

“Have you been lurking in front of my door or what?”

“Judy.” She could tell he was getting annoyed. He came with good intentions and her offensive behaviour didn’t mix well with that. She was starting to feel sorry and tried to calm down a bit.

“How long have you known?”

“Why don’t you let me do the asking for a change?” His voice got a little louder. Vincente was always so collected so for him to raise his voice told her that she should better play along. When no snappy answer of hers followed he continued.

“How long has this been going on?”

“Not long. It started last month when Gene took the week off. When we got back to work we … well … you know. Since then we’ve been seeing each before or after work or … during breaks.”

Vincente sighed. “I heard you with him a couple of days ago. I wanted to discuss something with you and … well, let’s just say there was no doubt about what was going on in your room.”

Damn, Judy thought but she knew what day he was talking about. She could recall being particularly uninhibited that day … She also remembered fearing that she would regret it later.

“Actually I already figured there was something going on that night at Ciro’s. He couldn’t keep his eyes off you.” Vincente added.

“Well, then you’re not alone. Betsy thought so too.”

“Does she know about it?”

“Well no, not really but she has had her … assumptions, I guess.”

They kept silent for a while. Both being uncomfortable as thoughts raced through their heads.

“Do you love him?”

Judy could only nod as tears welled up in her eyes, starting to make their way down her face.

“Does he love you?”

“Yes.” She answered, while attempting to wipe her tears away.

“Well, he’d be a fool if he didn’t.” He uttered under his breath.

Judy leaned forward and reached out her hand to cover his that he had placed next to him on the bed. He looked at her and she could see the anger in his eyes, but most of all there was sadness.  
Suddenly Judy felt deep regret about what she did. Not what she had with Gene, that was impossible. But about the way she had treated Vincente. He didn’t deserve any of this. He was the nicest man. She felt comfortable around him and knew that he would always have her back and she did love him but if she was honest with herself she knew their relationship wasn’t based on anything more than companionship.

“I didn’t mean to hurt you, Vincente … I truly am sorry.”

Vincente pulled his hand away and stood up, pacing around the room for a while without saying a word. It didn’t help reduce her anxiety.

“Will you stop that and just sit down?! It’s driving me crazy.” She shouted at him when she couldn’t take the silence any longer.

He stopped but still didn’t say anything as he looked at her. She could practically see the battle he was fighting in his head.

“How are we going to figure this out?” She asked in a tiny voice.

“Christ, Judy I don’t have a solution for everything! Maybe you should think about that.” He headed for the door.

“Where are you going?”

“I have to get out of here, I need some time to think.”

“Fine, just leave me here, why don’t you?!” She spat as she took a pillow from the other side of the bed and threw it in his face forcefully before he had the chance to leave the room. He stopped and looked at her in disappointment as he threw the pillow back onto the end of the bed.

“Look, I know we don’t have the kind of relationship you need, but that still doesn’t make it okay to do something like this Judy. For God’s sake, we’re married!”

She could feel herself getting choked up, as she could hear the pain in his voice. But he ignored her and turned to leave the room.

“The nanny is still here but will leave in an hour or so. I’ll be back later so we can talk.”

And with that he slammed the door behind him.

Judy let herself sink back onto the bed. Emotions roaring through her in lightning speed and she clasped the covers in her hands in an attempt to transfer some of her anger into the soft sheets.  
When the tears started running down her cheeks it somehow fueled her and she got out of bed. Self pity wouldn’t help her in this situation. She needed to figure this out.

She quickly grabbed a shirt and some slacks out of the closet and got in the bathroom for a quick shower. Afterwards she went downstairs and peaked through the patio doors into the garden where Liza was playing with her nanny. Even with everything that went on before, it made her happy seeing her daughter play so carelessly as she walked around on her small legs, still slightly unsteady.

Judy sighed as she sank on the couch in the living room and reached for the phone. Chewing on her fingernails anxiously as she was dialing.

“Betsy speaking.”

Seriously? Again?, Judy thought. She definitely didn’t have the energy for any sort of small talk this time.

“Hi Betsy, it’s Judy.” She tried. “Sorry to bother you but I really need to talk to Gene.”

“He’s busy.”

“Will you just ask him if he has time? I wouldn’t have called if it weren’t important. It will just take a moment.”

She could hear Betsy hesitating before she replied, “We, we were just leaving. He’ll have to call you back.”

“Goddammit, would you stop it already?! I know exactly what you’re doing here!” But just then Judy heard some rustling through the receiver.

“Judy?”

Just hearing his voice was enough for her tears to emerge again but she tried keeping it together, though with only minimal success.

“I know you can’t talk right now but this morning’s been terrible.”

“Shh, just calm down, I’m here.”

He waited for her patiently and it touched her that he wouldn’t let his wife listening to him deter him from being there for her.

“What’s the matter sweetheart?” He asked when he heard her breathing going back to normal.

“Vincente … He knows about us.” Judy said in a quiet voice. She heard him let out a sigh and continued because she knew he wouldn’t be able to respond the way he wanted to.

“He was pretty upset about it … well obviously. He said he’d be back later to talk more. But I just …”, another sob escaped her lips, “I don’t know what this will mean for us.”

“Where is he now?”

“I don’t know Gene!” She hissed and regretted it instantly when she added in a softer voice, “like I said, he’ll be back later.”

“Do you want me to come over?”

“No, no don’t … but … can we meet some other time? Maybe Tuesday?”

“Sure.”

“Will you pick me up? Around noon?”

“Of course.”

“Thank you Gene.”

“Don’t worry about it too much … everything will be okay, I promise.”

“Gosh, I really hope so … I have to go now. I love you. Don’t ever doubt that, alright?” He could hear the anxiousness in her voice and it worried him. He hated knowing that she was sitting there all alone now when he couldn’t do anything else for her.

“I feel the same way … Bye.”

Gene sank down in the chair next to the phone and buried his head in his hands. He had feared it would only be a matter of time before something like this would happen and now it did. He also wondered what Vincente might think about him now. They worked well together and he had picked up a lot from him - he really came to like him. But most of all he was worried about Judy and what this would do to her. Her moods had been up and down again lately. He had managed to soothe her a little when she was in a dark place but he wasn’t sure how it would be from now on or whether they would be able to continue seeing each other. The thought of not being able to be with her anymore was enough to break his heart. If there was any way he wouldn’t let that happen, but in the end he had to do what was right for her.

Eventually Betsy returned to the living room. She had stormed off after he had yanked the phone out of her hands. She was standing in front of him, glaring at him with her hands on her hips but he wasn’t in the mood to pay any attention to her.

“What was so important again?”

He stood up so that his face was level with hers.

“Don’t ever do that again Betsy. I can decide for myself which calls I want to take.”

But Betsy simply ignored him and went on.

“What was it this time?”

“She’s … having trouble with Vincente.”

“Why is she calling you then?”

“Well, we’ve spent a lot of time together this year on this picture, we’ve gotten very close, she trusts me.”

“I wonder just how close …” She murmured underneath her breath.

“Stop that.”

“Well, you’ve been in an exceptionally good mood for the last couple of weeks. One can’t help but wonder.”

“Here we go again.”

He wanted to walk past her but she wouldn’t let him as she put her hand on his arm. She looked at him with sad eyes and her voice was hardly audible when she spoke again,

“Why are we even still together Gene?”

“What?”

“I don’t feel like you even desire me anymore … Seriously, would you still be with me if Kerry wasn’t here?”

“Of course, Betsy.” He answered her without much thought. He couldn’t bring himself to answer that question honestly. He just wanted to get out of there and he didn’t want to hurt her even more. Betsy reached for his hands and he let her.

“Then please show me, because I don’t want to lose you.”

She leaned her forehead against his and placed a soft kiss against his lips, he kissed her back. There was hope mixed with doubt in the look she gave him after their lips parted and it broke him a little bit as he realized the lies and entanglements he got himself involved in were only becoming more and more unbearable.

_______________

Gene got to her house a little early but as soon as he stopped the car the front door sprang open and Judy walked outside. It was like she had been sitting there the whole time, just waiting for him to arrive. His heart immediately beat quicker when he saw her. And although Gene could tell how stressed out she was she looked absolutely gorgeous in her red summer dress with a sweetheart neckline that emphasized her chest beautifully. When she got into the car next to him he was surprised that she didn’t lean over to kiss him hello.

“Please let’s just get going.”

Gene was a little puzzled but decided not to ask any questions just yet. After they had driven a few miles he asked her,

“Where do you want to go?”

“God, Gene I can’t make any decisions right now! It doesn’t matter. Just go somewhere quiet where we can talk.”

He chose to ignore her snappy answer and just kept on driving until they reached the coast. He pulled over when he found a small deserted looking parking bay and parked his car. They were looking out on the water and listening to the waves crashing against the rocky shore. It was the only sound they heard for a while since neither of them really knew how to start the conversation. After a couple of minutes Gene couldn’t take it any longer and reached over to take Judy's hand that was playing with the hem of her dress nervously. She gave him a sad look.

“I’m sorry I yelled at you … again.”

“Doesn’t matter.”

“Yes it does. It’s just … Gosh, I hate everything right now!”

“How did your talk with Vincente go?” Gene asked as he softly stroked the back of her hand with his thumb which seemed to soothe her a little.

“He doesn’t want us and our family to fail. He said he still loves me. He wants to try again.”

“Do you want that too?”

“I didn’t want him to find out at all! I didn’t want to have to make any complicated decisions right now. I just wanted to be happy with you …” She cried in desperation before she sank back into her seat exhausted.

“Betsy feels the same way as Vincente …” He answered silently and he felt her hand slipping out of his as she glared at him in disbelief.

“Oh great, did you tell her about everything or what?”

“No, but she suspects there’s more to it. She asked me if we’re just together because of Kerry ... I didn’t know what to tell her.”

“Do you still love her?” She asked as she looked at him intently.

Gene took a while before he answered. This conversation didn’t go the way he had planned it.

“No … Well, at least not in that way.”

“But you do, don’t you?” She laughed a little in desperation “Gosh, this is just great.”

“Judy no, look at me.” He put his arm around her and waited until her eyes didn’t try to escape his anymore before he continued.

“I love you. I love you so much. But don’t you think we should let this rest for a while? At least for the summer. I don’t want to make things harder on you. And I would do exactly that if we were to continue seeing each other. I don’t want you sneaking out of the house just so you can be with me. I don’t want to cause you any more stress. We will start work on Easter Parade in fall. Maybe things have changed by then and we’ll see things more clearly.”

“Oh what a load of crap!” She yelled at him as she tried wiggling out of his hold. “You just wanna get out because this is getting too complicated for you and you wanna be with your wife again. Just admit it!”

In less than a second she had opened the door and was out of the car. He got out and ran towards her. When he reached her he pulled on her arm to turn her around and she landed against his chest. And even though she tried to get his arms off of her he held on tight.

“Let me go you piece of shit!” She screamed as she started punching his chest but he just placed his hands around her wrists and held them down.

“Stop that Judy!” She looked at him full of anger, breathing heavily “Look, I get that you’re angry but what I said is true. You’re everything to me and I don’t want you to get hurt!”

She could see that he genuinely meant what he said but it just hurt too much that he would just let her go like this and didn’t even want to fight for them. Who knows what would be in a few weeks. Everything could be different by then. In her head he had abandoned her and betrayed her trust.

“If that were true you wouldn’t do something like this! And now let. go. of. me.” And she broke free from his hold with a forceful movement of her arms. She walked back in the direction of the car and Gene followed her but when she reached the door she just walked past it.

“Where are you going?” He shouted after her.

“The hell away from you.”

“You can’t walk all the way back, that’s crazy. Get back in the car! I’ll take you back if you want.”

She stopped and turned around. Even with the mood she was in she was still the most beautiful woman he had ever seen. He got over to the passenger’s side and held the door open for her.

“Will you just get in the car? Please.”

Grudgingly Judy stomped back to the car and got inside, shutting the door behind her as she yanked it from his hands.

They both didn’t say a word to each other the whole way back. Just before they got to her house Gene pulled over.

“This isn’t how I imagined this day to turn out. I only wanted to be there for you Judy.”

“Well, too bad. Goodbye Gene, I will walk from here.”

“Wait.” Gene said before she could grab the handle and she turned around to face him.

“For what?” He could see the emotions in her eyes switch from anger to actual desperation as she suddenly looked very small in her seat, letting her head hang low as she said to him in a quiet voice,

“I can’t believe this is happening … It seems like we’re breaking up and we haven’t even really been together … how ironic is that?”

He held out his hand to her and she took it. Carefully he tugged on it and she complied as she scooted over a little bit. Gene cradled her face in his hand and he could feel her yielding to him as she let her lips brush his palm. He leaned in and placed a soft kiss against her lips. When he could feel her lips trembling a little under his he pulled back and rested his forehead against hers.

“It’s not breaking up.” He whispered softly against her lips.

“Then why does it feel like it, Gene?”

___________

Judy really gave it her all but the summer turned out to be terrible. She felt lost and didn’t know how to return to her normal self. And just as much as she felt like he had deserted her and was really disappointed in him she couldn’t keep her mind off of him. Oftentimes she wanted to call him, just to hear his voice but she didn’t cave.  
Her relationship with Vincente didn’t improve. After she got out of Gene’s car and back into the house it was like she had created an invisible shield around herself and she wouldn’t let Vincente come near her. In a way it felt like he had robbed her of one of the things that brought her the most joy and she couldn’t stand being close to him anymore. They would talk and live their day to day life together as a family but with each passing day her hopes that things between them would get better only shrank. Judy could see that he tried to make things better between them but each time that happened it felt as though he was suffocating her while at the same time being equally emotionally unavailable to her. It drove her mad!  
Judy knew that he was supposed to direct Easter Parade and the thought of it was enough to make her sick to her stomach. She wouldn’t be able to cope with everything that went on during the past weeks. It was nerve wrecking enough working with Gene again, not knowing what their relationship would be like. She didn’t need Vincente there making her nervous with his perfectionism and the image he had created about her in his head that she didn’t want to fulfill anymore. Also she didn’t want to mix work and private life again. It didn’t work out for him and her.  
Of course, this only gave room for more fights and tension in the house but eventually the studio caved and she got her way as they hired Charles Walters as the director. She loved Chuck and got along and worked well with him. She knew he would make her feel comfortable and included in the process of making the picture and it helped soothing her mood a bit.  
But what helped the most during this rough time was Liza. Judy loved watching her grow and learn new things each day and she would spend a lot of time with her playing outside, taking her to the beach or just cooking something and turning the kitchen into a mess.  
Over time she could see that Gene had only tried to help her when he decided that they shouldn’t see each other for the time being but the fact that he didn’t even try to contact her the whole summer disappointed her immensely. By the time they started work on the film she was so pissed off that she didn’t know how she should get through even one scene with him. At the end of September they would start rehearsals but Judy was already a nervous wreck days before and couldn’t concentrate on anything.

Gene was already there when Judy came into the rehearsal hall. She was late but he didn’t mind. He was just happy she came at all. Not knowing what to expect from their first encounter after all these weeks made him quite apprehensive. She walked towards him through the rehearsal hall and he met her halfway. She tried to hide it but Gene could tell she felt the same way as him. He wanted to give her a hug when they were standing in front of each other but she held back with a frosty look on her face.

“What? Did you think we would pick right up where we’ve left off?” She snapped at him when she saw the baffled look he gave her.

“No I-”

“You didn’t even call Gene! Not one SINGLE call! The whole time!” She didn’t plan her emotional outburst but when he tried acting like nothing had happened it just spilled out of her. When he didn’t return anything, she continued.

“So don’t ever try to tell me again that you did it for me and that you love me! If you really knew me you would’ve known that this of all things wouldn’t help me. I don’t even know how we will get through this damn picture together!”

Judy seemed to be finished with her rant when she sank down on one of the chairs, seemingly exhausted. Gene slowly walked a little closer to her.

“Can I say something now?”

“Make it quick.”

“I really thought I would do you a favour.” He heard her let out a laugh but he just kept going. “I shouldn’t have let you go like this. If I’ve lost you forever now I could understand it. I was an ass and I know that now. I felt terrible about it as soon as you got out of the car. I hated to see you leave.”

Judy could see the pain in his eyes and it touched her. She could feel her heart shift a bit.

“Good.”

She sighed and got off the chair before she walked past him.

“Let’s just get started then, before I change my mind. The sooner we will be out of here. Now, show me this damn dance that you made up in your big ol’ head.” The tone in her voice made him relax a little and he followed her.

She didn’t want to let it happen but even with all the tension that still hung between them the familiarity they shared with each other soon took over and she had to admit that she felt comfortable with him besides everything that went on between them.  
They went through the major part of the choreography so Judy could get a rough idea of the whole number. It pleased him to see her laugh every once in a while and that she seemed to return to the Judy that he remembered. There was still a lot of tension between them but the exhaustion at the end of the rehearsal seemed to have diminished it a little. Judy let herself sink down on the floor in exhaustion.

“I think that was quite enough for today.”

“You did well.”

She gave him a little smile before she turned her head away to escape his eyes that lingered on hers.

“Judy?”

“Mhm”

“May I ask you something?”

“Shoot.”

“Did anything change between you and Vincente? I mean how are things between you? It feels like you didn’t even get to tell the whole story, you know … that day.”

“What do you think?” She said with an empty gaze.

“It doesn’t matter what I think. Would you tell me about it?”

“No it didn’t change … If anything I feel like it’s even worse than before now. It seems like we’re completely estranged from each other … It’s a dead end.”

“I’m sorry Judy.” 

Her face turned cold as she looked at him.

“And for you? Was it worth it?” 

“No, no it wasn’t.” He answered with sad eyes, thinking about what he might have lost.

Gene got off the floor and to his surprise she held out her hand to him so he would help her up. He didn’t let go of it and only held it tighter when she stood next to him. He looked at her and asked,

“Will everything be okay between us? … I mean working with each other again and everything.”

She nodded at him and said, “Just give me some time alright?”

He brought her hand up to his lips and kissed the back of it.

“Judy, I’m just happy to be with you again.”

The following days went by without any special incidentes. Gene could tell Judy tried keeping him at a distance but nevertheless they got along better with each day that passed and he was just relieved that he could spend time with her again. He tried his best to keep her spirits up and he could tell by the way she laughed at his jokes or the way she listened to him talking that the walls she had built up around herself were slowly tumbling down.

By the end of their first week together Judy wanted nothing more than to be with him again. He still had such power over her that one touch was enough to make her ecstatic. She could feel he wanted her too but she wouldn’t go there. It had to be him this time. But that didn’t mean she couldn’t give him a little help.

________________

“Oh, Chuck?”

Gene had just walked past Judy’s dressing room and was discussing a scene with Chuck when he heard her voice. 

“Yes?”

They both stopped and turned around as Judy walked towards them. Gene didn’t even know where to look first but he prayed that Chuck didn’t notice how he couldn’t keep his eyes off of her. She wore a men’s suit jacket that ended just below her bottom, a light pink shawl underneath it to cover her chest, a pair of sheer black stockings and black heels. She held a black fedora in her hands.

“We found it.” She chimed as she wiggled the hat in her hands. “Do you think this will do?”

“Yeah, it’s perfect, looks really good.”

“Not too much?” She asked as she placed her arm around his waist.

“No you look wonderful dear. What do you think Gene?” Chuck turned them around a little to face him and he hoped he could hide his real thoughts as he looked her up and down. She looked so hot that he just wanted to pin her against the next wall.

“Uhm, yeah … no I think it’s fine.” He tried to get out, as he could see her resting her other hand on his chest. There was a certain spark in her eyes that told him she did it to try to make him jealous and he hated to admit that it worked. He could feel his insides clenching.

She didn’t acknowledge him any longer and turned her attention back to Chuck. “Say, do you have a moment darling? I need to talk to you about something.”

“Sure. Gene, we’ll talk later, alright?” But before Gene had a chance to answer Judy had already dragged him into her dressing room.

The whole day he couldn’t concentrate on anything else. He just roamed about the rehearsal room trying to improve the choreography for Steppin’ Out With My Baby but whatever he did, he wasn’t pleased with the results. When it was already late afternoon he gave up, this would have to rest for the day.  
When he walked back to his dressing room he came by the rehearsal hall he knew Judy would be in. He couldn’t resist and opened the door slightly to peek inside. He entered when he saw she was all alone, going through the choreography on stage. She quickly noticed him, giving him an amused smile when she turned around.

“Do you always creep up on people like this?”

She asked him as she sat down on the floor, letting her legs dangle from the edge of the stage.

“What do you think?”

He walked up to her.

“It’s good, but I think you could do more with the hat.”

“Like what?”

“It would look better tilted. Play around with it a little.”

She reached around and grabbed the fedora that was sitting behind her before she placed it on her head. She nudged it a little so it covered her face slightly on one side.

“Like this?” She asked him with a wicked smile on her lips and he could only return it when he stepped closer to her. He was touching her legs now and to his surprise she opened them for him and wrapped them around him carefully so he couldn’t stepp away. Gene placed his hands on her thighs and she leaned forward until her face was just inches away from his and asked mischievously,

“Not too sexy?”

“Way too sexy,” he answered smiling at her, “but I don’t mind.”

The look she gave him was so sweet that he couldn’t help it. He brought one hand up to cradle her face and he could feel the tension moving out of her body when she snuggled against it. He brought her head a little closer to his and brushed his lips lightly over hers, not quite kissing her. His heart fluttered when she didn’t pull back and just closed her eyes.

“I miss you every day, baby.” He whispered against her lips.

“Tell me what you miss.”

“This.” He answered and let his hands wander to her bottom to pull her closer against him. She sucked in her breath and looked at him with pleading eyes.

“And this.” His lips fell on hers and he didn’t hold back this time as he kissed her deeply. Gene could feel her legs tightening around him and a shiver running through her body. She wanted to cry out with joy when his tongue ran over hers and she could feel him wanting her again. He pulled back way too soon. 

“But most of all I missed this.” He continued, looking at her as he still held her face in his hands. “Just feeling you close to me, knowing I have everything I could ever want right in front of me.”

She was completely overwhelmed and touched by his words but also frightened of what they might lead to.

“I’m so sorry I wasn’t there for you babe.”

She leaned in and kissed him one more time before she said,

“I guess we should stop this. You know, before someone comes back.”

“Yeah, I guess.”

Gene lifted her off the stage and they left the room.

“Are you finished for the day?” He asked her as they were walking back to their dressing rooms together.

“Yes, I think I’ll just head home.”

When they stood in front of her door he thought she would at least kiss him goodbye but he was mistaken as she just placed her hand on his arm and said,

“See you tomorrow Gene.”

He couldn’t believe it. He had held her in his arms just a few minutes ago and he could feel that she wanted him just as much as he wanted her but now she was all distant again. This was one of these times again when he just couldn’t figure her out. He could understand she was still hurting but he would have given a lot to be able to look inside her head at that moment. When Gene returned to his dressing room he groaned in frustration as he sank down on his daybed. But soon he pulled himself together and got up to get changed and leave. He just wanted to get out of there by now. He had just pulled off his shirt and pants when he heard a knock at the door but he didn’t have time to answer as the door flew open not even a second later. He turned around and saw Judy standing in the door frame, still in her costume, looking at him in distress, seeming like she didn’t know whether to come inside or walk away again.

“Would you please close the door Judy?”

Her look changed to anger when she stepped inside and slammed the door shut behind her.

“Did you mean that?” She asked as she leaned against the closed door.

“What?”

“Your little speech from before?”

“Yes.”

“You didn’t just try to woo me by being … all romantic?”

He came closer and took her hand.

“No Judy, I said it because it’s the truth.”

“Well, don’t you dare blame me for having doubts!” She shouted at him.

Gene couldn’t hold back any longer as he saw the emotions roaring through her. He wanted her to believe him, he missed her and he wanted her. Without a second thought he gathered her in his arms and she could only let out a surprised gasp before his mouth found hers. She opened her mouth hungrily for him and ran her hands up his bare chest until she reached his neck, clinging to his body.

“Oh honey”, he groaned against her lips before he lifted her and pushed her against the door, all the while her mouth didn’t leave his as she kissed him so slowly and deeply that he almost swooned. He could feel her releasing all of her pent up emotions through that kiss and they seemed to move right through him as she wouldn’t let go off him one second. He tugged on the shawl that covered her chest and tossed it to the side before he undid the buttons on her suit jacket in a second and stepped back a little to rip it off of her shoulders. He leaned one arm against the wall while he was still holding her with the other and left her lips reluctantly but he just had to take a look at her. The only clothes left on her body were her black heels that he could feel digging into the back of his legs slightly, her stockings and her black lace bra that her full breasts filled beautifully. She breathed heavily against his lips as she returned his gaze, feeling his erection stir against her through his boxers.

“I take it you like what you see?” She grinned at him and pushed back against him, making him gasp.

“You have no idea.”

Judy reached up and pulled the straps of her bra down before she unclasped it and tossed it to the side. He couldn’t hold back when her breasts were bare right in front of his face and he bent forward a little and let his lips run along them. Letting his tongue glide over her nipple he flicked it before sucking it softly into his mouth. She moaned out a little too loud as she felt his lips on her, hearing his lips sucking on her. When his hand wandered to her stomach and reached inside her panties she was gone. It felt so good feeling his fingers on her again and she could hear him sighing when he found her wetness.

“You’re so wet darling. I want you so much.”

“Yes, yes.” She nodded and loosened her legs on him so he would let her down. He let her shove him a little until he felt the daybed behind him and sank down.

“Take these off.” She ordered him as she pointed to his boxer shorts. He complied and he could see her getting rid of her panties as well. But when she started rolling her stockings down he held her arm,

“Leave them.”

Judy gave him an amused smile before she got on the bed, straddling him. 

“Do you like them?” She asked innocently as she adjusted herself on his lap, feeling his cock stir against her belly as he ran his hands up her thighs over the thin material. When she reached down between them and started slowly stroking his shaft he was lost. He closed his eyes and leaned his forehead against hers, his breathing becoming heavier.

“Judy…”

“Ye-es?”

And before he could even react she lifted her bottom and guided him inside of her. His lips trembled against her as he tried to stifle a moan. Feeling her wet tightness surrounding him again after all these months floored him and he couldn’t believe how close he had come to losing her. He wanted never to let her go again. He enveloped her in his arms and kissed her hungrily as he rediscovered every part of her body. She could feel him building up a slow and steady rhythm as he thrust deeply inside of her. Nothing ever would feel this good and she knew it. She felt so relieved having him again but it also frightened her. She knew he would be able to hurt her as much as he loved her and she couldn’t have that again. Judy held him down and brought her hands up to his face. She kissed him softly before she held completely still and looked deeply into his eyes.

“Listen to me.” She said urgently, seeing the pent-up desire in his eyes as he wanted to continue but he held back.

“This can’t be a one time thing, I want us to be with each other. Promise me we’ll figure something out.” She couldn’t hold back any longer herself when she felt him jerking a little inside of her and she started moving against him slightly. Suddenly he lifted her and pushed her so she lay on the bed. He opened her legs and wrapped them around his waist as he entered her again very slowly and she could feel every inch of him as he moved deeper inside of her than ever before. Feeling him filling her so completely made her delirious and she moaned against his lips as he kissed her.

“Yes, yes I promise.” He answered and when she saw the soft gaze in his eyes she knew that he meant it.

“Alright.” She breathed and she could feel his tongue nudging her mouth open as he picked up his rhythmic thrusts that pushed her deeper into the bed. Their bodies clung together and she wrapped her legs even further around him when she could feel him hitting the perfect spot inside of her. He gathered her wrists in his head and pinned them above her head as he trailed kisses along her neck and over her chest until he reached her nipple. He ran his tongue over it so softly that she shivered.

“I missed this so much.” She sighed.

He returned to her lips and his kiss was filled with so much love that she could feel tears building up in her eyes.

“Do you believe me now?”

“Yes, yes.” She whimpered into his mouth and could feel him building up their rhythm as his lips jerked against her harder.

Judy loved the way he made her feel when he made love to her. Whether it was slow and deep or more unrestrained she always felt cherished in his arms. She could feel her climax building up inside of her and knew that he was close too when his body tensed and shivered with each stroke as he clung to her body. But just as they were prepared to let go completely they heard a knock at the door. Judy could see the panic in Gene’s eyes as they both realized they didn’t lock the door.

“Gene, are you still there? I was hoping we could continue working on the dance.” They could hear Chuck’s voice from the other side of the door.

Judy was still breathing heavily and Gene placed his hand over her mouth trying to silence her. He was praying that he would just go away as he could do nothing more than hope that they wouldn’t get caught. It took everything he had to keep from groaning as Judy tightened her muscles around him and continued grinding her hips against him slowly. Another knock followed but after a few seconds he could hear him walking away. Gene sighed in relief and looked down at Judy who just grinned at him.

“That was close.”

“I know what you did there.”

Her nails ran down his spine softly and she could feel him shake a little underneath her fingers.

“I can’t keep still with you inside me.” She cooed with beaming eyes.

He picked up his pace again and soon he could feel her tense around him as she met his hips with every stroke. She arched her back and moaned against his lips, a little too loudly but he was too far gone to stop her this time. He didn’t care anymore. He loved hearing how much he could please her and just when she reached her climax and he could feel her pulling him in further he pressed his lips against hers and kissed her hard as he felt his own release roaring through him.  
He sank down on top of her breathing heavily and she enveloped him with her arms and legs, enjoying the little twitches she could still feel from him inside her as he calmed down slowly.  
Eventually he rolled over and lifted her leg over his hip as he pulled her close. Judy watched him as he lay there before her, eyes closed, his lips slightly parted and she placed a soft kiss against them before she murmured,

“No one could ever make me feel like this. I’m so in love with you.”

He returned her gaze and gave her his sweetest smile before he kissed her one more time.

“You have my heart, babe.”

“Good.” She returned but he was already starting to place kisses against her chest again, seeming like he wanted to start all over.

“Gene”, she tried to stop him.

“Mhm”, he hummed.

“I think we should better continue this some other time.”

He stopped his kisses with a sigh and gave her a look. Judy giggled as he got up reluctantly.

After they got dressed, Gene wrapped his arms around her, not wanting to lose their physical connection just yet. 

“Still worried about Chuck?” She asked as she rested her head against his neck

“Yes.” 

“Don’t. He probably just thought you weren’t there”, she looked up at him seeing his troubled eyes and she added, “or that you screwed some chorus chick.”

He chuckled and squeezed her bottom making her squeal. “I would never do that.”

“Ohh, I’ve heard some stuff, darling.” She whispered flirtingly while her lips still hovered over his.

“Well maybe you shouldn’t believe everything you hear, babe.” He returned and kissed her once more.

“Either way, I need to go.” She wiggled out of his embrace and stepped in her heels that were still lying on the floor next to her fedora. She picked it up and walked to the door before she turned to him once again.

“Oh, by the way - I kinda like that you were jealous today.”

“I wasn’t -” He tried but she didn’t listen.

“Yes you were. See you tomorrow, darling.” She said before she placed the fedora on her head and tilted it a little, winking at him before she walked out the door.


	3. Chapter 3

Gene was sitting on the sofa, his fingers absentmindedly playing with the cap of the empty beer bottle that was sitting on the small coffee table in front of him. He had been waiting for her to come home for an hour now. She knew he was supposed to meet the boys for a night out. At least that was the official version. A wave of guilt rushed through him at the thought of what he actually planned on doing and his fingers clenched tightly around the cap in his palm. Either way, it needed to happen. There was no escaping it. He was completely enchanted by her and there hadn’t been a chance for them to be with each other again since their last encounter a week ago after such a long time apart. She was like a drug to him, and he needed her - badly. He could only hope she would wait for him.  
Kerry was already in bed and hopefully still sound asleep. It had taken her quite some time tonight to settle down, and she didn’t want him to leave her until she was asleep. It hurt him to think she was noticing the tension in the house as well. He knew his daughter was sensitive to such things. Betsy and him tried to cover it up as good as they could but over the summer and the last couple of weeks it had become clear that there were issues between them that were beyond repair. And he could see she realized it as well when she spent less and less time in his company.  
A couple of minutes later that went by agonizingly slow he could hear the front door being opened and faint footsteps, walking towards the living room.

“You’re back.” 

He didn’t turn around to her.

“Good observation.” She said sarcastically.

“I thought I told you I was meeting the boys later tonight.”

“I must have forgotten.”

She sank into the armchair next to him.

“I don’t think so.”

“Gosh, would you stop it? They’re all coming over anyway for your stupid volleyball game tomorrow, so what’s the big deal? Can’t you spend one evening alone with your wife anymore?” She rubbed her eyes, exhausted.

“That’s not the point.” Gene got off the sofa.

“Where are you going?”

“Like I said, out.”

He heard her following him as he went into the hallway and took his keys from the small shelf next to the door. He definitely wasn’t in the mood for another argument tonight. Turning around to her, he said,

“Don’t wait up for me.”

She reached for his arm before he could leave.

“Why are you doing this?”

“What?”

“Just leaving like that. Why can’t we talk about this?”

“Well, it’s hard to talk when you’re always away.”

She laughed in amusement. “Ha, you’re one to talk.”

“Don’t do that! You know I tried to make it work between us.”

“Well, good. Good, that you had to try so. damn. hard. Gene.” She said angrily as she inched closer to him.

“What do you want me to do?”

He threw his arms out to the side, looking at her defeated.

“I want someone who cares about me, who loves me, adores me. Who makes me feel like he wants to be with me.”

Gene could see the distress in her eyes as her voice got louder.

“I tried to show you that I care. If that won’t do, I don’t know what will.”

“Oh, Gene, let’s just be honest with each other here alright? You don’t love me like that anymore.”

“Yes I do.”

“No you don’t. You don’t desire me anymore. After last week I know this for sure. And believe me, I know the difference now.”

Her comment alarmed him and he took her hand as he dragged her into the kitchen, shutting the door behind them. He didn’t want Kerry to wake up.

“What do you mean you know the difference now?”

“It doesn’t matter.”

“Tell me. Now.” He hissed at her.

Betsy took a deep breath before answering him.

“Well let’s just say you’re not the only one who’s getting some.” She said as she gave him a provocative look.

“What?!”

“A guy from work. He liked me for quite some time now. When I knew you and Judy were back on I caved. It felt good finally being wanted again.”

Gene could feel his insides clenching. Even though he loved and wanted Judy with every fibre of his being, Betsy was still his wife. The thought of her being with someone else hit him harder than he thought it would.

“Who?”

“Doesn’t matter.”

“Yes it does! For fucks sake Betsy?! And you’re just telling me this like it’s nothing … Fuck, I cannot believe this!”

Gene started pacing around the room as he didn’t know how to process the feelings inside of him.

“Don’t you dare make me feel bad about this, you have absolutely no right.”

He could feel himself losing his patience as he stopped and walked up to her again. “I have no right? You fucked another man!”

“And what did you do?” She yelled back.

“Nothing, I-”

But she stopped him right there. “And don’t even try to talk your way out of this, Gene! It’s just a bunch of lies. I could see it in your face, even back in the summer but I chose to believe you then because I was afraid of the consequences it would’ve had for our family if it were true. But I know that smile. You used to look at me that way, you know, but it faded a long time ago. In the last weeks of you working on The Pirate it was back. Then it was all frowns again and one week ago it magically reappeared. I can’t bear any more lies. And no matter how it’s gonna make me feel, I just want the truth now. You lied to me enough about this already. I’ve had it, Gene.”

The way she was able to see right through him all this time floored him a little and he didn’t have a clue how to respond. It seemed like everything was out in the open now and even though he had seen it coming, he still felt overly unprepared.  
His silence and the way he looked down at the floor was the last bit of affirmation that she needed.

She inched closer to his face. “Was it worth it at least? Does she please you?”

Goddammit like you wouldn’t believe, he thought, but he pulled away from her instead.

“I need to get out of here.”

“You’re going to see her now, aren’t you?”

“No.” He didn’t know why he did it but it was all too much for him at the moment. He just wanted to switch everything off, at least for one more night.

“I can’t believe you don’t even have the courage to admit it.” Betsy’s voice was filled with disappointment.

“I won’t deal with this right now, Betsy. We can talk in the morning. I gotta go.”

She just stared at him in disbelief and he felt like a complete ass for it but before she could say another word he was out of the door and on the way to the car.

______________

It was a beautiful night. There was a soft breeze and one wave after the other tumbled to the shore. She thought sitting out on the deck and listening to the ocean might calm her a bit but if anything it made her even more antsy … and cold for that matter. He was supposed to be there almost an hour ago and she was getting rather worried that something might have happened. He had promised her he would be there and she knew by the expression in his eyes he was as desperate for it to happen as she was when she asked him to come. When she found out Vincente would be out of town on a business trip for a few days she knew she would have to make the most of it. She wasn’t sure if he suspected something but either way she couldn’t have cared less. By this point they lived their lives only side by side, most of the time they weren’t even sleeping in the same room together anymore. She told him his snoring kept waking her up when she was finally able to sleep but that was only part of the whole story. The truth was that she saw absolutely no future for their marriage anymore. Another reason why she felt less guilty about doing this.  
She loved this house. Vincente had bought it only a few months ago but it was the perfect place. After a few more minutes Judy got inside and put on another record before she walked over to the mirror in the hall to check herself one more time, being quite disappointed by the reflection that greeted her. Her yellow dress with the fitted bodice still looked good but her hair was a tousled mess and all wavy from the salty breeze.

“Damn”, she sighed in frustration as she tried to fix it.

She sang along to the tune that was playing as she ran her fingers through her hair and tried to pin it up in a half acceptable way when she was startled by a voice behind her.

“You don't need that."

She turned around and saw Gene standing there, looking at her with a loving smile.

“Gosh, why would you scare me like that?” She hissed when she found her voice again.

“I’m sorry honey.” He chuckled as he walked a little closer to her.

He looked so handsome that she could only stare at him - she loved when he wore all black.

“How did you get in here?”

“The gate wasn’t locked.”

“Oh”

“I’m very sorry I’m so late.”

“Did something happen?” She asked but he just waved it off before reaching for her hands to pull her close.

“I just didn’t get the chance to leave earlier.”

Judy saw the wistful look in his eyes but decided not to ask any further questions for now. Instead she brought her hands up around his neck and stroked it softly.

“I looked much better an hour earlier before I decided to wait outside and the wind messed up my hair but I guess you’re just gonna have to deal with this now.”

“I don’t know what you mean,” He said as he ran his fingers through her hair “you look gorgeous.”

“Suck-up, you just wanna get laid.” She teased him.

“Uh-uh” he ran his lips over hers, making her all dizzy, “I just wanna love you Judy.”

He leaned in and kissed her so softly that her skin began to tingle as she felt her body melting against his. 

“I’m not letting you leave tonight.” She murmured when their lips parted.

He nodded before he leaned in one more time, kissing her harder now while his hands ran down her back until they reached her bottom to hold her closer against him. She sighed softly into his mouth when she felt him and slid her tongue over his. It would be so easy to give in right there and then but she wanted to hold out a bit longer. Placing her hands on his chest she gently pushed him away and he looked at her a little confused.

“We don’t have to rush it this time … I want to savour you.”

She ran her thumb across his lower lip and gave him a coy smile before she walked past him.

“I’ll be right back alright? Make yourself at home.”

“Uhm, yeah sure.” He stuttered before she quickly ran up the stairs.

Gene walked into the living room and up to the large patio doors that opened to the wooden deck that surrounded the whole house. The moon lit the ocean in a dim light and he could see the waves tumbling to the shore. The house was relatively small and not overly fancy and he immediately felt comfortable. Judy seemed too - he had never seen her so at ease. He had noticed it right away when he came through the door and watched her for a little while as she adjusted her hair in the mirror while she sang along to the song coming from the record player. A small chuckle escaped him at the thought of it. Why she didn’t consider herself beautiful he would never know.

Judy didn’t even know why she did it but she needed a moment to herself before she went down again. This seemed big to her and she only realized when he got here that this would be their first real night together. When they didn’t have to rush anything and could fall asleep in each other’s arms … She was way more excited and nervous about this than she thought she would be. After taking in a few more deep breaths she climbed down the stairs again and saw Gene lying on the couch in the living room, flipping through the book she had been reading earlier that evening.  
When he noticed her he sat up a little, reaching out his hand to her and she climbed on the couch beside him and snuggled against his chest. He enveloped her in his arms and softly kissed her hair, inhaling her scent.

“Enjoying my book?” She teased him.

“Yes.”

“Well, I had to keep myself busy since someone kept me waiting.”

He squeezed her waist, making her squeal.

“Where did you stop?”

She turned the pages for him and he started reading to her. His voice and the feel of his body against her soothed her immensely but having him so close also distracted her and it didn’t take long before she could feel herself wanting more. She drew her leg over him and let her fingers move under his shirt, caressing his stomach and playing with the soft hair on his chest. Judy heard his breathing go heavier and he stopped reading, placing the book back on the table beside him before he turned to the side, facing her.

“You’re good at distracting me.” He whispered as he drew her leg higher around his hips, ruching up her dress to caress her thigh.

“You’re too, I couldn’t listen to a word.”

“I didn’t do anything babe.”

“Hmm, sometimes that’s enough.” She purred against his lips making him chuckle.

Gene just wanted to give in and kiss her but she stopped him as she suddenly sat up, all excited.

“Do you remember this song?”

He smiled to himself and carefully moved away from her before he stood up. Judy grinned at him when he held out his hand to her.

“You do.”

“Of course baby.” He answered as he took her into his arms.

She cuddled into the crook of his neck while he let his chin rest on her head. They softly swayed to the music as every feeling she had that night came rushing back to her even more intense than before. Now they were alone, now they didn’t need to worry what others might think of them, now they could relish feeling the other as they pleased. Gene seemed to mirror that as he held her closer and didn’t hold back as his hands slid over her back down to her bottom, softly kneading it through her dress, prompting her to moan against his lips as she leaned her forehead against his. She could feel he wanted to kiss her but he held back and she was a little taken off guard when he placed one hand on her back and dipped her very low instead. His look was filled with adoration when he brought her back up and they just gazed at each other as they danced, the music just barely audible to them at this point.

“Do you think we were that obvious then?” She asked him curiously.

“Well I tried not to be”, he chuckled, “though I could only think of one thing the whole time.”

“What’s that?” She tightened her arms around his neck.

“How much I love you.”

Judy could feel her heart clenching.

“... And getting you out of that dress.” He added, making her giggle.

“Well, here’s your chance.” She challenged him.

Gene gave her a smirk before he pulled one of the straps of her dress off her shoulder and bent his head a little as he trailed soft kisses along it until he reached the side of her neck. He could feel her hands on his back clasping him tighter and a soft whimper escaped her lips when he let his tongue dance over the perfect spot. He wanted to devour her there and then but there was something else he wanted to do first. Way too soon he pulled away.

“Not yet.” He answered as he stepped away and reached for her hands, gently tugging on them.

“Wanna go down to the water for a bit?”

She looked at him as though he was messing with her.

“No, thanks.”

Gene wrapped his arms around her waist and looked at her with a smirk on his lips.

“Why not?”

“I was even cold on the deck.”

“Well I won’t let you get cold.” He said and leaned in for a kiss, teasing her with his lips and Judy could feel her resolve melting.

“Yes?”

“Mhm”, she nodded and took his hand as she led him outside. 

They quickly walked around the wooden deck towards the stairs that led to the beach. When she stepped onto the cool sand she immediately was glad that she gave in - it was beautiful here. She had never been here at nighttime before. The moon illuminated the water in a beautiful way and there wasn’t a single soul in sight. This part of the beach was quite narrow and they didn’t have to walk far out until shallow waves surrounded their feet. She reached out her hand to Gene but he was quicker and wrapped his arms around her from behind. Judy relaxed completely when she felt his steady heartbeat and rested her head against him. He kissed her cheek and let his lips linger there.

“Still cold darling?”

She shook her head no and pulled his arms tighter around her stomach before she intertwined her fingers with his. All of the sudden she became very sentimental. This night with him meant everything to her and not knowing when she would have that again made her very anxious. It was like knowing she had everything she ever wanted right in front of her but she couldn’t be sure whether it would be there the next time she checked. She wouldn’t dare look away. She gave her best to stay in the here and now but the thoughts kept invading her mind nevertheless. They needed to have their talk about how they would manage things between them as soon as possible. 

He could feel her fingers tightening around his and knew she was struggling at that moment.

“You won’t lose me.” He murmured against her ear.

The tears welled up in her eyes when she heard him say the words that complemented the thoughts in her head so perfectly. Judy turned around in his arms and he caught a tear on his thumb as it traced her cheek. She swallowed down her fears and gave him a soft smile before tugging on his hand as she started to walk further into the ocean.

“What are you doing? You wanna go swim now?” Gene asked in confusion.

“Hell no, but we might as well make use of this. I never get to do this anymore.”

“Just a moment ago you told me you were cold and that you didn’t wanna go outside and now you wanna wade through the water?”

“Well, you never know with me.” She laughed, giving him a mischievous smile.

She looked so sexy to him with her hair all wavy from the sea air, and her big brown eyes staring up at him as the moonlight hit her perfectly that he couldn’t help it. He pulled on her hand and she landed against his chest before he picked her up in one swift motion. A high squeal escaped her mouth but she soon got comfortable as she wrapped her legs around him. She smiled at him and sighed against his lips when his hands cupped her bottom.

“I could only think of one thing that night too.”

“What’s that?”

Judy placed a hand around his neck and leaned in to kiss him, sucking on his lips seductively as she ground herself against him a little, making him groan into her mouth as she opened for him and his tongue slid inside hungrily. Each kiss was more sexual than the last and Gene couldn’t hold back as he felt his arousal stir.  
He could feel the waves lapping against his legs but they were fairly small so he didn’t pay much attention to them and didn’t notice the bigger wave coming at them. It hit the top of his thigh but the undercurrent was so strong that he lost his footing and tumbled over into the now knee-high water. He tried to keep Judy’s body above the water as best as he could but it didn’t save much - they were both soaking wet. Gene pulled Judy up with him before another wave could hit them and the glare in her eyes when she looked at him frightened him a little but it faltered when what started out as a giggle quickly turned into a fit of laughter, making him join in. 

“I’m sorry honey.” 

She wrapped her arms around his neck and brought her drenched body against his, her dress clinging to it and he could see her nipples through the now very sheer material.

“First you’re late and now this ... you owe me one.” She said with a coy smile.

His hands moved around her waist.

“I already have an idea.”

“Oh, do you?”

He nodded and leaned in to kiss her, but she soon stopped him.

“Maybe we should take this inside, or else another wave might roll over us and you will have so much making up to do I might not let you leave at all.”

“Oh, I could live with that.” He answered and started to move his hands over her body again, making her giggle.

“Come on.” She said and pulled him back to the stairs.

When they were back inside Judy excused herself and Gene walked out on the deck. He got rid of his wet shirt and pants and hung them up to dry. He held on to the bannister as he looked out over the water and even though he tried fighting it his mind wandered off to the fight he had with Betsy just a few hours earlier and he could practically hear her voice inside his head. He didn’t want to be with her anymore. He wanted Judy and only her, of that he was certain but he felt bad about how he had left Betsy. It wasn’t like him and she didn’t deserve it. He knew he promised Judy that they would work something out but he needed to figure everything out for himself first before they could have a proper talk. He could only hope and pray that everything would fall in line soon enough and made a promise to himself that he would see to it.

After checking the living room for Gene, Judy saw him out on the edge of the deck. He was only clad in his boxer shorts and she looked at him for a while, admiring his nearly naked body. Even though she loved what she saw she could practically see the muscles tensing up inside his back and she didn’t like it. Her intuition from before only seemed to manifest itself more.

He jumped a little when she came up behind him and wrapped her arms around him.

“Shhh”, she placed small kisses between his shoulder blades to soothe him and she smiled when she saw goosebumps forming. “I didn’t know you scare so easily.”

His hands moved over hers, clasping them tightly and she could feel the taut skin of his stomach relax a bit as her fingers glided over him.

“Sorry, I didn’t hear you.”

Still kissing him her fingers moved down into his boxers a little before he had the chance to protest. But he didn’t seem to even want to as he leaned his head back and sighed when her fingers found him and guided him out. She stroked his shaft slowly and loved how hard she could make him within seconds, listening to his breathing become heavier.

“You feel so good darling.” She cooed.

“Judy we can’t do this here, let’s get inside.”

“No one can see us.”

And she was probably right. They were right in the corner of the deck with a privacy shield covering most of the other side and the sundeck of the first floor above them - it was like a little bubble. When she slowly tightened her fingers around him he wasn’t able to resist anymore.

“Oh Judy”, he breathed before he took her hand from his stomach and pulled her around to him. His lips found hers immediately and he opened them, letting his tongue slide deeply inside her mouth. All the while she didn’t stop teasing him with her fingers.

“Do you want me to come off right here?” He murmured against her lips after breaking off their kiss.

“Oh, I trust you can hold out a little longer than that.”

“I should hope so.”

“Maybe you’d like to sit for a while”, she kissed him one more time, “you know, get a little more comfortable.” Giving him a mischievous look she shoved him a little until he reached the bench next to the deck chairs.

When he sat down she nudged his legs open with her knee and stepped between them. He wanted to pull her to him but she didn’t let him and knelt down instead.

“Feeling better?”

Gene knew where she was going with this and although he could think of nothing better than her full lips sucking on him the thought alone made him want to come right here and then and he definitely couldn’t have that. It didn’t seem like she’d change her mind though as she got comfortable between his legs, letting her hands run up his thighs.

“Judy, I-”, but his words got lost in a moan when she ran her lips up his shaft.

“Just tell me if you want me to stop.”

Judy closed his lips around him and sucked the top softly into her mouth. She smiled when she felt his fingers weaving into her hair and she let him pop from her mouth gently as she looked up into his darkened eyes.

“That’s what I thought.” And she continued where she left off.

Having her lips on him felt heavenly and he chose to let her have her way with him as he sank deeper into the cushions. He tried to hold back as long as he could but soon he felt his hips moving in tune with her mouth. She sucked on him with great pleasure loving the way he tasted and hearing his muffled groans as he tilted his head back. When Gene could feel his balls tightening he knew he wouldn’t be able to hold out much longer and tugged on her hand.

“Babe, babe”, he managed to get out.

Judy stopped for a moment but didn’t remove her mouth from him as she just let her tongue run along him from bottom to top, slowly circling the tip when she got there.

“Yeees?”

“I don’t wanna come yet.”

“Oh, I wouldn’t mind.” She cooed before tightening her cheeks around the tip one more time, teasing him with her eyes. It took all his willpower but he leaned forward and took her hands from his thighs to pull her up. She complied as she sat down on his lap, straddling him and he immediately noticed she wasn’t wearing any panties. She put her arms around his neck and the look she gave him as she gazed into his eyes was so filled with love that he could feel his heart clenching.

“You’re something else.”

“Too much?”

“No, never too much.” He replied before he reached over and grabbed the light blanket that lay next to them to drape it around her hips.

“Don’t you think it might be a little too late for decency?” She mocked him. Gene ran his hands up the back of her thighs and between her folds, feeling how slick she already was.

“I’ll say.”

“I didn’t think I would need them anymore.” She flirtatiously whispered against his lips before she kissed him.

She started moving her hips against his hand, mirroring his soft caresses and moaned into his mouth in between kisses. He was so hungry for her, he didn’t even care anymore that they were outside, in fact it made him even more aroused. He needed her now. Judy whimpered desperately when Gene moved his hands away from her and placed them on her hips, lifting her up a little. He looked at her pleadingly, asking for her consent but she only sighed and sank down on him, taking in his full length. He held her bottom, feeling her enticing movements as she rocked back and forth on him. As she braced herself on the backrest of the bench she leaned forward a little and when her breast brushed his lips he pulled the top of her bandeau dress down and leaned in, sucking and tonguing her already erect nipple hungrily. He could feel her body shuddering with every stroke and knew she was close when her whimpers became louder. He was too. Reaching between them he circled her pearl with two fingers and she held onto his shoulders as she cried out her pleasure, subdued by the roaring ocean. He could feel her collapsing on top of him after she'd reached her climax and held her tight as he pumped into her a few more times with deep strokes until he came hard. It didn’t seem to stop as Judy could feel him jerking inside of her uncontrollably, holding onto her as he reached for her mouth to kiss her deeply.  
They were slowly calming down. Judy’s head was resting on his shoulder and he pulled the blanket up further to cover her body. She felt so protected sitting there on his lap with his arms around her and loved feeling his heartbeat against her lips as she carefully nibbled on his neck and felt him melt against her even more. Gene placed one finger under her chin and lifted it up so he could kiss her. They moved their lips in slow, lazy kisses still deliciously aroused from what went on before.

“Take me to bed.” She whispered against his lips and he complied immediately as he picked her up, blanket and everything and carried her inside.

They still exchanged slow french kisses as he carried her upstairs, she just couldn’t be away from him for one moment and she could feel him getting aroused again.

When he found the bedroom he put her on top of the bed and removed her dress from her body before lying down next to her. They couldn’t stop fondling each other as they made out on the bed together, nestled in between the soft sheets.

“I’m guessing you don’t care much for sleep tonight.” She teased him in between kisses.

“Uh-uh” he murmured, “I wanna taste you baby.”

She moaned in anticipation as he moved his head between her legs and drew her leg over his shoulder. He darted his eyes up to lock with hers and grinned at her, teasing her expectation. She felt his hot breath on her bud and whimpered as she let her head fall back to give herself up to his touch. She was rewarded instantly as she felt his tongue gliding over her folds. She shuddered out a breath. He teased her a little while longer but then licked hard over her bud. Judy whined and reached down to hold him against her. He closed his mouth over her and sucked so hard she imagined herself being drawn up into him.

“Don’t stop, don’t stop” 

But he had no intention in doing so and didn't stop until he felt her shudder against his lips. Judy was glad she didn’t have to worry about how loud she got as she cried out in pleasure. it was so strong she wanted to roll away from him but he didn’t let her as he kept licking her very slowly, making her shiver all over again until she relaxed under his touch. He moved up between her legs and she lazily wrapped them around him as she let out a breathy giggle.

“Oh my God.”

“You’re incredible, darling.” He whispered as he trailed kisses along her neck, sucking on her supple skin. Tasting and hearing her come made him so hard and he craved her so much but it didn’t feel right to urge her now.  
Judy felt exhausted in a good way but she knew she wasn’t sated yet when she felt his cock stir against her, she needed to feel him come inside of her once more and reached down to guide him to her. He gave her a surprised look.

“You sure?”

Judy could only nodd. “Yes, I need you.”

They made love slowly this time and she got completely lost in his arms as every move of his was only for her benefit. He wanted to please her anyway he could, and by God he did. She couldn’t remember a time when she felt quite like this. It was as though he could read her - she didn’t need to tell him where she wanted him, everything he did was exactly what she needed and drove her more and more towards the edge. She loved the sound of his hips slapping against hers and the way his cock moved in and out of her so slowly and deeply made her delirious. When he could feel her thighs quivering under his hands and she cried out his name as her moans got louder with each stroke he quickened his pace and reached down to kiss her as she came loud and hard, arching her back off the bed moaning into his mouth uncontrollably as he felt his cock being sucked into her even more. He came almost instantly even stronger than before with a loud groan. Judy wrapped her legs around him tightly not wanting to let go of him as she felt him spilling into her again and again. They rested in each other’s arms, completely spent.

“I love you, Judy.”

The emotions she tried to keep inside of her welled over and tears streamed down her face.

“I love you, too.”

Gene kissed her softly and they nestled into each other’s arms, slowly drifting off to sleep.

In the middle of the night Gene woke up a little startled. He was relieved that it was still dark outside, he didn't want it to be over just yet. He propped himself up on one elbow and looked down at Judy who was still snuggled against him, looking more peaceful than ever. This was the first night that they spent together and he knew that he wanted her there every night that followed. All of the sudden he became very sentimental not knowing when that would be possible again. Very carefully he reached down and ran a hand over her soft hair, all tousled from their lovemaking and softly kissed her cheek. This woman was everything to him. He made a promise to himself to make things right. He looked over to the window, completely lost in thought, when he felt her stir next to him. He lay down again and gazed into her eyes.

“Did I wake you?”

“No, that’s alright.”

She seemed to study him a while before she asked,

“Why are you looking at me like that?”

“Like what?”

“All gloomy.”

“Can’t be, I’m too happy being with you.” He tried and pulled her against him, pressing a soft kiss against her lips. He tried hiding his face in the crook of her neck afterward but she wasn’t done with him as she pulled back a little so her eyes could search his again.

“What’s wrong?” She asked, her voice a little more stern now.

“Nothing, honey.”

“Gene, you can tell me about it.”

“No.”

“But I can see something’s clearly bothering you.”

“Can’t we just enjoy this right now? Who knows when we’ll have another opportunity like this again.”

“What do you mean?”

“You know, a night like this together.”

Judy couldn’t believe what he was saying. She propped herself up on one elbow and looked down at him.

“You said we would figure something out. No, you promised me!”

She wanted to hold back but it all came bursting out when she felt like he shut her off from what really went on inside of him - there was no reassurance anymore.

“And we are but I don’t know what the solution to this is right now.”

“Something happened today. I could see it when you walked through this door. What is it? Something with Betsy?”

“I don’t wanna talk about this now.”

“Well, when then? Like you said, who knows when we’ll have another opportunity like this again.”

“No, Judy.” He determinedly said and took her hand off of his chest before he stood up and went out of the room and downstairs. This alarmed Judy and she got off the bed, draping the blanket around herself before she followed him. He was already sitting in the living room, his head buried in his hands.

“What’s this all about?” She tried again.

“Judy please, I’m not in the mood for this.”

“Ha, oh great, so you won’t talk about what's bothering you, but coming here for a good fuck is okay?”

“What did you just say?”

He slowly stood up and she could see he was very offended by her comment but she was too mad to be considerate of his feelings right now.

“Did you get what you came here for then?!”

“I can’t believe you would even think such a thing. You know DAMN well how much you mean to me, Judy. Knowing that I won’t have you by my side everyday breaks my heart.”

“Then why won’t you change anything about it? And why won’t you tell me what’s troubling you so?!” She yelled.

He sighed in desperation.

“Betsy found out.” He quietly said after a while. “She said she could see it in my face. I couldn’t deny it any longer. She also told me she’s seeing someone … I don’t know what to think about all of this. I left before we could really talk. I guess she knows I’m with you right now.”

She knew it was something like this and it made her sick to her stomach that he looked so damn worried about all of this.

“And why are you so fucking depressed about this when it could all work out in our favour?”

“Because I don’t know how to handle this situation.”

“What are you even trying to tell me? That you’re getting cold feet? You want a way out now?”

“No, Judy! But we’re not the only ones involved in this. My family is important to me.”

“Oh, and I don’t give a flying fuck about mine or what?”

“No, that’s not what I said! But you clearly have closed that chapter in your head already.”

He placed his hands on her shoulders, trying to soothe her a bit but she pushed them off.

“And you’re still holding on to her, right?!”

“No Judy, but -”

“No Gene, you’ll listen to me now! You know what I think?” Gene looked at her with eager eyes, awaiting what was about to come next. “This is all just one PATHETIC excuse. You’re just afraid of being with me, of taking a risk, because you don’t trust me enough. You think I’ll drop you, don’t you? When I’m not interested in you anymore ... So you’d rather stay with your wife because that’s nice … and comfy … and homey and you don’t have to risk anything.”

“That is not true!” He hissed but he knew and was ashamed to admit that there was some truth to her words.

“We could work something out if you really wanted it. But I don’t see you wanting to fight for it.”

“That’s easy for you to say. You’re just lucky you’re in an easier situation than I am.”

“I am in an EASIER situation?”

The quiet way in which she said it made him tremble a bit inside and he backed away from her slightly but she wasn’t done yet.

“Are you trying to tell me this is easy for me now? Not being able to be with the man I love while still spending almost every day with him? Knowing that he’ll go home to his wife after? Not knowing if he’ll ever have the guts to want to be with me for good? What in the world is easy about this?”

“Judy, darling I’m so sorry.”

“Do you still make love to her?” She blurted out.

The troubled look on his face told her everything she needed to know.

“When?”

“Judy tha-”

“WHEN?!”

“A week or so ago.”

“After we’ve been with each other again?”

“Later that day …”

Judy reached over, grabbing the book off the coffee table. Gene managed to duck before it came flying at him, missing his face by an inch but knocking over the vase behind him that fell to the floor, shattering into a hundred pieces.

“GET the FUCK out!”

“Judy I didn’t want it to happen, I-”

“Can’t restrain yourself when a woman spreads her legs for you?”  
She walked over to him and pushed him, making him stumble a bit.

“Stop that Judy.”

“I thought that day meant something to you but instead you go home an fuck your five only a few hours after you’ve been with me.”

“And it did. But I couldn’t tell her no, I didn’t want her to suspect something.”

“Well, look how that worked out!” She cried sarcastically and he could see tears forming in her eyes as she shook her head in disbelief. “You know what, you should just go back to her. I might just go back to Vince. Maybe this will be better for all of us.”

Hearing her say all these things hit him in another way but it also made him feel helpless how one thing could make her doubt everything that went on before.

“You really think that? Can’t you tell how much you mean to me?”

“I don’t know, can you? Can’t be that important to you if you go back and forth between us as you please.”

“You’re talking about me not trusting you, yet it seems like it’s the other way around. If you can’t tell how much I love and desire you after a night like this, I don’t know what I'm supposed to do to prove it to you. I won’t talk to you like this.”

“Well, since you already got what you came here for why don’t you just get lost then.” She said in a numb tone before she walked out of the room, leaving him alone. She could see how hurt he was but she couldn’t bear looking at him even one moment longer.

Gene couldn’t believe it. He contemplated staying but her last comment made him so raging mad that every little bit of patience that was still left was drained from him. He gathered his still wet clothes, put them on and went out the door before he could change his mind. When Judy heard the door being slammed shut she broke down, sobbing out her anguish … she couldn’t believe that he would just leave her like this.

______________

Gene felt wretched when he got back home, far worse than if he had been drinking. So at least he wouldn’t have to fake that part when he saw Betsy. The night started out oh so perfectly and just turned into a complete disaster and he didn’t know how to fix it again. He just knew he had to find a way somehow.  
He went into the kitchen and grabbed the bottle of whisky that was sitting in the cupboard and poured himself a shot or two before he downed it in one big gulp.  
Eventually he had drunk enough to work up the courage to go upstairs and he opened the bedroom door and carefully walked inside. But when his eyes adjusted to the darkness he saw that Betsy’s side of the bed was empty and untouched. He quickly walked over to Kerry’s room but she wasn’t there either. When he couldn’t find them anywhere after checking the whole house a rush of fear overcame him. Gene sank down on the sofa in the living room when his eyes fell on the small folded sheet of paper that was lying on the table in front of him. He quickly unfolded it.

Gene,

I couldn’t stand being in the house just one moment longer. I figure you’ve already realized yourself that it wasn’t okay to just walk out on me like that.  
I took Kerry with me to visit my family. We won’t be back before the next weekend. I need some time away from you … In fact I need a lot of time away from you. I could say that maybe we can figure something out when I come back but I have no idea what that should look like. Would it be just holding on to a lost cause? Would it be worth it? I don’t know if we want to spend our lives this way. All of the exhaustion and dishonesty … I don’t think I can handle it anymore, and frankly I don’t even want it. I believe that you love me and that you want to hold on for the sake of our family but I don’t want someone who is just holding on because of some moral principle. I want someone who is all in, for me. Someone who I can be happy with. And if you can find that with her - good, so be it.  
I actually do like her. Though I have to admit it’s a little tainted now. But I suppose I shouldn’t blame her for our failure. Things in life sometimes just aren’t supposed to work out, I guess. So let’s stop pretending, alright? Maybe you should start looking for a place of your own so we can spend some time apart from each other and start working on our new lives. And don’t worry about Kerry - when we’ve worked everything out we’ll talk to her together.

Betsy

He was completely taken aback by her words. They sounded so matter-of-factly and final to him that he didn’t even know what to think. It seemed like she had just made every decision that he worried so extensively about for him. He knew he should have behaved differently and he felt like a complete fool. This wasn’t the way this was supposed to work out. And if he would go back to Judy now it would just seem like he did it because his wife left him. It really bothered him that he hadn’t built up the courage to work everything out himself and a feeling of shame washed over him. Whether it was Judy or his family - he had failed them both.

______________

Judy was home early on Monday since she only had a rehearsal for Mr. Monotony. She was sure she would see Gene anyway but he didn’t show up. She was quite relieved about it though. At least she wouldn’t have to worry about how to behave around him. She regretted everything she said to him that night almost instantly and knew she had crossed a line but she couldn't build up the courage to call him. It frightened her to think that he might not forgive her. Liza was still out at the park with her nanny so Judy decided to have a hot bath to calm down a bit but she didn’t get the chance to do so as the phone started ringing just a moment later.

“Hello?”

“Judy, it’s Arthur.”

“And I thought I would be done with work for the day. Do you want me to come back already?” She joked around.

“No, it’s nothing like that. Listen Judy, I’m sorry but we’ll have to find you another leading man. Gene won’t be able to continue work on the picture.”

Judy almost dropped the handset and could feel her heart drifting into her stomach. It couldn’t be.

“What are you saying?”

“He injured his foot and won’t be able to walk properly for a couple of months. We considered waiting and moving things around but unfortunately it’s just not an option. It would delay everything way too much.”

She wasn’t able to respond. This must be a dream.

“Judy, dear are you still there?”

“Y-Yes.”

“He’s been trying to get hold of Astaire so hopefully that will work out somehow. I think he would make a good replacement, don’t you? … Judy?”

“... Yeah, I-I guess he would. Uhm, sorry Arthur I don’t mean to be rude but I have to go.”

“Sure, I’ll get back to you if I hear something. Or we’ll just talk again tomorrow.”

“Alright, bye-bye then.”

“Bye Judy.”

Judy slowly hung up the phone, almost paralyzed. This was it. How would they be able to work things out if they didn’t see each other every day? They would lose sight of each other again, she knew it. Especially with how things were now. What hurt her most though was that he didn’t tell her himself. Of course, he probably didn’t even know that Arthur was going to call her but if he was able to get in touch with Fred already he could have called her as well. She didn’t know what to make of it but she knew that she definitely needed to clear her head. Judy went over to the mini bar and poured herself a generous shot of Vincente's Whisky, downing it in one go as she built up the courage to reach for the phone. She nervously dialed his number.

“Hello?”

“Why didn’t I hear this from you?”

“Judy …”

“Why does Arthur need to tell me that you’re out?”

“I’m sorry, I would have called you. I just needed to organise some things.”

“Sure.” She couldn’t hide how pissed off she was.

“Fred said he’d do it.”

“Great, maybe you should tell Arthur first, though - not me.”

“Judy, don't do that.”

“WHAT?!”

“Giving me that kinda attitude.”

“Do you even know what that meant to me, Gene? Knowing that I’d have you there with me every day for another few months?”

He could hear her voice breaking as she started to cry. Not being able to be there for her frustrated him even more.

“I didn’t do it on purpose, you know.”

“How did it happen then?”

“At a volleyball game yesterday. I was so upset about everything, I guess it got a little too intense.”

“Wow, so this is all my fault now?”

“Would you stop putting words into my mouth?!”

“Good thing that you were at least enjoying yourself, playing fucking volleyball while I have been miserable ever since you left me.”

“What the fuck Judy?! It wasn’t my idea to leave. You threw me out! What did you want me to do?”

“Maybe you should have known me better than that!” She knew she was being unfair but she didn’t care anymore. At this point she was so angry that she just wanted to hurt him.

“What the hell Judy!? Don’t tell me that I don’t know you.”

“Well, seems like you don’t since you didn’t even CALL.”

“Why should I? I was mad too, you know. What you said to me wasn’t okay.”

“It’s the goddamn truth though.”

“Judy if you can’t see how wrong you are with this I don’t even know what we’re doing here anymore.”

“I won’t take the fucking blame for all of this, Gene!”

“And you’re not supposed to! I know I fucked up! But you won’t even apologize for what you said.”

“Oh, you’d like that, now wouldn’t you? So you can feel all good about yourself again?”

“Jesus Christ, would you listen to yourself?”

He could hear Judy starting to cry again and he kept quiet as he waited for her to calm down.

“Judy honey, I’m here.”

Her voice got all silent when she answered him, like she didn’t have any energy left in her.

“No. No, you’re not. That’s the whole point. you’re not here. You're letting me down … again. Not just with the picture but with everything that happened Saturday. It’s all facts. So what does it matter if I said I was sorry?! What would it change? Would you change anything? Would we have our talk? I thought I found you again but I know now I didn’t, I thought we’d have a true chance but I know now we don’t.”

“Judy it’s not like this and you know it.”

“Yes, it’s exactly like this … But you know what might be good about this goddamn situation?”

“What?”

“Your wife will have you all to herself again now - so you can fuck her anytime she wants.”

Before Gene could say something she had already hung up. Her last comment made him so fucking angry but he couldn’t let this lie. He wouldn’t lose her again. He dialed her number again but she didn’t pick up. After the third try he gave up. He would have to call someone else to be able to get through to her.

“Hello?”

“Frank?

“Hey buddy what’s up?”

Gene let out a deep sigh. “A lot … look, would you do something for me?”

“You in trouble?”

Frank seemed to be quite amused, Gene couldn’t say that he was surprised.

“Can you just come over? I need to go somewhere and can’t drive myself.”

“What happened man?”

“Just come over.”

“Alright, I’ll be there.”

“Thank you.”

______________

It was too silent, way too silent. It was the kind of silence that came after a huge storm had passed. At the thought of it a cynical laugh escaped her mouth … wasn’t too far off. Judy was sitting on the floor of the living room and stared at the mess she’d created. Several books were scattered over the floor which were joined by the sofa cushions and the chairs from the dining table.  
Judy absentmindedly took a long drag on her cigarette and dusted it off on the ashtray that was sitting next to her on the table. She felt numb and drained, it always followed after emotional outbursts. And while it helped release all of the emotions that needed to get out at the time it also seemed to release the good ones she wanted to hold on to.  
Her last comment drove it over the edge. She knew that, that’s why she had hung up. She was afraid to hear what would come next. She knew she had made him very angry. Just after she had ended the call the phone rang again … and again … and again. Judy couldn’t stand to hear the ringing, knowing that it was him on the other end, probably feeling miserable himself and she started throwing things around the room to keep her from caving and answering it. When it finally went silent she sank to the floor in exhaustion as the tears started to dry on her cheeks.  
The voice inside her head told her that she needed to get up and clean up the mess before Liza returned but she was too far gone to care. Only a moment later she heard the front door opening, followed by footsteps walking around the hallway. That wasn’t the nanny.

“Judy?”

She felt like she froze to the floor.

“Honey? Are you there?”

They got closer to where she was and only a few seconds later the door to the living room opened and she could feel Vincente’s eyes looking at her.

“Dear God, what happened in here?”

He walked over to her but before he could reach her Judy freed herself out of her trance and got up.

“You’re early.” She managed to get out in a soft voice.

“What a warm welcome.”

The empty gaze in her eyes really worried Vincente and he placed his hands on her shoulders as he wanted to fold her into his arms but Judy held back.

“What’s wrong? Did something happen?”

“I don’t wanna talk about it.”

“I come home and you’re sitting here on the floor surrounded by a complete mess. You obviously have been crying. Please, you have to tell me what’s going on, Judy.”

“I don’t have to do shit!”

And she freed herself from his hold with a sudden movement before she darted out of the room and up the stairs.

______________

“Look, I know you’re not in the mood to talk right now but you kinda need to tell me where I’m supposed to go. I don’t think you’d be interested in a ride around the block.”

“Evanview Drive.” Gene finally got out.

“Judy’s? Why?” Frank was noticeably irritated.

“Don’t ask questions, just go.”

“Yes, Sir.”

Fortunately Frank sensed his mood and stayed quiet throughout the whole ride over to her house. Gene got more and more tense the closer they got and was glad when Frank finally turned the car into her street. He could see a car in the distance and as they got closer and it turned into the driveway where they were heading Gene knew who it was.

“Damn.”

“What?”

“Keep driving.”

“What?”

“Keep driving!”

“You don’t want me to stop?”

“For God’s sake no, just do as I say.”

Frank drove past her house with a confused look on his face. When he felt like he was far enough away from her house he pulled over.

“What?”

“I won’t keep going until you explain this to me dude.”

Gene groaned in frustration and ran a hand over his face as he looked out the window, avoiding his gaze.

“I’m listening.”

It didn’t seem like he had a choice anymore.

“I needed to talk to her.”

“Well, obviously. About what?”

“We had a fight … she hung up on me ... it was pretty bad. I needed to speak to her in person.”

“Did it have something to do with this?” He asked as he pointed down to his foot.

“Yes.”

“She’s upset because you won’t be able to do the picture with her.”

“Yes, that’s it. So let’s get going, alright?”

“Na-ah, not so fast. That’s not all. You wouldn’t behave so weird if it were only that. Why did you change your mind all of the sudden when you saw Vince’s car?”

“Because I needed to speak to her in private.”

“And how did you know she would be alone … ?”

“I … Jesus Christ, why are you interrogating me like that?”

There was a long pause before Frank spoke again while studying him intensely.

“Alright”, he sighed “how long has this been going on?”

Gene didn’t want to tell him but it didn’t seem like he had much of a choice anymore. He told him everything; How it started; How they broke things off during the summer and how unsuccessful that turned out to be; about their fight in the beach house and about Betsy’s letter. When he was finished Frank just leaned back in his seat, seemingly strained.

“Jeez, I gotta say I sure don’t wanna be in your shoes right now.”

“Well, I should hope so, I wouldn’t wanna lose my job.”

“Look at you, buddy - making jokes again already.” He chuckled as he punched his shoulder.

“No, seriously … What am I supposed to do here?”

“You’re asking the wrong guy here … But with Betsy breaking things off with you … seems like it will just make everything harder. Judy will think that you didn’t have the guts to do it yourself and didn’t even fight for her when you go back to her now.”

“She already thinks that.”

“See.”

“Thanks a lot, man, you’re a big help.”

“Anytime.” He said, teasing Gene. “Can I ask you something?” He asked, his voice all serious again.

“What?”

“Do you love her?”

“Very much.”

“Then you shouldn’t let pride stand in the way of that.”


	4. Chapter 4

Late November 1947

Judy let her hands glide through the warm and cozy water, playing with the soft bubbles surrounding her. Finally she was able to relax for a bit. These last few weeks really took a toll on her. Work on Easter Parade had been very tiring but actually that was the thing worrying her least at the moment since everything went quite smoothly. It turned out she actually enjoyed working with Fred. He was also very much of a perfectionist but he had something very calm and soothing about him and he was such a nice and classy man. Apart from that retakes on The Pirate had started. It was just minor things but there was also talk about removing the Voodoo scene. Some executives didn’t like it - it was too hot in their opinion and they felt like it didn’t fit in and wouldn’t be appropriate for the picture. She wasn’t playing the little girl anymore - that’s why so many didn’t want it in the film … they wanted to block that vision of her out. To them she would always be little Dorothy.  
Judy couldn’t say that it came as a surprise to her but it still frustrated her to no end … It was one of the scenes she really had been proud of. It showed her in a whole nother light. It was so wild and sensual and wonderful and Gene had brought that out in her. Gene … her mind kept wandering back to him - no matter what she did she couldn’t stop it, she missed him so damn much. They had tried to talk a few weeks back when he caught her on the lot after a very stressful day of shooting. She had been kind of taken off-guard seeing him there. But it only took them minutes until they got into a huge argument again. She didn’t even give him a proper chance to talk. It was one “wrong” word from him and her emotions just went through the roof, making him lose his patience for good as he left without another word. She hadn’t heard from him since. She could see that he wanted to tell her something. In her defence it had been a particularly stressful day for her but now she had another indicator of what else might have contributed to her mood.  
Judy had been apprehensive of this for a few weeks now, but seeing the results in cold print today really got to her on another level … pregnant. If she was honest with herself she had to admit that it only had been a matter of time. Although they had tried to be careful before, their last night together obviously had been quite … successful.  
When she started noticing early signs and suspected it she panicked. An illegitimate child would be out of the question when it came to the studio but she didn’t want to go through another abortion. She felt like she had to play it safe and slept with Vincente. It had to be done. There were no other real options here. She was good at getting what she wanted but nevertheless it felt wrong using him like that. They hadn’t slept together in quite a while and she could see that he was surprised given their current situation but after a nice evening they spent together he didn’t ask any questions when she tried seducing him. It also helped that their relationship got closer again after her fight with Gene when he came back early from his trip. When he found her in their bedroom later that day after she wrecked the living room and left him standing there they had a long talk and he listened when she told him about Gene having to be replaced on Easter Parade … She didn’t tell him about what else went on with them and he didn’t ask any further questions, about which she was grateful. Whatever he thought, it didn’t seem like he even wanted to know it all - knowing that Gene would be out of the picture seemed to be enough for him and he hoped it would mean that everything might finally return back to normal.  
She had been so certain about wanting to keep this baby but ever since she saw the results she realized more and more how naive that wish had been. There was just so much to worry about; what this would mean for her work and how the studio would react; what Vincente’s reaction would be and whether she should tell him the truth; but most of all what this would mean for Gene and her. Ironically enough it felt like keeping this baby would only separate them more. She wanted to tell him so badly … In an ideal world they would be together now but at the moment they were as far away from that as humanly possible … So what would be the use in telling him?  
After a while Judy reached for the plug to drain the water and got out of the tub before putting on the cozy bathrobe. She let it hang open as she looked at herself in the mirror, testing out different angles. Obviously there wasn’t anything to see yet but knowing for sure now made it so real all of the sudden. Judy let her hands run over her belly as tears started welling up in her eyes. In her mind she knew that she had to, but the thought of losing the baby almost broke her apart. The whole situation just completely overwhelmed her. If she didn’t talk about this to someone soon she felt like she would lose her mind.

There was a sudden knock at the door and Judy quickly tied her robe before she attempted wiping her tears away.

“Yes?”

Vincente’s head peeked through the door.

“May I come in?”

“Mhm.”

He came inside and sat down on the edge of the bathtub.

“Feeling better?”

“Yeah, but I still think I might try to go to sleep early today.”

Judy knew she wouldn’t be able to but she just wasn’t in the mood for another evening of smalltalk.

“I was just on the phone with Arthur …”

“And …”

“There will be more retakes.”

She had to laugh to herself, just like she thought, there was no surprise.

“Voodoo?”

“Yeah … They deemed it as too sexual.”

“What was the first version then?” Judy provocatively asked.

“Judy.”

“No, why did we try and tone it down in the first place when all they do is take it out anyway?”

“Well, the second version didn’t make much of a difference so you can’t really blame them, can you?”

He stood up and Judy turned around, trying to avoid his eyes, but he came up behind her as she tried fixing her hair in the mirror.

“It’s the truth, you two looked like you were on the brink of doing it right there on the floor … and you know it too.” He said, his voice silent all of the sudden.

Judy was starting to get very annoyed as he painfully reminded her about what lay in the past.

“Well, I’m glad that came across. That was the whole point of the choreography.”

“Yeah, well seems to have inspired you two quite a bit, since you continued acting it out away from the set so very well.”

“Please Vincente, would you stop that already?! Besides, I’m not the only one who strayed. So don’t you dare give me a lecture about what’s right and wrong.”

“I thought we were done with that.”

He looked down, ashamed.

“Yeah that’s what I thought, but since you’ve decided to bring it up again I might as well follow your lead.”

The glare she gave him told him she was not to be messed with today.

“Fine, forget about it.”

“Good. And I don’t wanna talk about this again, Vincente, so I’d appreciate it if you left Gene alone once and for all.”

Her voice was so determined that Vincente was rendered a little speechless. Judy let out a deep sigh before she spoke again. She needed to change the subject.

“What glorious idea have they come up with in their little minds then?”

“What?”

“About the retakes. How do they wanna replace it?”

“Oh … Mack The Black.”

Judy gave him a quizzical look.

“But that’s in the opening scene. How’s that gonna work?”

“There will be some adjustments there as well … it needs to be redone. They’re moving the whole number, it will be filmed on the show tent set to replace Voodoo and there’s gonna be a new choreography. Gene won’t be able to dance just yet but he will be involved nevertheless. Kay will be there to help you rehearse for the new arrangement and after recordings are finished they plan on shooting it next month, hoping that Gene will be able to at least walk properly then.”

“Why did we spend so much time shooting this goddamn picture if everything is getting ripped apart in the end anyway?”

Judy darted out of the bathroom and into their bedroom, sitting down on the edge of the bed as Vincente followed her.

“I know it’s frustrating. I tried persuading them to just leave it the way it is but there’s nothing we can do anymore. They won’t cave. We’ll just have to make the most of this now.”

“And what about me? Are they afraid I might be getting bored with just one picture or what?”

He knelt down in front of her and took her hands in his as he looked at her.

“Judy sweetheart, I know it’s very tough for you at the moment but it’s just these two scenes. I’m sure you’ll be done with them in no time - I know how good you are.”

She shrugged, looking down at their hands. All that this meant was extra hours of work and working with Gene again, even if only for a short while. It seemed like he always caught up with her and no matter the circumstances … they were always forced back together again, like magnets. Judy took a deep breath in, trying to bolster herself up.

“Okay, seems like there’s no other way then.”

He leaned forward to kiss her on the cheek.

“That’s my girl. I’ll put Liza to bed and then I’ll have some more work to do. Why don’t you lie down.”

He stood up, wanting to leave the room but she followed him.

“No, I’ll do it. It feels like I rarely get to see her anymore these days.”

When Judy went into Liza’s room she was sitting on the floor together with the nanny as they were playing. Judy knocked on the doorframe to catch her attention. Liza looked up to her and dropped the block she was holding in her hand before she stood up.

“Mama!”

Judy knelt down, her arms as wide as her smile as she waited for Liza to walk up to her before she caught her in her arms and picked her up, smooching her little cheek.

“I’ll take over from here, thank you.”

“Alright Mrs. Minnelli. See you tomorrow.”

“Yes, see you then. Say bye-bye Liza.” Judy said as she waited for her daughter to tell her nanny goodbye.

“Bye-bye” Liza said as she waved her hand at her, making Judy laugh.

“Bye-bye, sweetie.”

Judy didn’t have the heart to tuck her in right away. Even though she tried her best to spend time with her daughter as much as she could it was never enough for her, so she relished moments like these. It made her so proud and happy to see how much she’d grown already but also very emotional. It seemed like whenever she looked away she had picked up or worked out something new. She wished she could keep her this tiny just a little bit longer. They played for a little while before Liza started rubbing and squinting her eyes. Judy changed Liza’s diaper and put her into her PJs before they got comfortable in the rocking chair together as Judy sang to her. Liza desperately tried keeping her eyes open but during the second song she drifted off to sleep and Judy could feel the small body relax in her arms. They stayed like this for a bit longer as Judy tried taking everything in before she carefully picked her up to lay her into her crib. As she looked down on her sleeping baby she felt herself getting all choked up again as she was painfully reminded that if things were different she would be doing this all over again very soon … if only they were.  
______________

They had already rehearsed it a weak or so ago but today the new version of Mack The Black was due to be recorded. The last week had been quite successful and they managed to shoot a lot of scenes for Easter Parade. It made Judy optimistic that it would stay that way but today she had no idea how on earth she should be able to turn up on set … let alone getting out of bed. She felt absolutely horrendous. She had been lucky with morning sickness this time but today it really got the better of her. She wanted to avoid calling in sick though, she had already done that on the first day of rehearsals for the number and didn’t want to postpone it any longer. The sooner everything would be wrapped up, the better. Luckily the call time was in the afternoon, she prayed she would feel better by then.

Things were better when Judy got to the studio and she was able to rehearse everything a few more times together with Kay before they were joined by Arthur Freed as he wanted to listen to the finished version before they would record it. He was looking at her in anticipation as Kay and him watched her from the recording control room but all of the sudden it seemed like her body just refused to put up with it any longer as the nausea returned. Judy held her pounding head as she took in deep breaths, desperately trying not to throw up all over the recording booth. All she wanted to do at this moment was to lie down, to hell with this goddamn recording.

“Kay?” She managed to get out.

“Yeah?”

“I don’t think I will be able to finish this today.”

“What’s wrong?” She asked as she opened the door and walked up to her, placing one arm around her shoulder.

“I don’t know”, she lied, “I’ve been feeling sick all morning, then it got better, but now … I don’t think I can go on.”

“Here sit down.” She uttered as she dragged a chair behind Judy and pushed her down a little so she would sit. “Let me get you a glass of water, hun, I’ll be right back.”

Arthur came inside with a caring look on his face and sat down beside her as he placed his hand on her shoulder.

“You okay dear?”

“I feel really dizzy, I think I might have a temperature.”

Arthur reached up to place the back of his hand against her forehead.

“You feel a little warm … I think it might be better to call a doctor, just to make sure. I wouldn’t wanna see my best girl get ill.”

“No no no, I don’t think that will be necessary … I guess it was just all a little much with Easter Parade and now the retakes … I just need to rest a bit, I will be all better tomorrow.” Judy felt a rush of panic moving through her as she tried talking him out of it. A doctor was the last person she wanted to see now. But Arthur couldn’t be deterred.

“No, we’ll have that checked.”

He was already halfway out of the recording studio when Kay returned.

“Kay, will you accompany Judy back to her dressing room, I want the doctor to take a look at her.”

“Alright.”

As Kay handed Judy the glass of water she saw a look of panic in her friend's eyes.

“Why are you looking at me like a scared chicken?”

“I don’t _need_ a doctor, Kay.”

“Come on, he’ll just take a look at you, maybe it will be for the better. Besides, I think Arthur’s mind was quite made up, he’s probably on the phone already.”

“Yeah, but …”

“Judy what’s the big deal?”

Judy looked like she held something back that was just waiting to burst out of her but in the last moment she swallowed it back down, waving her hand she said,

“Nothing.”

Kay just gave her an irritated look but decided to wait with her interrogation until later.

“Okay then … Think you can walk back to your room?”

“Mhm.”

Judy inhaled deeply after she stood up, trying to breath her nausea away. She tucked her arm into Kay’s as they walked back to her dressing room together.  
To her relief the doctor didn’t cause her any more trouble. Even though he couldn’t detect a heightened temperature … well, obviously … he wasn’t too inquisitive and didn’t ask any further questions as he simply explained her dizziness to himself as signs of exhaustion. He advised that it would be best for her not to work for the rest of the day nor the following and sent her home right away. After the doctor had left Kay stood up.

“I’ll be right back, I’ll just go and tell Arthur about the change of plans.”

Judy could see the piercing look she gave her and tried avoiding her eyes.

“Mhm.”

“I’ll drive you back home after.”

“No that’s okay, I think I’ll manage.”

“That wasn’t a question.”

Judy sighed in defeat and stood up, gathering her stuff together.

“I’ll wait outside then. Maybe the air will help a little.”

“Alright, meet you there.”

Kay returned just a few minutes later. Judy had tried walking the nausea away, taking in deep breaths as she walked around the parking lot but it hadn’t helped much and the movements of the car undid any improvements. Judy clenched her hands as she held onto her seat, trying to concentrate. She could feel Kay looking over to her at every opportunity, but she didn’t say anything which distracted Judy even more.

“Will you stop staring at me like that already? I need to focus, or do you want me to throw up all over your windshield?”

“I could stop …”

“Are you nuts? I can’t throw up right on the street! If anyone sees, it will be all over the papers the next day. They’ll either write that I was piss drunk or that I’m-”, but Judy stopped herself right there. “Just hurry.”

When they finally got to her house Judy got out of the car without another word and ran inside, Kay could only catch a glimpse of her before the downstairs bathroom door was yanked shut behind her. Kay wandered around the hall waiting for her friend and could hear some rattling coming from the kitchen, where the staff were already preparing for dinner. When Judy still hadn’t returned several minutes later she started to get worried and knocked on the bathroom door.

“You okay in there?”

Nothing but silence followed but after a few seconds the door opened very slowly, revealing a very pale looking Judy.

“Gosh, you look dreadful.”

“Why thanks … Oh dear what’s that smell?” Judy said, covering her nose with her hand.

“Come, you should lie down.”

Kay put her arm around her and led her upstairs. Feeling very relieved Judy sank down on her bed with a deep sigh.

“Do you need anything else?”

“Thanks for your help Kay, but I think I’ll manage from here … I’m just gonna go to sleep.”

“Sounds very unlike you.” Kay mumbled to herself.

Judy was already pulling the covers over her head but Kay walked up to her and pulled them back down.

“What are you doing?”

“We’re not done here.”

“Well excuse me but I am.” Judy replied and buried her face in the sheets.

Kay sat down next to her on the bed, taking in a deep breath.

“So. How far along are you?”

Judy’s body became all rigid. She had been dreading this question. She had been wanting to talk about this to someone but now that the opportunity presented itself she didn’t know what to say. It meant not being able to push it to the back of her mind any longer and the uncertainty that came along with all the chaos suddenly took over, making her want to stay wrapped in the cozy softness of her bed forever.

“Judy!”

Kay became impatient, making Judy muffle her answer into the blanket.

“I didn’t catch that.”

Judy sat up a little, though still not facing Kay.

“About eight weeks.” She admitted while nervously picking at her fingers.

“Oh dear … Does Vincente know?”

“No, I haven’t told him yet.”

Kay leaned forward a little, reaching for her hand.

“Does the father know?”

Judy looked at her anxiously and shook her head no as the tears in her eyes welled over.

“Is it Gene’s?”

Judy only nodded, placing her head over her mouth.

“Oh, Kay.” She cried as she broke down into her friend's arms.

It took her quite some time but eventually she calmed herself and laid back, letting her head rest against the headboard.

“How did you know?” She asked, sniffing her nose.

“Just a wild guess.”

Judy shot her a look.

“I figured something was going on between the two of you for the longest time … Why did you never tell me about it?”

“It started back in summer … it was such a mess though. It was on and off and then on again but I feel like it’s off for good now … I drove him away.”

“What happened?”

“… We had this huge fight two months ago, after we …”, She pointed at her belly, “well you know … It was so wonderful, but after … we got into this huge argument about our situation and his wife and we both said some things we didn’t mean … I told him to leave and he did. He called me and tried talking to me a few weeks after that but I was so stressed out about work … I didn’t even give him the chance to say what he wanted to … We haven’t seen each other since. I totally blew it.” Judy looked down in defeat, her tears starting to fall again.

“Judy, you really should tell him about this.”

“What good would that do?” She desperately cried out. “I can’t have it anyway!”

“Judy that’s not true.”

“Yes it is. What will the studio say? Or Vincente if he finds out it’s Gene’s?”

“Oh, to hell with all of them! They’re just gonna have to suck it up!”

Kay thought for a moment. “What do you mean ‘if he finds out it’s Gene’s’?”

“I went to bed with him when I started noticing something’s off.”

“Oh Judy …”

“I really wanted to have it then and I figured this would be the only way … but now it seems like there’s just no way at all.”

“Honey, do you want to have this baby?”

Judy shrugged as her lip began to quiver again.

“Since when does it matter what I want.”

“Please just answer me.”

“Sure I do … and I don’t wanna go through all of this again.”

“Think about it darling. You shouldn’t spend your life like this. And I know you’re not happy with Vincente … Maybe this could be your chance.”

“No, all it means is that I have to stay with him … I know that.”

Kay took her hands in hers, looking at her intently.

“Talk to them. To both of them. They both love you, you know. You can’t lose here honey.”

“I already did.”

Kay knew who Judy was talking about.

“No. He might be stubborn as hell but that man is crazy about you, he’ll come around. But don’t cut him out Judy."

Judy let out a deep sigh.

“This is such a goddamn mess, isn’t it?”

“Yeah, but a sweet one.” Kay smiled at her and Judy couldn’t help but reciprocate it.

“But to hell with all of these men, how have you been?”

“Oh all over the place. I’m just glad that I haven’t had much trouble with nausea yet … today might not have been a good example. But everything else is just too overwhelming … and I know that time is running out - I’ll have to make a decision soon.”

“And that’s why you should take my advice.”

“Oh Kay, I don’t think I can do it.”

“Well you’re gonna see him again next week anyway. Might at least try.”

Judy let out a deep sigh.

“Alright then, I’ll try if it makes you happy.”

“This isn’t about me, it’s about you, about making you happy. And about doing the right thing.”

“Okay.”

Kay squeezed her hand reassuringly before she got off of the bed.

“Do you want me to stay? I kinda need to get back but I guess I could just tell them to shove it.”

Judy had to giggle. “No, that’s alright, I feel a little better, I actually might try and sleep a bit.”

Kay bent down to kiss her cheek.

“Call me anytime, alright? I’ll be there and kick anyone’s ass that tries to mess with you.”

Judy giggled a little, she felt lighter already.

“I’ll hold you to that.”

“See you Monday then. But please try not to stress about it too much. You’re way more important than some stupid film.”

“Promise.”

Kay smiled at her, hoping that she’d made a small difference.

“Bye hun.”

______________

It wasn’t very spacious but it would be enough for now. And after all he didn’t need much. At least it was something of his own. He wandered through the hall and from the living room into the kitchen … So much silence. There had been silence at home the last couple of weeks too but it was tinged with a tangible tension which made it less enjoyable. Betsy wasn’t happy when she came home and saw his condition. They had talked and agreed that they would go on a trial separation when his foot would be better but they knew it was in fact just sugarcoating it. Both of them had a feeling that it would be permanent.  
In the weeks that followed they tried to avoid being around each other and keeping the inevitable arguing to a minimum - they had to remain civil for Kerry. That was the only part about leaving that almost seemed unbearable to him. They had tried explaining it to her as good as they could but she had the hardest time seeing him leave. He still saw her every day he could though - it was important to Betsy and him that she would suffer from their situation as little as possible.  
But now that Judy didn’t want anything to do with him anymore he had the hardest time understanding why he'd left in the first place and he had to remind himself that this wasn’t just about her. It would have happened either way, of that he was certain.  
He followed Frank’s advice and tried talking to Judy once again. He wanted to explain everything to her but she wouldn’t listen. He could tell he’d caught her at the wrong moment and that she was very burnt out from work but still it frustrated the hell out of him … he said some things that he didn’t mean and just stormed out. He didn’t even get the chance to tell her what happened with Betsy and that they would separate.  
And tomorrow they would start rehearsals and he would see her again. Gene sat down on the edge of the bed and let his body fall backwards. Just thoughts of her were enough to bring back every little sensation he’d experienced with her. Missing her filled him with a hollowness he never knew. And even though she drove him to the brink of insanity he knew that if she stood in front of him right now everything would be forgotten, every tinge of anger and desperation he felt would be gone. There wasn’t anything she could say or do that would ever make him stop loving her. It frustrated the hell out of him but she had a hold of him that he wouldn’t be able to break even if he wanted to. She had sucked him in with her charm, wit, beauty and everything that she was and she wouldn’t let him go and he didn't want her to. He loved her and needed her but he was also so hurt that she seemed to have no interest in their relationship anymore. And he honestly had no clue why she would shut him out like this all of the sudden. Sure she had been angry but there must have be something else … It just seemed so unlike her when everything she wanted was to be with him just a few months ago.

Rehearsals turned out to be exhausting … not physically though. It frustrated him that they couldn’t have left everything the way it was and honestly he couldn’t understand it. Yes it was quite an erotic number but after all that was the whole purpose of the picture: To show the development of a pure, innocent girl into a grown woman, becoming aware of her desires. The Voodoo choreography only was there to emphasize the peak of that. But now it wouldn’t make much sense anymore. And he didn’t even get the chance to really be in the new number because he wasn’t allowed to dance properly yet and it had to be attuned to that.  
On top of this he could see that Judy wasn’t her normal self. It made him feel so helpless. She got through the day but he could tell that she was struggling and not being able to concentrate for long. And worst of all she still was trying to avoid him. When rehearsals were over and people were starting to leave he pulled her to the side to talk.

“What do you want, Gene?”

“Judy you’ve got to pull yourself together.”

“Don’t you tell me what to do. I’m trying here.”

“Well it doesn’t seem to be enough.”

Judy didn’t want another fight but she couldn’t ignore his harsh words. She stepped closer until her face was just inches away from his, but he didn’t back away. Better yet, he seemed to be rather pleased with himself that he had been able to tickle some sort of emotion out of her.

“You arrogant, conceited son of a bitch.”

“Go on.”

“I’m so sick of you making others feel guilty because they’re not working their asses off all of the time like you do. Some people have bad days, you know.”

“Oh, that’s what you think about me?”

“Yes.”

“Looks like you got me all figured out then.”

“You bet your ass I have.”

She wanted to turn around and leave but he wasn’t done yet.

“Good to know how fast you change your mind.”

“Ha, you’re one to talk.”

“I didn’t.”

“Please.”

“I moved out, Judy.”

“What?”

“Betsy and I aren’t living together anymore.”

“What do you mean?”

Judy felt like someone had pulled the rug out from under her feet.

“Exactly that. I’ve been trying to tell you weeks ago but you wouldn’t listen to me and after that you did nothing. It was like I didn’t even exist to you anymore.”

“You’re not living together anymore?”

She was still completely baffled.

“No. When I came home after we … well she’d left a letter for me, basically telling me it was over and that she would be away for a week. I got out just a few days ago when my foot had healed enough … Look, this is not how I wanted this to happen. I wanted to show you how important you are to me myself but … fuck, does it really matter how it came about?”

“Gene I, I don’t know what to say.”

“Don’t. It wouldn’t make any difference now. It was pretty clear that you don’t wanna see me anymore, I got the message.”

“No, Gene listen to me, I-”

“No Judy. I don’t wanna hear it right now. And you know what? I’m tired of it - all of these ups and downs. I don’t wanna do it. Make up your mind before you talk to me again. I don’t wanna be tossed around anymore.”

Hearing him talk to her like that made her speechless, he had never done that before.

“I just hope we can pull ourselves together for these last few days and get this over with.”

A slap across the face wouldn’t have felt much different. Judy sat down as she felt all colour drifting from her face - she was sick to her stomach at his choice of words.

“Get this over with …” Her sad voice and the fact that she didn’t throw a snappy comment in his face showed Gene how much he’d hurt her.

“You know what I mean.”

“Yes, yes as a matter of fact it’s starting to get much clearer now.”

The disappointment in her eyes couldn’t be overlooked.

“I gotta go.”

She got off the chair a little too quickly. Suddenly she felt all dizzy and tumbled a little before she bumped against his chest. He caught her and held her against him. She caught a whiff of his scent and could feel herself wanting to stay there, but his hurtful words still hung in the air.

“Judy what’s wrong?”

She came back to her senses and freed herself from his hold.

“Nothing, I’m fine. It’s just … been a long day.”

“Darling please -”

She saw true concern in his eyes but hearing him use that name now only made her more furious.

“Oh, don’t you dare call me that anymore!” She snapped at him, making him take a step backwards.

He ignored her though. At the moment all that mattered to him was that she was okay … he already regretted not wanting to listen to her and wished he had just pushed his ego to the side.

“Do you want to sit down for a moment?”

“No, all I want to do is get out of here.”

She stormed past him without another word and left him standing in the empty rehearsal hall. He contemplated just letting her be and he probably should but there was some force in him that always seemed to move him to her. But most of all he needed to make sure that she would be okay. Her dizziness alarmed him a bit. Gene followed her outside, hoping that she would still be there. He found her just outside the lot, holding a cigarette and approached her carefully.

“I thought you wanted to go.”

“I did. I wanted to get away from you.”

“Feeling better?”

“For God’s sake yes! Don’t you have someplace else to be?”

Gene had to stifle a smile.

“No. Actually I don’t.” He said, making Judy remember what he’d just told her.

“Well, see you tomorrow then.” She mumbled, before she grinded her cigarette on the ground and started to walk away but he followed suit.

“How are you getting home?”

“I got my car here. I might just stay though, seeing as I practically live here again.”

“Will you let me drive you?

She stopped and gave him a puzzled look.

“Why should I?”

“Because I want you to get home okay and you’re not feeling well.”

The genuine concern in his eyes touched her and she knew that everything he said earlier was just out of frustration but she was hurt nevertheless.

“I’m fine.” She said, trying to avoid his eyes.

“I won’t leave.”

“Gosh, you’re a pain! … Okay then, but don’t you think you’ll get anything out of me now since you didn’t care to listen to me just a moment ago.”

“Fair enough."

The ride over to her house was silent as promised but it wasn't uncomfortable, even with everything that went on before. By the time they got there Judy’s temper had settled a bit, but she still wanted to get out of there as soon as possible.

“Thanks for the ride. See you tomorrow.”

“Wait.”

She looked at him grudgingly.

“I’m truly sorry for what I said Judy, or the way I said it.”

“It’s the truth. We should just get it over with. After all there’s only two more days left.”

“I didn’t mean to hurt you though … it’s just, God, will you ever make up your mind about us?

“I did. I had it all figured out Gene, but-”

She didn’t know how to continue. This wasn’t the right moment … but then again, would there ever be a right moment?

“But what Judy? Can’t you understand how frustrating that is? I left my family for you but it still didn’t help anything.”

The tone in his voice told her that she was right - this definitely was the wrong moment.

“Don’t you blame me for this Gene. I’ve got enough to deal with already. I gotta go.”

She was out the door before Gene could react, but the tears that started to form in her eyes as she left told him that there was something beyond insecurity that was troubling her.

______________

This would be their last scene together and he was determined to make the most of it.  
He knew he had to stay in character but he couldn’t help but be completely in awe as he looked at her standing in front of him. She looked absolutely beautiful. Her eyes softly closed, her mouth hanging open a little making her lips look so plump, the flush that covered her face and chest, her hardened nipples that were very noticeable through her white leotard.  
He could see her lashes fluttering against her cheeks as she felt him getting closer. He didn’t know whether he did it on purpose or not but he didn’t seem to be able to hold back. He was so hungry for her, he just wanted to taste her again.  
Judy didn’t even know what to think, her mind had drifted off, the only thing she could do was feel. Feel his fingers brushing her breast as she felt his tongue slightly flicking against her lips. She wanted to moan into his mouth and couldn’t help a slight whimper escape her as his lips touched hers. Oh, how desperately she had longed for him. He pulled her closer as his arms moved around her waist while she let her fingers run over his muscular arms until they found his strong neck. When he felt her responding to him he opened his mouth almost desperately as their tongues began a tantalizing dance she could only hope the camera wouldn’t pick up. She needed to feel more of him and stepped into him further, grinding her hips against him as she did so. When she felt him shiver underneath her fingertips she wanted to cry from all the emotions roaring through her and wished for the kiss to go on and on but suddenly she heard someone yell cut. She almost forgot what that word meant, she just wanted to stay there but she felt Gene parting from her lips and stepping away from her. They both couldn’t help but gaze at each other in wonder. She wanted to move but couldn’t. It was really over now. This was their last scene. They did it once before but he did not kiss her like this then. Vincente had wanted another take of it and thank God that he did. She could still feel her lips tingling.

“Yes, that was better, I think we got it.”

Only now Judy realized it was her husband talking to her.

“Judy?”

She turned around to face him.

“Hm?”

“That was better, we’re done.”

“Okay great.” She tried keeping a straight face.

Stealing a look over her shoulder she saw that Gene was talking to someone. That was her chance to get away unnoticed. Vincente’s attention was already somewhere else, as he was speaking to the camera man. Even better, that way she wouldn’t be missed.

“I just need to get something from my dressing room. Meet you outside in a couple of minutes, alright?” She mumbled into Vincente’s ear.

“Sure.”

Walking off the set Judy saw his searching look for her but before Gene could spot her she had already snuck off the sound stage.

When she finally got to her trailer she quickly shut the door behind her and fell onto her daybed. Immediately the tears started welling up in her eyes as the adrenaline from before wore off. This kiss had brought everything back. She wanted to be with him so so bad but she couldn’t see how that would be possible with the situation as it was now. It killed her.  
Only a few minutes later there was a knock at the door, she figured it would be Vincente wanting to pick her up. Checking her face in the mirror she tried wiping her tears away.

“It’s open.”

She shouldn’t have even bothered with the tears, they all came back as a stifled sob escaped her lips when she saw Gene standing in the door frame, his eyes mirroring her pain. He shut the door without a word and stepped closer to her.

“I’m not ready for us to part again.”

“Why did you do that?”

“What?”

“That Kiss.”

“I was supposed to.” Gene plainly stated.

“Not like that you weren’t! Only two days ago you were all cold and didn’t even want to talk to me anymore and now you shove your tongue into my mouth again? Let’s just hope it gets past the censors this time. What am I supposed to make of this Gene?” She’d talked herself in quite a rage.

“Now you’re one to talk. You’re the one who’s been playing hot and cold with me the whole time. I was just disappointed and frustrated because you were ignoring me all of these weeks. It doesn’t mean that my feelings for you have changed. Because they haven’t! I ache for you Judy, so fucking much. That’s why I had to kiss you like that.”

His words hit Judy at her core as it was exactly what she felt. She couldn’t keep her lip from quivering as tears streamed down her face again. Immediately he took her hands in his and tried catching her eyes but she escaped his look.

“Judy, what is it? Please, just talk to me.”

She knotted her face and he could practically see the pain roaring through her. He knew at that moment that this was about much more than just the kiss, whatever it was he needed to find out.

“Gene, I … not here … now is not the time to talk.” She finally got out.

“Maybe it should be.”

But she only shook her head no.

“Baby I can’t bear seeing you like this anymore. Let me help you.”

“No.”

“Don’t shut me out like this. There’s something you’re not telling me.” He seemed almost desperate now.

He put his arms around her waist and for a moment she let him as her sobs got more intense but she quickly came back to reality and took his hands from her.

“I can’t do this right now, Gene. I’m sorry, I -”

He cradled her face, so she had to look at him.

“Darling I love you so much. Please let me help you.”

“I can’t be with you right now, Gene … I can’t. Please don’t make this harder on me.”

She moved away from him and grabbed her bag, wanting to get out of the door as fast as possible.

“Stop running away from me Judy.”

She could see he was on the verge of crying himself but there wasn’t enough time for a long conversation now.

“I’m sorry. I gotta go.”

Leaving him in her room she started walking away.

He didn’t want her to get away again, they needed to sort this out once and for all but when he got outside and saw Vincente walking up to her he didn’t feel it was right to intervene. He hated the feeling of being stuck like this, it made him want to scream.

Judy turned around and saw him standing there as she walked off with Vincente and could see the torment in his eyes. It broke her to see him like that and she had to try very hard to keep a straight face as Vincente and her walked back to the car. He seemed to sense her tension, as he took her hand but luckily he didn’t say anything - she would have just burst into tears again.  
Keeping this baby would inevitably mean that she had to keep Gene at a distance … there’d be no way for them to be together for the longest time, no matter what Kay tried making her believe. Not to mention the pressure that the studio would inflict on her … she was sure that they wouldn’t be crazy about letting her go for so long once again after only such a short period of time. If everything is so complicated already how would it be like if the baby is actually here? Here anxiety about that was enough to make her almost sick. She had wanted to make it work so desperately but she also needed some clarity back in her life or else she would surely go insane. The only way to get that was to have another abortion. She loved this baby so much already but she saw no other way anymore … it was inevitable.

______________

The place was already buzzing with people when he got there, Gene couldn’t say that he was surprised. After all it was Frank’s New Year’s Eve party and another quiet night was the last thing he needed. Christmas with Betsy had put him under a strain. It had been wonderful seeing a happy Kerry again but besides that it had been a nerve wrecking event. He figured it would take some more time before things between them would settle into some kind of a normality. So needless to say he was ready for a night of fun. He felt like he had to at least try to start the new year off right.

Judy was sitting on the piano stool next to Roger, singing a song as an instant tingling feeling coursed through her when she saw him entering the room. She had felt his presence before she really saw him. He filled the room so effortlessly and looked so handsome that she had trouble remembering the next line. She felt him stealing glances at her as he talked to Van but she tried bringing her attention back to the song. In the back of her mind she knew that she had hoped he would be there too when Frank invited her to come. Vincente had been invited as well but told her lastminute that he wouldn’t be able to come along since he didn’t feel too well. She had to say she felt kind of relieved about it now.

Frank said she wouldn’t be here. It was one of the reasons why he had agreed to come. He knew that things between them were still up in the air. After she left him standing there again he had felt so helpless. He thought he couldn’t bear being around her for a while. But now the thing that was troubling him most was keeping his eyes from trailing over her body as he talked to Van. She looked absolutely stunning in her white strapless dress.  
Just as she hit the last note their eyes locked and he could see the uncertainty but also pent up desire in them. He wanted to walk over to her but when he caught a glimpse of a very cheerful Frank walking past him he jumped at the chance to confront him and took hold of his shoulder.

“Not so fast.”

“Hey buddy, glad you could make it.”

“I thought you said she wouldn’t be here.”

“She wasn’t.”

“But?”

“But then I invited her.” His lips curled into a smirk “You’re welcome.”

“You’re such a dick.”

But Frank ignored him and turned his head to the side to look at her.

“She looks absolutely gorgeous tonight, doesn’t she?”

The way Frank’s eyes drifted over her body made him want to punch him immediately, but he tried keeping it cool.

“She does.”

“I can kinda see where you’re coming from.”

“Stop it, man.”

“Come on, you know what I mean. You should see your face right now … You’re still not over her, right?”

But Gene didn’t even get the chance to answer as Frank reached out his hand to Judy as she was walking up to him.

“Oh and there she is … Hey doll, we were just talking about you.”

He placed his arm around her and kissed her cheek. Judy darted a nervous look at Gene.

“Oh, were you?” She said while her hand rest comfortably rested on Frank’s chest.

“Well, Frank was.” Gene said, making her eyes lock with his.

“Darling, we haven’t had a chance to catch up all night.” Frank tried to get her attention back.

“I know, I’ve been kinda busy with all the singing.”

The smile she gave him made Gene want to be sick, he had to get away from them.

“If you’ll excuse me, talk to you later Frank.”

Besides some glances every now and then they spent the party away from each other. She was clearly avoiding him. But despite his previous intentions Gene didn’t want to let the year end like this. Things between them had been so different just a couple of months ago and it made him pretty miserable to think that the new year would start off with them not being with each other, let alone talk to each other. Worst of all he still hadn’t figured out what it was that created all of this distance between them and troubled her so. He wished she would just talk to him, he just wanted to understand it.

As the night went on Gene retreated to the bar in defeat, talking to Peter. It wasn’t long until midnight now and he just wanted to drown his dark thoughts in a few drinks. He could barely listen to Peter talking as his eyes kept wandering off to the dance floor where he saw Judy dancing with Frank. They seemed to be completely at ease with each other, he even managed to get a few laughs out of her as he was twirling her around the dance floor.  
He knew Frank was his friend and had just been teasing him before because he wanted to get a reaction out of him but seeing them acting in such a familiar way really got to him. He knew he wasn’t interested in her in that way but he couldn’t help a feeling jealousy rising up in him.

“Sorry Peter, I’ll be right back.”

“Sure, man.”

He needed to get away from the sight of them.

Judy was twirled around the dance floor by Frank and it made her let loose a little. She was very thankful to him. She knew he could tell she’d been in kind of a bad mood and wanted to make her feel better. She loved him dearly as a friend and appreciated that he was always able to get her out of a rut so effortlessly. Maybe it was because she didn’t really see him in that way - it made things less complicated.

“Judy?”

She was a little startled when he started to speak.

“Yeah?”

“Look, I don’t know what Gene did, but don’t you think you should talk to him once more? He looks so miserable there on his barstool. Then again, he’s probably just thinking about punching my face right now.”

Judy just looked at him with wide eyes.

“What?”

“He kinda told me about the two of you.”

She leaned her cheek back against his, wanting to escape his amused grin.

“Oh dear …”

“So … will you?”

“I’ll think about it.”

When the song came to an end Frank stepped away from her a little as his eyes seemed to fixate on something at the other side of the room.

“I’m sorry but I’m afraid I have to leave you.”

She tried to hold onto his hands, not letting him get away so easily.

“Already? Come on, I just wanna dance a little while longer. I don’t wanna be alone at midnight.”

“Oh, I don’t think there will be a problem there.”

He seemed pretty happy as he looked over her shoulder.

“Hey Gene!” He shouted.

Gene turned around, a little confused.

“Would you mind taking over for me? I’m afraid this lady here is not quite satisfied yet and my feet are getting a little sore.” Frank winked at him before he turned around without another word, leaving him with Judy. She wanted to shout something at Frank but he was already gone.

Gene could see what he was doing and had to stifle a smile. It was a relief to him that he hadn’t been wrong about his friend. Judy gazed down almost shyly as he took a step closer to her. Holding out his hands he asked,

“May I?”

She looked up at him and let him take her in his arms. She felt so light in his arms as he led her over the dancefloor so effortlessly and he could feel the tension in her back disappearing as they got more and more in tune with each other. But she still wanted to confront him about Frank.

“Why did you tell him about us?”

The muscles in his back tensed up a bit as he let out a deep breath.

“I sorta had to … He drove me to your house after you hung up on me and wouldn’t pick up the phone again.”

She leaned back so she was able to look at him.

“You came to my house?”

“Yes … but then Vincente came back and … well it didn’t feel like it would be the right time.”

“I had no idea.”

“How could you. You never listened to me.”

There wasn’t a hint of accusation in his voice, just a deep sadness. A feeling of shame came over her at the thought of how she’d treated him. He had fought so hard for her, even when there was nothing but setbacks.

She stepped back a little as the song ended and a much slower one started to play.

“What are you doing?”

“I thought you might wanna stop.”

But he only shook his head no and pulled her in again, much closer than before as he enveloped her in his arms. She swallowed hard as his hands wandered over her back and she felt his breath against her skin, making her shudder a bit.

“Are you feeling better?”

A feeling of guilt took hold of her as she remembered how their last conversation went and how she’d left him standing there.

“I’m very sorry Gene.”

“It doesn’t matter now, darling. I just wanna know that you’re okay.”

Gene could feel her starting to get all choked up and knew that she was not but decided to let it lie for the moment. She wasn’t ready for it and he needed to accept that for now. He was just glad that she’d let him hold her and didn’t run away. He kissed her cheek softly and felt her relax against him as he slowly stroked her back.

“I missed feeling you so much, baby.” He whispered and kissed her temple, letting his lips linger there.

“I miss you every day.” She admitted.

Fortunately everyone was having a good time and so caught up with themselves that they didn’t notice how closely they were dancing together. And Judy wasn’t even sure if she would have cared if they did. She was completely lost in his arms. And if that wasn’t enough the thought of their baby nestled between them made her heart want to explode with love - it was such an intensely intimate moment for her. But it also showed her how torn she still felt about all of this … and she had thought her mind was so made up.  
They hardly noticed the song coming to an end and only realized it when everyone started counting back from 10, awaiting to welcome the new year.  
He stepped away from her a little but kept his arms around her, seeing the desperate gaze in her eyes, as she looked up at him. It seemed like she didn’t want it to end. She joined the countdown.

“Three”

“Two”, he added.

“One”, she finished.

He had only meant to place a small peck on her lips but he just couldn’t bring himself to pull back once his lips touched hers. Her plump and inviting lips felt oh so good. When she opened her lips against his he knew he had to stop them but there was no way. Their tongues found each other immediately and his fingers wove into her hair to angle her face perfectly for him as their kiss only got more and more sexually charged, making her whimper inside his mouth before she only kissed him harder. It had been too long since he felt her respond in that way and he didn't want to let go of her now.  
When Gene felt a hand on his back he wanted to shove it off but eventually came back to his senses as it started hitting him a little, making him pull back eventually. Judy let her fingers run over her lips and looked at him in shock as she saw who was standing behind Gene.

“Excuse me.” She mumbled, storming off the dance floor.

Gene turned around and saw Frank standing behind him, giving him an astonished look.

“Saved your ass .. what was that dude? I mean I was hoping it would be a success but … Jeez!”

“Nothing …” His eyes wandered around the room in an attempt to find Judy.

“Come on, if I hadn’t stopped you, you would’ve taken her right here on the floor.”

“Frank, now is not the time! Did you see where she went?”

Judy made her way through the crowd, she needed to get away from everyone. It only got to her now what they had done … and for everyone to see. She ran upstairs into one of the empty guest bedrooms. She shut the door and let her body rest against it for a moment. Tears ran down her cheeks and she sank down to the floor. It was all too much. She just wanted to tell him everything and for everything to work out. All the stuff that she tried making herself believe was utter bullshit, she wanted this baby so much. She placed her hands on her belly protectively, practically shaking now. She was so sick of wanting to please everyone.

“Judy are you in there?”

June’s faint voice on the other side of the door brought her back.

“Would you open the door for me?”

And though she didn’t want to see anybody she slowly got off the floor and opened the door. June looked at her compassionately and reached for her hands.

“Did you see?”

“Yes.”

Judy walked further inside and sat down on the bed, burying her face in her hands. June sat down next and placed her hand on her shoulder for comfort.

“Has this been going on for longer?”

“Oh … it’s been up and down.”

“Do you wanna talk about it?”

“Yes, but I can’t.” Judy cried, making her tears start all over again.

“Maybe it would make you feel better.”

“It doesn’t matter how I feel … I just gotta get through this.”

“Through what?” June was visibly confused.

“Oh June, it’s just terrible.”

“What is?”

Judy felt so torn, she couldn’t tell another person but the decision was made for her when the door opened without a warning, startling them both a bit. Gene stood there.

“What are you doing here?”

“I need to speak to you.”

“Can’t you see I’m kinda busy already?”

But he ignored her.

“June, would you please leave us for a moment? I gotta talk to Judy in private.”

June got off the bed but turned to her once more before she left the room.

“Judy you can talk to me anytime, alright? Remember that.”

Gene waited for her to leave before he got inside, shutting the door behind him.

“How dare you? I don’t need another person deciding things over my head.”

“I’m sorry Judy but this is important. You can’t keep running away from me.”

He walked up to her and knelt down in front of the bed.

“Judy what happened there?”

“You’re asking me? Felt like I wasn’t the only one involved in the kiss.”

“I’m not saying that, but why now? What about the other times? Why did you shut me out like this and wouldn’t even talk to me anymore literally overnight?”

“Because …” But she swallowed the words down again.

“Judy I can’t bear to see you cry anymore. I will not just stand by and watch you like this.”

He reached for her hand as he stood up.

“Come with me.”

“Where?”

“My place.”

“No.”

She knew there would be no excuses anymore when they would be all alone. And if she was honest with herself she was utterly terrified of how he would react when he found out.

“Yes Judy, we’re leaving and you’re coming with me. Now.”

The sternness of his voice told her that any further protest would only be unsuccessful. He tugged on her hand and she let him guide her out of the room and downstairs. They walked through the crowds of people and he couldn’t tell if they noticed them leaving but it didn’t matter - he needed to sort this out.

Holding open the passenger’s side he waited for her to get into his car. She did so reluctantly but as soon as they were driving she felt kinda relieved that she came along. His presence was enough to make her feel a little more at ease, he always had that power over her. He turned on the radio so she wouldn’t feel pressured to talk, for which she was thankful.

A sense of comfort took hold of her right away when she stepped into his house. It was small and modest but comfy and so very him.

“I’ll be right back, make yourself at home.”

When he came back he found her wandering around the living room, looking at the pictures behind the couch. She turned when she noticed him. He could tell how flustered she was by the way she behaved and it upset him a little … she had never been like that with him. Walking up to her he took her hand and led her to the couch. She let him hold her hands but his penetrating eyes and the fact that he didn’t say anything distracted her.

“I don’t know what you want me to do.”

“I don’t want you to do anything.”

“Then stop looking at me like that! It’s driving me insane.”

“Alright.”

Gene scooted over to the other side of the couch, putting his feet up on the small table in front of him he closed his eyes. Judy knew he was trying to get her to let her guard down and hated to admit that it worked as she tried to stifle a giggle. She reached for one of the pillows sitting next to her and threw it against his head. He looked at her and gave her a warm smile before he shifted and lay down on the couch, holding out his hand to her.

“Get over here already.”

Returning his smile she lay down next to him, letting him take her in his arms. He pulled her leg up over his as he felt her relax against his chest. Just lying there with him helped soothing her and she appreciated that he didn’t urge her to talk this time.  
He didn’t know how long they lay there like this but he must have drifted off for a while. When he opened his eyes again he saw her looking directly at him but there were so many emotions for him to see that it was impossible for him to pin them down.

“Feeling better?” He asked as he cradled her face.

But Judy only shrugged as a tear rolled down her cheek.

“I’m sorry … I can’t help it.”

“Shh, don’t be.”

“I want to talk but I don’t know how to start.”

“What can I do?”

“Ask me something.”

“Why didn’t you wanna be around me anymore?”

“Because I felt like I couldn’t.”

“Does it have something to do with Vincente?”

She shook her head no.

“Judy, what is so terrible?”

“What do you mean?”

“That’s what you said to June, and that you gotta get through this.”

“Were you listening to me?”

“I was looking for you after you ran away, and I heard you … It wasn’t hard to miss.”

“I - oh Gene ...”

She tried to keep it together as she got out of his hold and off the couch. Trying to escape his eyes that seemed to follow her she nervously walked around the room until eventually coming to a halt. Judy took in a deep breath, trying to bundle up all of her courage.

“I’m pregnant, Gene …” She said, almost in a whisper as she finally looked at him.

Her voice was tiny but he heard it loud and clear, contrary to his thoughts. They were all over the place, shouting at him from every angle of his mind, making him unable to respond in the way that he wanted to. Her whole behaviour made sense to him now and he felt like a complete idiot that he hadn’t been able to figure it out by himself - he had been oblivious.

Judy had dreaded this moment for so long and feared what his reaction would look like but whatever she'd thought it would be she hadn’t been prepared for him to say nothing at all. The longer he looked at her the more unbearable the feelings of shame and helplessness that kept rising up in her became. If even he didn’t support her, who would?

“Oh, just forget it.”

Wanting to get away from him she darted out of the room, making him come back to his senses instantly. He reached her before she could grasp the handle of the front door. Taking her hand he turned her around and folded her in his arms.

“Please stay. I’m sorry.”

Feeling his lips almost touching hers and seeing the regret in his eyes, she couldn’t do anything but nod. He leaned in and kissed her softly, making tears well up in her eyes from the pent up pressure that was now relieved. He picked her up in one swift motion and carried her back into the living room before sitting down with her on the couch, tightening his arms around her as she snuggled against his chest, making her sob even more.

“Shh I’m here.”

It took awhile but eventually he could feel the tension in her body drifting away as her breathing became steadier.

“It’s yours by the way.” She mumbled against his chest after a while, making him chuckle.

“Oh, that’s kind of what I thought.”

She shifted a little on his lap and looked up at him, still slightly insecure. He lifted his hand and cradled her face.

“Oh darling … Why did you feel like you couldn’t tell me?”

“I didn’t know what to do … When I found out I felt like there was no way I could keep it but I couldn’t bring myself to … As time went on I saw how much it would complicate everything. I didn’t know what it would mean for my family, my work … us - it was too much to deal with. I have an appointment to … you know … in just a couple of days. But the thought of … having to get rid of it … it breaks my heart Gene. I don’t wanna do it again, but I know that there’s no other way.”

“Again?”

She realized what she had said … he didn’t even know anything about that.

“When I was with David.”

“Oh honey”, he pulled her closer. “Was it when we did the picture?”

“No after … Everything in our marriage just went downhill from there. But it wasn’t just him who didn’t want me to have it. My mother agreed and the studio had the idea that it wasn’t the right time. They just needed me to continue to work. And they won’t be happy about it now either, even if it was Vincente’s.”

“Does he know?”

Judy shook her head.

“Only Kay knows, I sorta had to tell her … I was feeling so sick, I had to leave the studio one day and she drove me home.”

“Darling … you shouldn’t have kept working so hard.”

“There only were a few days when I felt sick but I was able to cover it up pretty well. I was actually feeling quite good most of the time. Seems like we’re a good team.”

The sad smile she gave him as her hand rested on her belly broke his heart. It was obvious that she wanted to have the child and despite every adversity, he did too. He couldn’t imagine asking her to have an abortion and felt sick at the thought that she had been forced to do it before.

“Judy please think about it again. You’re not alone in this. I’ll always be on your side. We will figure this out. Just please don’t shut me out again.”

“Sounds so easy when you say it like this ...”

Her head rested in the crook of his neck again and he kissed her hair.

“I can’t promise you easy but I promise you that I’ll do whatever it takes for the both of you.”

“Gosh, you’re gonna make me cry again.”

“I mean it.”

“Why aren’t you more freaked out about this?”

“Because I know that it’s possible … and because I love you.” He gave her a small peck on the lips before he continued. “I’ll be there to support you either way but promise me that you’ll consider it … it isn’t the only option.”

“What do you think I’ve been doing the whole time?” She wailed desperately before she got off of him and walked up and down the room, nervously wringing her hands.

“Believe me I haven’t done anything else but consider it. I tried looking at it from every possible angle but in the end … this would be crazy. For both of us. It’s just insane. And now you’re turning everything upside down again.”

He walked towards her and tried taking hold of her shoulders, making her look at him.

“Judy, calm down.”

“How can I? … How?”

The frantic look in her eyes made him want to take every bit of burden away from her, it physically hurt him watching her like this. Finally she gave in and let him hold her as she broke down. He lifted her shaking body and carried her into his bedroom before he lay down with her on the bed.

“I’m so cold.”

He pulled the cover over them and brought her closer to him.

“Better?”

“Mhm”

He let her be for a while before he felt like it would be safe for him to speak again. Cradling her cheek, he whispered,

“Judy?”

She looked at him with tearstained eyes, waiting for him to continue.

“I’m not pressuring you to do anything. I just want you to know that I’m not going anywhere, no matter what you decide … okay?”

She nodded and let him place a soft kiss against her lips, making her relax a bit more.

“Gene?”

“Hm?”

“I’m truly sorry about the way I treated you ...”

“No … you have nothing to be sorry about.”

“Yes I do, it wasn’t fair.”

But he only shook his head. Playing with her fingers in his hand he said in a melancholy voice,

“I’m sorry for being so harsh on you … I should have known better.”

“You couldn’t have.”

He lifted her hand to his mouth and kissed her palm.

“Will you please stay with me tonight?”

“I thought you would never ask.” She said, softly smiling at him.

Feeling relieved that her mood seemed to lighten a bit he leaned in to place a soft kiss against her lips.

“Darling?”

“You don’t happen to have something to eat here, do you? … I’m starving.”

He had to stifle a laugh.

“Hm, how does a very early breakfast sound?”

“Perfect.”

He kissed her forehead before he got up.

“You stay here, I’ll be right back.”

After he left the room Judy got out of the bed. She needed to get out of that dress instantly - it had been uncomfortable all night. She quickly unzipped it and pulled it down before she threw it over the chair in the corner. Opening his closet she had to giggle, even here everything was neatly organized. Judy pulled one shirt from its hanger and put it on, fastening up a few of its buttons. Burying her nose in the shirt’s collar she took in the scent that she loved so much and smiled. It seemed like a huge weight had been lifted off of her shoulders, she already felt so much lighter. There were still so many doubts in her mind but she was so relieved that she didn’t have to worry about him anymore … in fact it was quite the opposite.  
Trying to be very quiet she sneaked into the kitchen where she saw him standing in front of the stove. She walked up behind him and put her arms around him, making him turn around. He looked at her a little baffled as he noticed her change of attire.

“I had to get out of that dress, it’s been bugging me all night … Hope that’s alright.”

“Uh … yes sure.”

She noticed him checking her out as she walked around the kitchen island to sit down on one of the stools.

“Here you go.” He said as he placed an omelette in front of her.

“Thank you.”

He sat down opposite of her, looking at her in amusement.

“What about you?”

“Oh, I’m not very hungry.”

“Very well then … but would you stop staring at me like that already? I promise, I’m not gonna run out on you tonight.”

“Good, I’m glad.” He smiled at her.

When she was finished he put the dishes in the sink as she hopped on the counter next to him.

“Feeling better?”

“Yes.”

“Tired?”

Taking hold of his arm she pulled him close to her, making him step in between her legs. He was always so in control but after her news and the emotional outburst that followed it he seemed almost shy, like he wasn’t sure about how he should behave … what would be okay for him to do and what not. She needed to show him. She had missed him too much to let this night go to waste.

“No, not tired … Darling?”

“Yes?”

“Would you do something else for me?” She said, placing her hands around his neck

“Anything.”

“Please make love to me.”

Judy could feel him tense up.

“Judy I … Are you sure?”

“Mhm.” She nodded

“You know, we don’t have to do it, right? I would ne-” But she silenced him with her fingers.

“I know we don't _have_ to do it …”, she started opening the buttons of her shirt, “but I know I _want_ to.”

Wiggling her shoulders a bit she let the shirt fall down further, giving him an almost full view of her breasts. His eyes wandering over her body gave her the last bit of confidence that she’d needed. She slightly tugged on his neck as she leaned in, placing a soft kiss against his lips before letting her tongue run along his lower lip.

“Yes?”

“Yes.” He breathed before he pulled the shirt the rest of the way down, looking at her in wonder.

“Oh Jesus.”

“Yah well, that’s one of the good parts about it.”

She could tell she had broken the ice when he kissed her again. He didn’t hold back this time as his tongue found hers and his hands moved over her, cupping her breast in his hand … a little too hard, making her flinch a little.

“Oh darling, I’m sorry, I didn’t think.” He said in remorse and removed his hand from her but she placed it back where it was. She wanted him to touch her.

“No please, I want you to … just be gentle.”

She leaned in again to kiss him, as his fingers stroked over her breasts, making her moan in delight. He parted from her lips and bent down, letting his tongue play over her nipple before he softly sucked it into his mouth.

“I craved you so much.” She purred.

“Oh baby, you have no idea how much I longed for you.” He said before he found her mouth again.

“Take me to bed.” She whispered.

He didn't think twice this time. Picking her up he carried her back into the bedroom.

It had never been quite like this. It felt like all the times they’d been together combined and more as he made love to her. He tried pleasing her any way he could, responding to every sigh and moan that escaped her mouth. She felt him so deep as he thrust into her it seemed like he melted more into her with every second that passed. Slowly building up his rhythm his thrusts became deeper and longer as he felt her getting closer to her climax. They came almost simultaneously, moaning into each other’s mouths as they held onto each other, relishing the feeling of wave after wave of their release rolling through them, making them shudder in pleasure.

He held her body so close to him afterwards, desperately praying that he wouldn't have to let her go again.

“Happy New Year, my darling.” He whispered against her lips.

“Happy New Year.” She cooed, praying that it would be …

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Concerning Vincente and his "affair": I forgot about that earlier, but decided to mention it (a tiny bit) in this part. Would add it to part 2 if I ever decide to edit it.
> 
> About the Pirate kiss: Mack The Black (the number that's in the version that we all know) was shot on 12/17&18/47. I don't think (after countless times of rewatching the scene, analysing every bit of clothing, hairstrands, people, movements, etc.) that the kiss was part of the retakes but for dramatic reasons it is. LOL
> 
> I know this is very ficitonal but this story has been stuck in my head for ages.


	5. Chapter 5

Even though he was utterly exhausted Gene couldn’t bring himself to sleep. He wanted to savor every second with her as she lay beside him, curled up against his chest, looking so peaceful … at last. He was so relieved that everything was out in the open now and hoped that she felt the same way, but the mere hope that he had taken some of the pressure off just wasn’t enough to calm him … Even though he tried to not let it show, last night had been a lot for him to take. He meant every word that he said, that wasn’t the point, but he was so afraid. Afraid of what this might do to her. She was already under such strain. He couldn’t even imagine what she’d been through these last couple of months. And whatever she decided to do, he sensed that it wouldn’t make anything easier for them, but he was so willing to fight for them. Now more than ever. Very cautiously he tightened his arms around her and lay down again, attempting to finally go to sleep. Judy stirred a little, but fortunately didn’t open her eyes. She just moved closer to him.

When Judy woke up, she felt completely peaceful. She tried remembering a time when she had slept this well but couldn’t. Gene’s arm was still loosely wrapped around her waist and judging by his steady breathing against her neck he was still sound asleep. Last night had turned out to be more wonderful than she ever thought possible, and she allowed herself to be happy, even if it was only for the moment. Very carefully she tugged on his arm to pull it closer around her and shut her eyes again. She wanted to savor this moment just a little bit longer. Judy only realized that she had dozed off again when she was awoken by feather soft kisses, placed between her shoulder blades and Gene’s arms that pulled her closer against his body, making her smile.

“Mmmh.”

The sound she made was enough to make him shiver.

“Good morning, sweetheart.” He whispered against her neck.

Turning around in his arms she placed her leg over his hip, causing him to run his hand along her thigh.

“Is it still morning?”

Gene grinned against her lips.

“Probably not.”

He kissed her softly, tugging on her lower lip, making her sigh.

“But I don’t care.”

His kisses moved down to her jawline and neck, sucking on her favorite spot gently, so he wouldn’t leave any traces. Judy moaned softly, still a little drowsy from her long lay in, but her senses were fully alert as his hand wandered up her thigh until he grasped her bottom all the while his lips didn’t let go of her as they found their way back to her mouth, devouring her in a hungry kiss. She never wanted to leave again, especially when she felt him stir against her, making a gush of warmth move between her legs, but Judy knew she needed to leave soon … she could only imagine what her husband thought since she still hadn’t returned home yet.

“Darling?”

He allowed himself one last kiss against her delicious lips, trying to convey all his love for her. Gene knew what she wanted to say … or rather had to do. The thought of letting her go again scared the shit out of him. There still was so much uncertainty, and he had no clue how they would go on from here, he just knew that he needed to let her do whatever would be right for her.

“I know.” He murmured after he parted from her lips.

Judy rested her forehead against his and closed her eyes as she tried taking everything in.

“I wish I could stay.” She whispered.

Gene sighed as he hugged her closer to him, burying his face in her neck. She could virtually feel the turmoil inside of him … she could tell he was more worried and unsure about everything than he admitted. She believed what he’d told her, but she also sensed that he tried to cover up feelings that he thought would unsettle her even more … it touched her, but he didn’t need to be so strong for her.

“Are you okay, darling?”

“Sure.”

Trying to turn away from her, so she wouldn’t be able to look at him, he got out of bed, picking up his boxers that were still lying on the floor. Seemingly agitated he let his hand run through his hair, as he tried to avoid her eyes that followed his every move.

“Do you have to leave right away, or would you have breakfast with me? … Again.”

Judy smiled and leaned over to reach for his hand to get his attention.

“I’d love to, darling.”

Throwing the covers back she got out of the bed and walked past him. She noticed Gene’s eyes trailing over her body.

“I’m just gonna go hop in the shower real quick if that’s alright.”

“Of course.”

But she was already halfway down the hall.

The warm water on her skin felt so satisfying, and Judy closed her eyes as she tried to stay in her little happy bubble just a bit longer. She didn’t even want to know how she would feel if it burst, but sensed that it would once reality set in again later that day.  
Only a few minutes later the shower curtain was opened, making her grin. Turning around she saw Gene stepping in behind her … she kinda hoped he would follow her.

“Did you change your mind?” She asked with a smirk around her lips.

“No, but breakfast can wait.”

As she placed her arms around his neck, his hands ran up and down her sides, making her shiver.

“I’d pick this over breakfast any day.” She cooed before she leaned in to kiss him.

It wasn’t his plan, he just wanted to take a shower with her, but their kiss got heated so fast that he forgot everything about it. Sliding her tongue over his she let her fingers wander to his chest and further down until she reached his already throbbing erection. He had been hard all morning but didn’t want her to do anything she wouldn’t be in the mood for, but she definitely was now. Her lips didn’t leave his as she curled her fingers around him, moving them up and down in a tantalizing rhythm that had him moaning within seconds.

“What are you doing?”

“Making you feel better.”

“Darling, you don’t hav-”

But she silenced him with another kiss.

“Na-ah, I want to. I’ve missed you so much.”

With that she let her lips drop to his chawline, down his neck and to his chest before she knelt down in front of him. She could hear his breathing grow heavier as he waited in anticipation, leaning his head back against the cool bathroom wall. Sensing that he wouldn’t be able to object any longer, Judy leaned forward and slowly closed her lips around him. She circled the tip with her tongue a few times and could feel him grabbing her hair as a faint groan filled the steamy air. She moved down and let him rest on her tongue a bit before she dragged her lips back up, tightening her cheeks around him. Feeling him grip her tighter, she repeated her movements until she had him moaning in pleasure.

“Oh fuck.” He let out, and she smiled to herself - she loved hearing how much she could please him.

It felt like he had never been this hard before … Gene knew he needed to stop this but couldn’t - her lips felt too good on him and the soft mewls that escaped her mouth as she went at him told him she was enjoying it too. His careful movements as he tried meeting her lips turned more and more vigorous with each delicious suck. He almost groaned in protest when she took her mouth away from him, but she stayed down, looking up at him.

“I love this.” She purred before she held out her tongue again, letting it run from the base to the top.

“Oh babe.”

“Want me to go on?” Judy asked in a seductive voice before she softly kissed the tip, making him twitch.

“Please.”

“I want you to come inside my mouth.”

He almost did right there and then but managed to hold back and only let out a desperate groan as her plush lips surrounded him again. The way she worked him inside her mouth felt so good and listening to her appreciative sucks gave him the rest. Placing his hand against her jaw, Gene moved his hips in tune with her mouth as he watched her. Seeing how his cock moved in and out between her lips while her eyes were closed, her lashes resting against her skin made it almost unbearable and just as her eyes locked with his as she closed her cheeks on him one more time, he felt his legs almost give in as he shot everything he had into her mouth. Leaning his head back he groaned out his pleasure. After she kissed him one more time she got up and he gathered her in his arms immediately, clasping her body against his. He was still breathing heavily when he felt her placing soft kisses against his neck.

“My wonderful man.”

Gene’s heart overflowed hearing her call him that. Tightening his hold on her, he looked down and cradled her cheek before he pressed a hard kiss against her lips.

“I love you so much.”

Judy smiled up at him before he leaned in to kiss her again, letting his hands wander over her body. He wanted to return the favor, but to his confusion she stopped him, laying her hands on his chest to pull back a little.

“I guess we should get going.”

Even though she was smiling he could see a tinge of melancholy in her eyes. She let him wash her but wouldn’t let him go beyond that. Once again making him wish that he could read her mind.

After they got out Judy put on one of his shirts while Gene finished preparing breakfast. She wanted to feel him one more time, but knew she wouldn’t have been able to fully enjoy it. The thought of having to deal with the reality of her current situation made her very apprehensive, but she tried swallowing down the unsettling feelings. Judy realized she’d promised him that she wouldn’t shut him out again but nevertheless she prayed that he would just let it lie for today. Her mind had been so made up, but now doubts came rushing back … he’d mixed everything up. If she was completely honest with herself, though she knew that a small silent part of her started to believe him … the part that wished it would truly be possible. Trying to shove her feelings away, she joined him in the kitchen. After they ate together she went back into the bedroom, needing to change back into her own clothes. She’d love nothing better than to just stay in his comfortably worn in shirt but that definitely wouldn’t be appropriate. Holding the front of her dress up against her chest she walked back into the hall.

“Gene?”

“Yah?” 

“Will you zip me up?”

She turned around as Gene stepped behind her. Taking hold of each side of her dress he held them together as he dragged up the zipper. Judy took in a deep breath when she felt some resistance.

“It’s gotten a little tight.” She giggled, a little embarrassed.

Using a bit more force he got it the rest of the way up and turned her around, keeping his arms loosely around her waist.

“You look beautiful.” He murmured, making her blush. Considering what she did to him not even an hour earlier it seemed silly, but she did.

“Maybe last night … but not today, my face is an absolute mess.” She giggled.

Judy knew she didn’t look good without any makeup on. But he wouldn’t have any of it. Cradling her face in one hand he said,

“No honey”, he leaned in and pressed a kiss against her lips, “you’re the sexiest and most beautiful woman. Any day.”

Trying to hide the emotions welling up inside of her Judy leaned in to kiss him once more.

“All set?” She asked turning away from him to grab her purse that was still sitting on the small table in the hall.

Gene could tell she was trying to hide her emotions from him as she averted her eyes, but he didn’t want to make her uncomfortable.

“Yes.” He answered and grabbed his keys. Taking her hand, he led her outside to the car.

Feeling her tension during the ride was almost unbearable to him. Gene had hoped so much that her lightened mood would carry on, but after they’d gotten out of the shower it started to fade, and now it was definitely gone. He tried holding her hand the entire way through to show her he was still there. Just before he reached her driveway he stopped the car.

“Do you want me to drive you up there?”

“No, that’s alright. Here’s probably best … Thank you, Gene.”

Judy didn’t get out, she didn’t move at all. In fact, she seemed almost petrified.

“Darling, you know that I -”

Her eyes jolted up, meeting his.

“Please stop. We already talked about everything last night.”

He took in a deep breath, trying to remain calm.

“And I meant what I said.”

“I believe you.” She nodded. “But that doesn’t mean I’m gonna change my mind.”

Seeing the genuine anguish in his eyes pained her, but she wouldn’t keep his hopes up when she wasn’t sure about the outcome.

A hint of panic rose up in him as he realized that there wasn’t anything left for him to do. Placing his arm around her, Gene pulled her closer to him, hoping that she would hear him out.

“I hate this. I hate dropping you off here without knowing when I’ll see you again. I know I have to let you go, but I don’t want to. It kills me to see you leave. Especially now.” He allowed himself to let his hand rest on her belly and she tensed a little but fortunately didn’t shove it away. She looked at him like she hung onto every word that he was saying, trying to take it all in.

“I so wish that things were different right now … I feel like I’m failing you.”

“You’re not. Last night was wonderful, and you did help me … a lot, but … it’s just the way it is, so let’s not make it harder on ourselves.”

She wanted to scoot away from him, but he held onto her.

“When?”

Judy knew what he was asking … he wanted to know when the appointment would be.

“I’d rather you didn’t know.”

A tear rolled down his cheek, but he just wiped it away, trying to respect her decision.

“Will you please call me?”

“Yes … Sorry, darling, I really need to go now.”

Judy only meant to give him a small kiss goodbye but the way he kissed her back made her forget everything. Her lips opened against his as she let him take over, kissing her so deeply that she lost her sense of time. After they parted Gene bent down and placed a kiss against her stomach, making her heart flutter.

“I love you.” He whispered, his voice almost breaking.

Trying to hide her face she leaned in to kiss him one more time. She feared if she told him how she felt she would just burst into tears.

“Bye Gene.”

Before she could change her mind Judy opened the door and got out of the car, quickening her pace with each step as she felt herself being drawn back to him.

Judy tried to be as quiet as possible when she opened the door. When she peeked through the door crack and couldn’t see anyone she stepped inside and quickly made her way up the stairs and to her bedroom. Luckily there was no one inside. Walking into her closet she ripped the dress off of her body and picked out some slacks and a sweater. Just as she pulled the sweater over her head she heard the door being opened behind her, making her jump and turn around.

“Good to see you’ve found your way home at last.” Vincente said as he walked closer to her.

“Vincente, I’m not interested in listening to any accusations, I have a headache.” Judy tried, wanting to get rid of him.

“Well, there must be some truth to it if you already expected to hear accusations.”

“I had a good time.” She said, throwing her hands out to the side. “There’s nothing wrong with that. Now if you’ll excuse me. I want to go check on Liza.”

But Vincente took hold of her arm.

“She’s taking a nap.”

“Well, then imma take a bath.” Judy said, yanking her arm out of his hold before she walked past him into the bathroom.

She turned on the faucet and let it fill the tub. By the time it was halfway full she decided that it would be unlikely he was going to come after her and disrobed, letting her clothes glide to the floor. But as she dipped her toe into the water the door opened, making her sigh in frustration.

“Don’t you ever knock?” She asked, turning around to him.

She noticed how his eyes travelled over her body, making her cross her arms over her chest as she realized he hadn’t seen her fully naked in quite some time now.

“Don’t you think we should talk about this?”

Judy rolled her eyes and turned around again before she stepped into the tub and got comfortable in the water, hoping that he would just dissolve into the steamy air.

“Look Vince, I’m tired. I didn’t sleep all night.”

“Can’t say I’m surprised.”

Feeling like she was about to lose it, she leaned forward, bracing herself on the side of the tub.

“Get the hell out! I’m not asking you again.”

He opened his mouth, wanting to retort something but then changed his mind and turned around, slamming the door shut behind him. Judy could tell he had her all figured out … sometimes it seemed like he could read her like a book … and even when she believed him to be occupied with his own issues he still seemed to pay enough attention to her to not lose sight of her completely. She could only hope that he didn’t suspect anything else.

They didn’t speak all day. By the time Judy got out of the bath he wasn’t there anymore, thank goodness. She didn’t have the nerve to talk to him just yet. Instead, she walked to Liza’s bedroom. Judy watched her sleep a little while, but soon she stirred and tossed her arm to the side before she opened her eyes in confusion. When she spotted her mother sitting on the other side of the room she stood up and held her arms out to her, waiting for her to pick her up.  
Judy spent the whole day with her, thankful that it helped keeping her mind of things. Vincente joined them in the afternoon, and fortunately, they didn’t get into any more discussions. After dinner when Liza was already asleep Vincente retreated into his study. Judy got comfortable on the living room couch with a book, but she didn’t feel like sitting there all alone, it only made her mind wander. She got up and walked to Vincente’s study, wanting to tell him she would be turning in. He was just sitting there, staring at the glass of brandy he held in his hand, seemingly lost in thought. Judy cleared her throat, trying to get his attention.

“Good night. I’m gonna go to sleep.”

“Judy?”

He looked up from his glass.

“Yeah?”

“This”, he pointed first to her and then to him, “it’s not working anymore, is it?”

The quiet realization that was in his voice caught her a little off guard.

“Should we just stop pretending?”

Utterly speechless Judy walked into the room and took a seat in front of his desk, suddenly feeling like a little school girl who did something wrong.

“Do you want out?” She asked, her voice slightly faltering.

If that were the case, this would be the end of it. There definitely would be no way for her to keep the baby.

“No … I don’t think it would be wise to do something rash … at least for now. And I don’t want Liza to suffer because of it. But I am gonna move into one of the spare bedrooms.”

“Alright.” She answered, a little relieved that he wasn’t going to pack his bags right away.

“I never wanted this, Judy. You’re my wife. I wanted to hold on to you, but it just doesn’t make sense anymore …”

“Mhm” she just said, still trying to process everything.

He studied her intently.

“You stayed with him last night, didn’t you?”

Judy waited a while before she answered as she considered lying about it, but she didn’t see the point anymore.

“Yes, I did.”

He sighed when he heard her say the words out loud he already knew to be true.

“Has it gotten more serious?”

Judy had to stifle a cynical laugh … given her current situation.

“If anything it’s gotten more complicated … let’s just say that.”

She noticed the quizzical look he gave her.

“Okay … I don’t even want to know it all.”

“Alright then.” Judy got out of the chair, wanting to leave as fast as possible. She didn’t like the direction their conversation was taking. “I have an early call tomorrow, I-”  
But Vincente interrupted her.

“I know, just one more thing. Judy, I’m gonna be with you for however long you need me. I want you to know that.” He looked at her intently … seeming like he was hoping for a reaction from her. “I love our girl more than anything and I love you. You’re both so special to me. I hope you know that. But maybe it is time that we start looking after ourselves again … find out what we really want and stop pretending. Alright?”

“Yes.” She nodded, trying to keep her head down. His words made her a little emotional ...

“Is there anything else going on Judy?”

Feeling herself getting a little anxious as the blood drifted from her face she started picking at her fingernails.

“Hm?”

“I don’t know, it just seems like … you’re not yourself lately.”

“No, I’m - it’s just a lot at the moment … you know, with work and everything. I hope it will get easier from now on.”

Judy tried putting on a brave face. His eyes told her that he wasn’t fully buying it, but he let it rest for now.

“Yeah, I hope so, too. Goodnight dear.”

“Goodnight.”

Judy got into bed but had trouble getting comfortable, she missed feeling Gene’s warm body against her and already regretted not stealing one of his shirts. In a weird way her conversation with Vincente took a burden from her shoulders, as he had also realized that their relationship couldn’t be saved anymore, making its end foreseeable, but that didn’t mean it would make her decision any easier … and it was only days away now.

______________

With every mile they got closer to the doctor’s office Judy felt equally more sick. She didn’t say a thing throughout the whole drive, knowing that if she did she would just start crying again … like the whole previous night. In the morning she felt like a total wreck. By the time Kay had picked her up she had regained some composure but even through her dark sunglasses she wasn’t able to hide the dark circles under her tear stained eyes. There were multiple times on the long drive over to the doctors when Kay just wanted to pull the car around … it was simply too hard to bear seeing her friend like this. At this point it seemed like it would be far more damaging for her to lose this baby than it would be to keep it. Kay was afraid that this would make her hit rock bottom.

“I think we’re here, darling.” Kay said quietly after they came to a halt.

Judy slowly looked up and turned her head to look out the window, but quickly gazed down into her lap again.

“Yes, that’s it.”

“Do you want me to go in with you?”

She looked like she was on the brink of throwing up and Kay took her hand, but Judy pulled hers away. Kay reached behind and pulled her purse to the front, searching for her cigarette box.

She lit one and held it out to Judy.

“Here, take this.”

She took it and inhaled deeply.

“Does it help?”

Judy only shook her head.

“Would you go around the block one more time?”

Kay pulled out of their parking spot. When they reached the red light at the intersection she looked over at Judy.

“I don’t like this.”

“Ha, well, me neither.” She answered before she took another long drag on her cigarette, her hands slightly shaking.

“Yes, that’s obvious.”

“Like this is ever an easy thing to do! … Gosh, what were you expecting?” She yelled before the tears got the better of her, making her sob silently.

“Exactly this to be honest …”

“Well, I’m glad I’m not a letdown then. Seems like you got what you came here for.”

“I came here to help you.”

“No one can help me.”

“Gosh Judy, I won’t listen to any more of your self-pity. It’s not too late yet.”

Judy propped her elbows up on her knees and buried her face in her hands, as the tears took hold of her again, and was practically shaking as she let out gut-wrenching sobs. Kay let her be for a moment, but soon they got back to where they started and Kay pulled over, which got Judy back to reality.

“Would you … would you go around again?” She asked in a frail voice, sniffing her nose.

Kay sighed but kept going, watching Judy as she nervously wrung her hands.

“What did he say?”

“Hm?”

Her eyes shot up.

“You said you talked to him, but you didn’t have time to tell me how he reacted.”

Judy took a deep breath in … Thinking back to the night when she told him made a wave of warmth move through her.

“He … he was shocked at first … but then … Oh Kay, he was so darling … he listened to what I had to say … he even seemed happy about it.”

“Does he know you’re here?”

“Yes, but I didn’t want him to know when it would be … he definitely doesn’t want me to do this.”

“Well, that’s good isn’t it?”

But Judy only shook her head.

“What does it matter? It only makes this harder. He’s not my husband. We don’t stand a chance.”

“Did you talk to him?”

“Who?”

“Your husband.”

“No, I didn’t know how … It’s basically over with us though … he moved into one of the spare rooms just a few days ago. He said that he won’t leave yet because of Liza and that he’d be there for as long as I need him but … he won’t help me with this, Kay! This is too much to ask. I don’t think he’ll understand.”

“Well, he might just have to.”

Judy shook her head no, tears rolling down from underneath her sunglasses. They had reached their starting point again. Kay looked at her as she gestured in the direction of the entrance.

“Go on then.”

“What?”

“Seems like now would be a good time to go in. I mean you obviously aren’t gonna change your mind so … it’s now or never, right?”

The understanding method obviously didn’t help her with making any kind of a decision, so Kay felt like she needed to put her on the spot. Judy just looked at her, quite speechless. After a while she turned around, putting her hand on the door handle, but she didn’t open it. Instead she let herself fall back into her seat.

“What? Do you want me to go round again?”

Judy shook her head no. She hesitated a moment longer but then her body seemed to relax a bit, her voice crystal clear when she answered her.

“No … I want you to take us home.”

Kay reached over and took her hand, a big smile on her face.

“Yes?”

“Yes.”

She leaned in, squeezing Judy’s back.

“Go, before I change my mind.”

“Right.”

Kay tried to regain some composure and fiddled with her hair before she started the car again. When they drove down the road Judy felt like a huge burden was lifted from her shoulders. Everything spoke against it, but still, she couldn’t help but feel like she had just taken a step in the right direction. A wave of relief took hold of her, causing her let out a deep sigh. As Kay reached over and took her hand the tears started again … but for the first time in a long time they weren’t tears of anxiety or sadness.

“Are you okay?”

“Yes.” She nodded and lifted her shades before she placed them on the top of her head. “Better than before.”

“Good … Judy?”

“Yeah?”

“We’ll do anything to make this work. You’re not alone, alright? Not ever. It’s gonna be okay.”

Judy sniffed her nose and nodded as she wiped away her tears.

By the time they got back into town Judy was sure there was only one place she wanted to go to. She needed to tell him. Now. Vincente didn’t expect her to be home anyways since she told him she would spend the night at Kay's.

“Kay?”

“Yess?”

“I’m not going home tonight.”

Kay let out a high-pitched laugh.

“Alright, tell me where you wanna go then.” She said, winking at her.

About ten minutes later Kay pulled over as she stopped in front of Gene’s house. Turning around in her seat Judy gave her a warm hug.

“Thank you, Kay.”

“You’re so welcome, darling. And now go enjoy this.” Judy pulled back, giggling. “I’ll wait here until you’re inside.”

“Alright.”

Judy turned around one more time, waving her friend goodbye and blowing kisses before she walked up to Gene’s door. She rang the doorbell but there was no answer … the second time it was the same thing. She wanted to go around the house, but suddenly the door was ripped open, startling her a bit. Gene just gazed at her with wide eyes, seemingly astonished to see her.

“Judy”

“Hi” She said in a small voice. The slight spark of confidence that had been there a moment ago was gone … suddenly she was very unsure.

“What are you doing here?”

Seeing her here made him very anxious. He had the feeling that she didn’t just stop by to say hello.

“Have I caught you at the wrong time?”

“No, no I just, I’m sorry I guess I fell back asleep, I didn’t hear you.”

“Well, will you let me in then?” She stepped a little closer.

Only then he realized that she was still standing outside.

“Of course.” He quickly took her hand and led her inside. “I’m sorry, I’m happy to see you, honestly.”

Leaning in he kissed her softly. After they parted she looked up at him, trying to catch his attention.

“I’m not alone, though.” She said, a shy smile playing on her lips.

Very slowly it got to him what she was trying to tell him, he didn’t dare to believe it.

“Are you saying that ...?”

Tears started welling up in her eyes as she nodded.

“I was there today but … I couldn’t do it.”

“Oh, darling …” was all he could get out as he looked at her completely taken aback.

Even though she already imagined what Gene’s reaction would be like, feeling his reassurance was such a relief that she let out a small cry as he folded her into his arms. Feeling his body melt against hers like this made her feel like she was finally complete, and she wanted to savor every bit of it.

“Seems like you’re stuck with me now.” She said after a little while.

Judy only meant it as a joke, but she could feel him tightening his hold on her a moment as he tried stifling a sob that got lost in her hair as he placed kisses against it before he stepped back to look her in the eyes. She could see complete sincerity in them as he shook his head in disbelief.

“I love you.” He said after he tried collecting himself a bit, but Judy could still see the tears that had started to build up in his eyes.

Cradling her cheek in one hand he slowly leaned in to kiss her while his other hand moved down between them to find her belly, softly stroking it, making butterflies fly through the empty spaces.

“Do you have time to stay?” Gene asked after he’d parted from her lips.

Judy nodded.

“If you’d like me to.”

“If I didn’t have to, I would never let you go again baby.” He whispered against her lips before he kissed her again. His lips felt so good against hers that Judy let out a soft sigh. She only noticed that his hands had moved from her back down to her bottom when he picked her up. Gene didn’t want to overpower her but when he heard the small noise escape her lips he felt such a strong wave of love rush through him that he just had to be as close as possible to her. His lips eventually left hers as he carried her to the bed and lay down next to her.

“What made you change your mind?”

Judy shrugged her shoulders. She didn’t even have a proper answer … she knew having the baby didn’t make any sense, but going in there was even less of an option at that moment.

“I just couldn’t … I can’t explain.”

He pulled her closer against him, kissing the top of her head. They were silent for a moment as each of them tried to grasp the realness of their new reality.

“Gene?”

“Yes?”

“I’m scared.”

Gene slid down a bit and lay his head beside hers, facing her, so he could look her in the eyes. Placing his palm against her cheek, he gently stroked it.

“I know darling. But believe me, I will do anything I can to make this easier for you.”

“But how? I have no idea how we should go on from here.” She said in an almost tiny voice, it didn’t seem like she was done talking, though, so Gene waited for her to gather her thoughts. “We won’t be able to be together. People can’t know about this. How is this supposed to work?” She listed and the tone of her voice sounded so hopeless that it almost rubbed off on him, but he wouldn’t let it. He wasn’t naive, he knew this would be beyond hard. The whole thing was insane but whenever he thought about it, he knew that it would be possible because he wanted their baby despite every hardship they might be facing. And even if it would separate them for a while longer he knew that they would make it through because they both wanted each other more than anything.

“Darling please don’t worry so much about all of this - I know this is so overwhelming right now, but please trust me. We will find a way. You have me. In every way possible. I’m not gonna go anywhere.”

She tried a weak smile, but he could still see her concern.

“Talk to me honey.”

“They’ll fire me.” She got out after a little while.

“They won’t. You’re the biggest talent they have, they won’t just let you go.”

“You don’t know them like I do.”

“That’s true … but I know that you have people there that have your back.”

“When I’m done with Easter Parade … I will tell them.”

“So you plan on finishing it?”

“Of course.” She blurted out, sounding almost a little offended. “I continued working the last time I was pregnant”

“But this is different. This time it isn’t just a guest spot, Judy.”

“I will do it anyway.”

“But how much longer do you think you’ll be able to hide this?”

“Excuse me?” It was then he realized what he had said. “When I was pregnant with Liza I was already five months along by the time we wrapped and no one had any complaints about the way I looked, thank you very much.”

“That’s not - I wasn’t even …” He let out a deep sigh. “I’m sorry, honey, I didn’t mean it like that.”

“Besides, it won’t be long now anyway.”

“I know. But back then they all were aware of your situation. You might wanna tell them… at least Chuck. I know he’ll understand, and it would make me feel a lot better knowing that someone there was keeping an eye on you.”

Judy let out a deep breath. She hadn’t even considered this idea … and it might make her feel more at ease as well.

“I’ll think about it.”

Even though she seemed a little less tense Gene could tell there was still something on her mind that was bothering her.

“Is there something else?”

“I have absolutely no idea how I’m gonna tell Vincente … let alone how he will react … We talked a few days ago … we’re over, Gene. For good.” She said as she wiped some tears from her eyes. “He’s moved into one of the spare rooms. He said he would be there for me for as long as I need him but this … it will be too much, I know it.”

“You’re over?”

“Mm hm. He said it doesn’t make any sense for us to go on like this … and it’s the truth. It doesn’t … I would be happy about it, but this doesn’t make things any easier.”

Gene didn’t want to make any empty promises … he also had no idea how Vincente was going to react, but he knew that he didn’t want to let Judy face this conversation alone. And he was well aware of the fact that he would need to talk to him as well.

“Do you want me to be there when you tell him?”

“No”, she said, shaking her head. “No, I have to speak to him alone. I owe him that much.”

“Okay.” Gene murmured, feeling not quite comfortable with her decision but knowing that he needed to accept it. “But please tell me if you change your mind.”

Judy nodded before she got closer to him and buried her face in the crook of his neck. Feeling her calm down a bit Gene allowed himself to relax as well. His hand moved between them, placing it on her belly and Judy could feel the warmth of his palm moving through her skin, as he stroked it gently. She placed a couple of soft kisses against his neck, making him shiver.

“Darling?” She whispered.

“Yes?”

Propping herself up on one elbow she let her fingers move over his chest as she looked at him intently.

“Can we just forget about everything for today? I just wanna enjoy this day with you and pretend that it’s all okay.”

“I can do that.” He smiled at her and leaned forward to kiss her slightly parted lips. “Just the day?” He asked, hoping that she would stay the night and tugged at her lips one more time.

“Well if you’re asking me like this …” She teased. “I’d love to spend the night. They’re not expecting me back until tomorrow, anyway.”

“Good.” He said and rolled her to her back, making her squeal.

The way he gazed at her made her heart so full. It was as though it was then he let the whole extent of this life altering situation get to him. She was having his baby … He was trying to take it all in, while keeping his emotions at bay. Judy reached up, placing her hand on the side of his face.

“Hi” She cooed.

“Hi” He answered and planted a kiss against her cheek, trying to hide the tears that he knew were about to return. When she felt him stay there she moved her arms around his back, letting her hands wander over the tense muscles.

“I’m not asking you to be strong for me.” She whispered into his ear.

He nodded and leaned on his arm to look at her, his eyes all teary but a smile playing on his lips.

“Oh, Judy. I’m so happy.”

Smiling back at him Judy reached up and let her lips run along his before she opened her lips against his, inviting him to deepen the kiss, and he did. His tongue slid over hers before he sucked on her lips repeatedly, making her sigh in pleasure. It felt so good that the sensations moved directly between her legs, stirring her arousal instantly. It seemed like it didn’t take much these days anyway. In the last few days just the thought of him and how he could make her feel was enough to make her ache for him. Part of it was for obvious reasons, but this went beyond simple attraction and love and Judy knew she had nothing but her pregnancy to blame for this, making her feel extra randy. And while she felt shameful about it when she was alone, now with him on top of her all these feelings disappeared instantly as they were replaced by nothing but pure bliss.

Their kisses got heated so quickly and his hands moved over her body in such a good way that it brought her to the point of no return. Fortunately, Gene could read her like a book and didn’t hold back this time as he started undressing her, slowly. Kissing every inch of skin that was revealed to him. After he got undressed himself he draped the covers over them, seeming as though he wanted to keep her away from any harm while shutting away the rest of the word. Judy didn’t know where she stopped, and he began as he started to make love to her. She completely melted into the bed as she felt him move inside of her so effortlessly. Hitting all the right spots and kissing her when she thought she’d lose herself in the feel of him. Both clung to each other as they reached an almost simultaneous climax, their bodies shuddering in release. He couldn’t stop kissing her.

They rested in bed for a little while longer, both enjoying the soft caresses and lazy kisses after sex. But after an hour Gene could feel her getting restless, telling him that she wanted to go outside and do something. Gene would have been content just lying there with her forever and tried ignoring her at first but when she started nudging his sides and kept pulling the covers away from him, teasing him and calling him lazy he knew he didn’t have any other choice than to follow her request. After he took a quick shower and got dressed they left the house.

They spent the whole afternoon by the sea. Due to it being relatively cold for the season there weren’t many people around. Judy was cold herself, but she didn’t care - she welcomed the chilly breeze that helped clear her mind. Besides, she’d borrowed one of Gene’s sweaters, making her feel extra cozy. And she wouldn’t give it back this time. Gene got them some burgers which they ate by the pier before they took a stroll down to the beach. It was such a carefree atmosphere as they talked about anything and everything and goofed around with each other. Seeing her enjoy herself so much and hearing her contagious laughter again after all this time made him very happy. Trying to lock this moment deep into his soul, he wrapped his arms around her and allowed himself to kiss her.

By the time they drove back home it was already dark outside. And even with all the layers the cool January air she’d been exposed to all afternoon made her shiver. Glancing over at her Gene noticed and pulled her closer, so he could lay an arm around her body.

“Cold?”

“A little.”

She stayed like this cuddled up to his side the rest of the way back. It helped but by the time they got inside she was still freezing. After she hung her coat back on the coat rack he came up behind her and turned her around, putting his arms around her waist.

“Would you like to warm up a little more?” He asked as his hands moved to the small of her back, caressing her.

“Yesss” she grinned and leaned in, trying to kiss him, figuring that she knew what he had in mind. But he only placed a small peck on her lips before he pulled back and turned around to walk away.

“Come.”

Gene took her hand and led her into the living room. Judy smiled when she saw him lighting the fireplace. She already got comfortable on the couch and pulled off the sweater before she tossed it to the other end of the couch, but when he turned around again he didn’t follow her and instead was on his way to leave the room.

“Be right back, honey.” He called.

Groaning in frustration Judy let her body fall back into the pillows, but only a few seconds later she detected the sound of the water faucet. When he still hadn’t returned a couple of minutes later Judy stood up and made her way to the bathroom. Gene bent over the already half filled tub, checking the temperature of the water when he noticed her standing in the door frame.

“I thought you drowned.”

Gene chuckled and stood up. She walked up to him and put her arms around his waist, as he reached up to cradle her cheek.

“You enjoy making me wait, don’t you?”

“I thought this might make you feel better.” He said, glancing over at the tub.

“You know what would make me feel better?” She purred in a suggestive way as she fiddled with the hem of his shirt, trying to get her fingers underneath it, but his hands distracted her as he was undoing the buttons on her sweater one by one.

“Again?” He asked in a low voice.

“Maybe ...” She hummed as she folded her arms around his neck.

He leaned in and Judy closed her eyes, waiting to feel his lips against hers, but instead he trailed small kisses from the corner of her mouth down to her jawline until he reached the side of her neck. The way his lips sucked on her skin and his tongue moved over her made Judy feel so good, she didn’t even notice that he removed her sweater from her shoulders. It was when he pulled down the straps of her bra and reached behind her to open its clasp that she realized she was already halfway undressed. Wiggling her arms free she let it fall to the ground. Gene’s eyes wandered over her body appreciatively as he let his hands wander over her breasts and her stomach until he reached the waistband of her slacks and unbuttoned them. Letting him drag them down together with her panties, she stepped out of them before he ran his hands over her bare bum, pulling her closer against him. Judy could feel the already prominent bulge in his pants, and it made her want him even more but just as she wanted to tear the clothes off his body he let go off her and bent over to turn off the water.

“I think that’s enough.”

Judy hoped he was just talking about the water. Holding out his hand to her, so he could help her in she took it and stepped into the warm water. Sitting down, she leaned against the edge of the tub and let out a satisfied sigh.

“Is it good?”

“Ugh, heaven.” She sighed and sank deeper into the water, her eyes closed as she waited for him to join her.

“Good … Well, see you in a bit then.”

What the hell? Her eyes darted open as she couldn’t believe that he would just leave her like this after he made her feel so good already.

“Where do you think you’re going?”

When she saw the amused smile on his face as he turned back around to her, she wanted to smack him right across the face - she knew he was teasing her. Gene walked back to her until he was standing right in front of the tub.

“I’m not too keen on taking baths.”

Judy stood up again, bracing her wet hands on his shoulders as the water dripped down her body. She noticed the way he was eyeing her body up and down, and she had to suppress a giggle.

“I’ll make you.” She whispered against his mouth before she let her lips run over his, teasing him with her tongue before she kissed him.

When he let out a soft sigh and opened his lips against hers to deepen the kiss her hands wandered over his bottom, and she pulled him towards her with a sudden motion, making him almost fall over into the tub. Laughing, she leaned back and gave him a mischievous look.

“If you want more, I’m afraid you’ll have to join me.”

Gene grinned at her.

“I’ll have to get rid of these first.” He said, glancing down at his clothes.

Letting herself sink back into the warm water she made a motion with her hand, indicating for him to go ahead.

“Well, I ain’t stopping you, darling.”

He merely gave her a smirk as he started to undress himself, enjoying the way she was watching him. Her body tingled all over as he let one item of clothing after the other fall to the floor. She didn’t mean to stare, since she wanted to play it cool, but couldn’t help it as it seemed like she had no control over her face anymore. Even after all these months it was like the first time she saw him. And the delicious anticipation of what he would be doing with her heightened her senses even more. When he pulled down his boxers and his building erection sprang out their eyes met, and she grinned at him suggestively.

“Get in here already.”

After she scooted forward a little he got in behind her and enveloped her in his arms. Leaning back against his chest Judy let out a content sigh and snuggled closer against him as her hands ran over his strong arms.

“Happy?”

“Very.”

His head rested against hers, and he laid a small kiss against her temple while his hands started to caress her stomach. They stayed like this for a while but soon Judy started to get impatient when his hands kept moving over her body, discovering every inch. When his fingers wandered down and began stroking her between her legs she let out a soft whimper and laid her hand on top of his to keep it there. Gene could feel himself becoming harder when she started guiding his hand further down, waiting for him to plunge his finger into her. When he did she moaned out aloud and let go of his hand to brace herself against his thighs. He added a second finger and started moving them in and out, pushing up against her walls that were tightening by the second. Gene placed another kiss against her temple as she let out another gasp.

“I love you, honey.”

Tilting her head a little Judy brought her hand up to his face and leaned in to kiss him. It started out slow but the way her lips tugged at his made him lose his senses. His one hand moved up to cup her breast all the while his fingers didn’t stop rubbing along her already swollen bud. It would be so easy letting go right then, but she didn’t want to come like this. Turning around in his arms she placed her legs on each side of him before she sank down. Judy shut her eyes when she felt his rock hard erection press against her entrance, but she slid past it and sat down on his lap. As much as she wanted to do it here, she was so hot from all the steamy air and the warm water that she started to feel a little dizzy. When she looked down and brought her hand up to her head Gene started to get alarmed.

“What’s the matter sweetheart?”

“I don’t know, I don’t feel so good.”

Immediately he lifted her off of him and got out of the bathtub before he reached out his hand to help her out as well. Staggering a bit she walked to the wall opposite of the tub and leaned against the cool tiles, closing her eyes in delight. Gene was relieved when he saw her smiling again and moved his arms around her waist.

“Is it getting better?”

“Mhm” she nodded and rested her forehead against his. “I had another plan in mind though.”

The disappointment in her voice made him chuckle, and he lifted his hand to sweep a few damp strands of hair, all wavy from the humidity, off her cheek.

“Honey, it doesn’t matter.”

“Yes, it does.” She cried, her voice slightly faltering, as she smacked her hand against his chest in frustration.

Gene stepped back and tried looking at her, but she kept her eyes down.

“Are you crying?” He asked half laughing.

When Judy didn’t answer him he chucked a finger under her chin and saw that a couple of tears were running down her cheek.

“Judy, darling, please stop.”

“I wanted it to be perfect.” She said annoyed with herself.

“Come here.”

Gene tugged on her neck and kissed her. At first, she was hesitant, but when he nudged on her lips with his tongue she opened for him and let him take over. He slowly sucked on her lower lip and repeated the same thing on the upper. It felt so delicious that she couldn’t help but let out a soft moan. Burying his fingers in her hair he pushed her back against the wall, making her gasp as she felt his arousal pressing hard against her. The sounds that escaped her made him stir again - he was hard instantly. He parted from her lips a moment to look at her and Judy could see the hunger in Gene’s eyes as he asked for her consent to go on. But she only let out a whimper and threw her arms around his neck before she plunged her mouth on his, letting her tongue run over his in a very sexual way. That was enough for him. His hands wandered over her breasts and along her waist until he got to the back of her thighs. Cupping her bottom he lifted her and carried her out of the bathroom Judy could feel his solid erection twitching against her entrance as he walked, and she arched her back, moaning out loud.

“I want you.” She whined in frustration and tugged on his lips seductively while she pushed her body against his arousal, making him groan.

Only when he let her down on the armchair she realized that they were in the living room. When Gene turned away from her, she wanted to whine in frustration, but she tried to pull herself together. Judy watched him as he grabbed the soft throw that was lying on the couch and spread it out on the carpet next to the fireplace before he added a few of the cushions and another blanket. When he turned around to her again Judy just grinned at him.

“Do you have anything in particular in mind?”

Gene walked over to her and leaned down over her, so her back was pushed against the back of the chair.

“I thought this might make up for it.” He said, his lips so close to hers that they almost touched.

“We’ll see about that.” She teased him.

Gene brought one hand behind her back and the other under her thighs and lifted her off of the chair. She brought her hand up against his neck and kissed him before he sank down with her on top of the blanket. Bringing his hands behind her back he put her down very slowly and leaned over her. Judy opened her legs for him as he did so, feeling his erection pressing against her. She wanted him inside of her so much it hurt, but he didn’t seem to be in any rush, causing her frustration to reach another level. Stroking a few strands of hair out of her face he looked at her.

“Hi my darling.” He whispered against her lips as his hands stroked over her belly, making her feel so loved that she almost teared up again.

Nudging her lips open with his tongue he plunged his mouth onto hers, kissing her so sexually that she would have fainted if she weren’t already lying on the ground. When he felt her softly whimper into his mouth he moved his lips down, trailing them down her neck while his hand travelled up to cup her breast, teasing her as he lightly flicked her nipple with his thumb.

“Gene”, she gasped, as he felt her wanting to press her legs together to release some of the built-up tension.

“Yes baby?” He asked silently as his lips moved down her chest, replacing his thumb. Burying her hands in his hair she whined as his tongue slid hard over her nipple as he sucked it deeply into his mouth.

“I don’t think I’m up for this now.”

Letting her nipple pop from his mouth after he dragged on it one more time, he moved up again, gazing into her eyes so intensely that she hardly noticed his hand travelling down between her legs. But as he moved his fingers through her slick folds in a slow rhythm she had trouble staying still.

“Yeah, feels like it will be a challenge.” He said in a low voice all the while he didn’t stop his caresses. Judy couldn’t keep her eyes away from his.

“Please”, she tried again. “I don’t wanna come like this.”

“Okay”, he grinned before he kissed her. “I’ll try and keep that in mind.”

She couldn’t believe it, when he ignored her and slid back down, his lips not leaving her body until he reached her mound. Carefully bending her legs, he locked his arms around her thighs as he got comfortable between them. Gene noticed her breathing starting to quicken as her body tensed up. Placing soft kisses along her lower belly he waited for her to calm down a bit before he’d take the next step. When she lowered her hand to him and her fingers started caressing his scalp, he knew that he got her where he wanted her.

“Don’t worry, I’m not gonna let you come.” He murmured, his voice vibrating against her entrance as he moved his head back between her legs.

Judy wanted to answer something, but it got lost in a gasp as he plunged his lips onto her. His tongue moved over her in such a slow and agonizingly good way that she couldn’t help but abandon herself to him. Keeping one hand in his hair, her other moved out to the side, searching for something to hold on to.

“I love doing that to you.” He said in a husky voice before he plunged his tongue into her opening, making her whimper. “You’re so delicious.”

When he heard her moans getting louder, and she started to roll her hips against his mouth, trying to meet every suck of his lips, Gene stopped his rhythm, letting her calm down again before he started all over again. It was never enough to make her let go completely, but that’s what made her almost delirious. Knowing that she wouldn’t endure another round of this she tugged on his arms.

“I can’t … please stop.”

Gene slid his tongue along her one more time before he looked up at her. He could see the desperate look in her eyes and knew that she wouldn’t be able to hold out much longer, and frankly neither would he. His balls were about to explode and he was so hard that he felt like he could come just from staring at her. He wanted the release just as much as she did.  
Moving away from her core, he wanted to bring his body back up, but she was faster and took hold of his wrists before she brought her hands up to his chest and pushed him, so he lay on his back. Before he had the chance to stop her she straddled him.

“That wasn’t part of my plan.” Gene chuckled as he placed his hands on top of her thighs, his fingers lightly caressing her.

“I don’t give a fuck about your plan, darling.” She returned, closing her eyes as she still tried to regain her composure, but a smiled played on her lips. “It’s my turn now.”

“Oh is it?” He asked, raising his eyebrow.

“Mm hm” Judy hummed as her hand wandered to his hardness. Surrounding it with her fingers she started caressing him.

Gene tried keeping his eyes locked with hers but when she shifted on him a little, bracing herself on his chest with one hand while she moved his erection up and down her soaked folds, he couldn’t hold out any longer and groaned out loud, tilting his head back. As he felt some pressure on his chest he looked back up again, just in time to see her sliding down on him. She was already so tight around him that it took everything he got not to come right away. This wasn’t what he had in mind. He wanted to stay in control, but as he leaned his head back against the cushions and felt her starting to move on him, he gave more and more of the control over to her. She looked so gorgeous, illuminated by the fire behind her, as she rid him in a slow rhythm, rolling her hips against his and moving up and down as she braced herself against his body. The soft cries that escaped her mouth and the way she closed her eyes as she put her head back as she sunk back down on him was so sensual, turning him on all the more. But Gene wanted her closer, he needed to feel her body against his. Bending his legs a little, so he could lean forward he brought his arms around her back. Judy was relieved that he moved closer to her. She wasn’t sure how much longer she would be able to hold out for. But the way he was moving against her now, told her it wouldn’t be long. Cradling her cheek with one hand he started to kiss her, his tongue mimicking his deep, lingering thrusts.

“Please, come for me.”

Her words made him moan into her mouth and just as she tightened her muscles around him while she sank down on him on more time, she felt him twitch inside of her as he pushed up against her most sensitive spot, making her come instantly with a loud cry. He groaned out loud against her lips as he felt himself starting to come as well and shot deeply inside of her. The way she felt him jerk over and over again made her orgasm seem never ending.

Barely being able to hold on anymore, Gene carefully leaned back against the pillows while he kept her body on top of him.

“I love you.” Judy purred as her head rested against the crook of his neck. He was still inside of her, and it made her feel so full.

Shifting a bit, Gene reached out his hand and grabbed the blanket to spread it out over them.

“You make me the happiest man on Earth, my love.” He answered before he kissed her forehead, making her smile.

______________

Judy was lying in bed for hours now, but couldn’t even think about sleep. She just tossed and tossed. Actually, she had planned on telling Vincente yesterday. She had tried to start the conversation a couple of times, but the words just wouldn’t get over her lips. After the last try she just excused herself to the bathroom, thinking she was about to throw up from all the pent-up anxiety. Tonight was no success either. Judy knew that waiting wouldn’t make anything better, but this seemed to be more than she could cope with. She wanted to just block it out, shove it all away, in the hope that everything would take care of itself … Unfortunately, this didn’t seem to be that kind of situation.  
After another hour of tossing from one side to the other Judy kicked back the covers accompanied by and annoyed groan and got out of bed. Walking down the stairs she made her way into the kitchen. After she’d found some left over ice cream in the freezer, she went through the cupboards in search for some chocolate syrup to help with her nerves. Getting on her toes she found it way in the back but as she reached for it, she knocked over a tin can of cookies, that fell to the floor with a shattering noise.

“Goddammit.” She hissed, and knelt down, trying to pick everything up.

When everything was back at its place she grabbed the syrup bottle and poured a generous amount over her ice cream bowl before she dug in. Surprisingly, this did help a bit, she thought and smiled to herself as she dipped the spoon into the bowl, readying it for another bite.

“Can’t sleep either?”

The sudden voice behind her made her almost choke on her ice cream, and she let out a strangled cough before she turned around. Vincente was standing in front of the isle, looking at her.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to frighten you.”

“Uhm, no, I’m not that tired, I guess.” She uttered as she gazed down into her bowl.

“Well, good thing it’s Sunday.” He said, smiling at her.

“Yeah, I suppose.” Judy braced herself on the counter and hopped up, before she reached out for her bowl again. “How come you couldn’t sleep? Doesn’t seem like you.”

He stared at her for a moment before he answered.

“Had a few things on my mind.”

“Yeah, me too.” 

She took in a deep breath, wondering if a better time would come to tell him about everything than now.

“What is it?”

Probably not.

“Vincente?” She asked, her voice slightly faltering.

“Yes?”

The apprehensive tone of his voice wasn’t hard to miss as he circled the isle to get closer to her.

“I really need to speak to you … In fact, I’ve been meaning to do so for a while now, but it’s just … there wasn’t …” Her words got lost in a sigh, as she gazed down. This was even harder than she thought it would be.

“You’re pregnant.” It didn’t sound like a question.

Her eyes locked with his as she stared at him. He knew.

“How, how long have you known?” She asked silently.

“I figured you were for a while now.” He answered quite matter-of-factly

When she didn’t give him a reaction he walked up to her and took her hands in his.

“When are you due?”

“July.” She answered in a whisper, causing him to sigh.

“Judy, I’m not a fool. You’ve been acting weird for months now … and I’ve witnessed this behavior once before as you know.”

She dared look at him.

“Well, I haven’t been sick as much this time.”

“I know, but it still wasn’t hard to overlook.”

They paused for a little while, and he let go off her hand to lean back against the counter.

“I also know it isn’t mine … that’s why you wanted to sleep with that time, right?”

The disappointed way in which he said it made a feeling of guilt take over.

“Is that why you told me we’re done? So I’d have to stand here alone?” Panic took hold of her … What would she do if he were to turn his back on her?

He let out a deep sigh before he continued.

“No, Judy! I did it because we both know that nothing can come of this … I realized that, too. We don’t love each other in that way anymore.”

Vincente pushed himself away from the counter and reached out for her hands again.

“And I won’t let you be alone.”

Judy’s eyes darted up, meeting his.

“You’ll help me?” She dared ask.

He nodded.

“Like I said, I’ll be there for you as long as you need me.”

Hearing him say the words he told her the last time they talked brought tears to her eyes. Only then she realized that he had tried to get something out of her all along.

“Oh, darling … you wanted to talk to me about it then, didn’t you?”

He squeezed her hands tighter and nodded.

“Why didn’t you tell me this sooner, Judy?”

“I didn’t know how … I was so afraid of the outcome. I even considered … well, you know. But I couldn’t do it. Not again.”

“I would never ask that of you, sweetheart … okay?” 

Judy nodded and she tried to stifle a sob. Moving closer to her, he folded her into his arms, trying to comfort her.

“So, how do you feel now?”

When he stepped back Judy let out a breath, feeling like every burden fell from her shoulders at that moment. Even the studio’s opinion wasn’t relevant anymore now that she knew she would have his support. They would have to comply.

“Better.” She answered with a smile on her face.

“Good.”

Judy glanced over at her ice cream bowl only to find out that it had turned into molten goo.

“Would you put that in the sink for me?” She asked, holding it out to him.

“Sure. Don’t you want me to make you another one?”

“No, I’m good. I just needed it for my nerves.”

“Well, I’m glad that they’re all settled then.”

“Thank you.”

He smiled at her for a moment, but Judy could tell that something was still bothering him, so she waited for him to go on.

“Does Gene know?”

Judy nodded slowly.

“Yes, I told him after Frank’s party … I had to.”

“Of course. How does he feel about it?”

“Happy.” She wasn’t able to hide her smile when she thought back to his reaction. “He really wants me to have it.”

“That’s good.”

Judy could tell he meant what he said, but that didn’t mean she wasn’t able to see the remainder of melancholy that was still edged on his face, making it obvious that he didn’t want to hear any more details about Gene right now.

“And don’t worry about the studio, dear.” He continued. “We will talk to LB together.”

Hearing him affirm the thoughts she already had in her mind meant a lot to her.

“Thank you Vincente.”

“That’s alright.”

Judy got off the counter and took hold of his hands.

“No, I truly mean it. Thank you. For everything.”

He brought her hands up to his mouth and kissed each one before he gave her an acknowledging smile.

“Think you can sleep now?”

“I hope so.” She replied, shrugging her shoulders.

“Come.”

They walked out of the kitchen and up the stairs. When they got to their old bedroom he leaned forward to place a soft kiss against her cheek.

“Goodnight, dear. Please try and sleep a bit. You really need to get some rest.”

But just as he wanted to turn around and walk away Judy held him back.

“Would you please stay with me tonight?”

She could see that he was hesitating.

“I don’t wanna be alone tonight … the bed is so empty, and it’s way too quiet.”

“Are you trying to tell me you actually miss my snoring?” He teased her, making her laugh out loud.

“No, definitely not … but, please. Would you?”

He sighed but nodded and followed her into the bedroom. They got under the covers together, and he held out his arm, so she could snuggle up to him.

“Sleep well sweetie.”

“Goodnight.” She yawned.

All of a sudden feeling rather tired she could tell that it wouldn’t take long now before she fell asleep. She had a broad smile on her face, thinking about the immeasurable relief their conversation had brought her. Covering her belly with her hand, she allowed herself to be happy without feeling guilty for the first time in a long time, as she slowly drifted off.

______________

February 1948

“Hey Judy, wait … will you join me for lunch on our last day?” Peter asked as he tried to catch up with her as she walked off the sound stage.

“I’d love to, darling, I just need to get something from my dressing room real quick. Meet you there in a bit, alright?”

“Sure I’ll save a seat for you.”

“Do that.” She said, smiling at him before she turned around the corner.

When she got to her dressing room and closed the door she leaned against it and let out a deep sigh, still not quite believing that this would be her last day on set. She actually made it. And thanks to Vincente everything was cut and dried, and she needn’t worry about a thing anymore. Mr. Mayer was out of his mind at first but eventually could be convinced that there would be ways to work around this. Judy wouldn’t be able to make her guest appearance in Words and Music, and of course, The Barkleys of Broadway in which she was supposed to star in alongside Fred wouldn’t be possible as well. In fact, she was rather relieved about it. It would have been another big musical production, meaning constant hours of work and exhaustion. The goal was that Judy would return to the studio in October and to do a picture for the Pasternak unit. And while that still seemed like an awful short time to be on leave, she accepted it for now. It certainly was better than nothing, and she was extremely grateful that everything went out the way it did and no one was unsympathetic about it. Actually, it was quite the opposite. After everyone that needed to know was informed about Judy’s situation they tried working around her, pulling her scenes to the front and took the pressure of wherever possible.  
It also helped to know that things between the men in her life were straightened out after Gene pulled Vincente aside, so they could have a conversation about how things would be in the future. All three agreed that it would be best for Judy to stay with Vincente for the time being but that Gene would be in the picture as much as possible. But the reality was different. Their schedules were really tight and ever since Gene returned to work finding time for each other was a challenge. 

After she freshened up, Judy made her way to the commissary, her eyes wandering up and down the large hall in an attempt to spot Peter. Finally, she saw him waving at her, but he wasn’t the only one who caught her attention. She enjoyed seeing him more often now that he was back filming and sometimes had lunch with him if their schedules allowed it, but it didn’t seem like today would be that kind of day since he was already occupied with Lana Turner who was sitting next to him. They were caught up in a conversation, and he didn’t notice her as she got closer to them. Judy couldn’t help the wave of jealousy slowly rising up in her. She liked Lana but as she was standing directly behind them and Lana reached out her hand to place it on Gene’s shoulder as she put her head back and laughed, Judy just wanted to tear down her hairdo, intricately made up for her role. Not being in the mood for any small talk she quickly went past their table, when she heard her voice,

“Judy!”

Reluctantly Judy turned around to face them, trying to put on a cheerful smile, though she wasn’t able to tear her eyes away from Lana’s hand that was still resting on Gene’s arm.

“Lana, dear how are you?” She tried in an overly friendly voice.

Gene gave her an apologizing look, but Judy didn’t pay attention to him anymore as she seemed to kill Lana with her eyes, certainly not mirroring the tone of her voice. Lana wasn’t impressed by it, though.

“Oh, good, everything’s just splendid. We’re having so much fun on this picture.” She gazed over at Gene. “I can’t remember the last time I had such a charming partner.” Her hand landed on his and Judy’s eyes widened before she tried regaining her composure.

“Yah, well isn’t he a dear.”

The way Gene’s lips turned into a smirk as he looked at her in amusement made her want to punch him, too.

“Why don’t you join us?”

“Oh, I’d love to, but someone’s waiting for me. Enjoy your lunch.” She managed to get out before she turned around and left.

The encounter made lunch with Peter much less enjoyable. She tried giving him her attention, but her eyes often drifted off as she peeked over his shoulder to watch them. It wasn’t that she didn’t trust Gene, but she wasn’t sure about Lana. She already had a feeling that something like this would happen when she found out that Gene and her would be working together. It was easy to stir her jealousy these days. Judy had hoped that she would be able to keep these worries locked away, but it turned out to be harder than she thought.

After they’d finished eating, she linked arms with Peter as they left the commissary. She kept an eye out for Gene, but he was already gone.

“You alright Judy?” Peter asked as he squeezed her hand.

“Hm? Oh, yes, just a little tired I guess.”

“Yeah I figured you might be … your mind seemed to be somewhere else.”

“Sorry, Peter.”

“No, don’t be. That’s not why I said it. I just wanted to check you’re okay. Think you’ll need a longer break? I could tell them to wait.”

“No, thank you darling, I appreciate it, but it’s fine, really it is.”

Judy wanted to add something, but she was taken off guard when someone took hold of her free hand, making her turn around in confusion.

“Hi darling. Do you have a moment?”

“What is it Gene? We gotta get back.”

“I don’t think we were done talking.”

“I don’t thing we even started. You seemed to be rather occupied.”

Peter had already let go off her arm and was now observing them.

“Well, you didn’t give me a chance to speak.”

Judy let out an annoyed groan before she turned around to Peter.

“Pete, this may take a while … Why don’t you go ahead? I’ll catch up.”

“Alright, I’ll tell them to wait.” He said and walked off.

“Well then?” She said raising her eyebrow. “What was it you wanted to say?”

“Darling”, he murmured, his eyes all soft as he reached for her hand. “We were just discussing a scene.”

“Whatever Gene, I don’t care what you two were doing.”

“Why didn’t you join us?”

“I had plans.”

She cursed at herself as she started to get all choked up … damn hormones. She cleared her throat.

“Look, can we do this and walk? I don’t wanna be late for my last scene.”

Gene could tell she was still pissed even though she didn’t admit it, but he wouldn’t let her sulk and just continued talking to her as he normally would. After a few minutes, he saw her smile returning. When she started teasing him about his costume, telling him that he looked ridiculous in it, he knew her mood started to lighten and by the time they reached the sound stage he had her laughing again.

“Would you like to come with me?”

“I’d love to, but I need to get back myself.”

“Okay.”

“Do you have some time later?”

“Yes, but I can’t tell you how long I’m gonna be.”

“I can wait.”

“Will you?”

“Mm hm.”

The sweet look she gave him made his heart leap. If there weren’t so many people around he would have pulled her around the corner and kissed her right there and then. Instead, he just leaned in and placed a kiss against her cheek, letting his lips stay there slightly longer than appropriate.

“See you later then.”

“Will you come to my dressing room when you’re done?” He murmured into her ear.

“You bet. Bye bye, darling.” She purred, pressing her body into his slightly.

The way her voice vibrated against his cheek as she pressed her body slightly into his before she kissed him one more time made his dick hard almost immediately. She’d walked away before he could respond anything.

After he was done shooting for the day Gene retreated into his dressing room and changed out of his costume and got rid of the damn wig. Stretching out on his daybed his mind wandered off to the plans he had for the rest of the day. He wanted to take her out some place nice, since it was her final day of shooting. Gene was so relieved that this day had finally arrived … He had been anxious every day for the last month. He was aware that they knew about it and tried to make everything as comfortable for her as possible, but it still unsettled him. Knowing that she could relax now for the remainder of her pregnancy certainly put his mind at ease.  
Reaching for his book he tried to read a few pages while he waited for Judy when there was a knock at the door. He looked at his watch ... he certainly didn’t expect her to be done this soon.

“Come in.” He shouted as he stayed lying on the bed.

“I didn’t know your day was that rough.”

Putting his book to the side he quickly sat up as he heard Lana’s voice.

“No, stay there. It looked comfortable.” She said as she walked into the room. “I didn’t mean to stay long anyway, I just wanted to give you this.” She said, handing him his script “You left it on set.”

“Oh jeez, thanks, I totally forgot.” He answered as he leapt off the bed.

“Yeah, I could tell your mind was somewhere else today.” She laughed.

“Ya, sorry about that.” He chuckled as he thought back on how they needed to do the scene over and over again. It certainly wasn’t like him but with all the anticipation, he had trouble concentrating.

“No, don’t be, it was fun to see you not having your shit together for once … That’s usually me.” He knew she was hinting at how she had trouble staying serious during takes and how that would annoy him.

“Won’t argue with you there.” He teased.

“Oh you.” She said, slightly punching his shoulder. “What are you still doing here anyways?”

Gene didn’t know what to tell her and tried thinking about a believable explanation, but nothing came to his mind.

“Well, I …”

“You were waiting for your script to come marching back in here?”

The way she winked at him made him chuckle. She probably knew that there was some sort of explanation to the story that he didn’t want to share, but she wouldn’t push him for an answer. Gene liked that easy-going side about her and while she was quite openly flirtatious from time to time it was never in a blatant way.

“Exactly.”

“Well, good thing it worked out then.”

Gene gave her a smile.

“Alright, I guess I should get going, bye darling.” She leaned in to kiss him goodbye. 

“Bye, see you tomorrow.” He answered and opened the door for her. But as he did so they were met by Judy who just walked up to his door.

Judging by how jealous she had already been at lunch he could only imagine what was going through her head right at that moment. The look she gave him only confirmed his apprehension.

“Oh, hello again.” Lana chimed as she left his room. “We hardly saw each other these last few weeks and now twice in a day, how lovely is that.” Before Judy could say anything she already found herself in Lana’s warm embrace.

“Yes, I was just on my way out ... I, I just thought I’d say goodbye, since, well … I won’t be around here for a while.”

“Oh, yes I’ve heard.” Of course, she did. In that regard the studio had been as reliable as ever. “I’m so happy for you honey.” She hugged her again. “Sorry but I gotta run. We need to catch up soon okay?”

“Would love that, bye bye.” Judy managed to get out.

Watching Lana as she turned around the corner, she even forgot that Gene was still standing there but was reminded by it when she felt him reach for her hand. Judy gave him an irritated look before she pulled her hand away from him.

“Won’t you come inside?”

“Ha, what do you think?”

Judy felt her insides clenching as she tried to stop from crying. She knew that she was completely unreasonable, but her feelings seemed to take over at that moment, making her feel helpless.

“Judy please.” He tried taking her hand again, but she didn’t let him.

“Don’t. touch. me.” She said, her voice all silent.

Gene wouldn’t have any of it though and took her by the arm to get her inside.

“What are you doing?” She snapped after he’d managed to close the door behind her.

“I won’t be discussing this kinda thing outside.”

“Well, whatever, I don’t wanna discuss it at all.”

“She was just giving me something Judy.”

“Oh, I bet she did.”

“My fucking script.” He said and pointed to it as it was sitting on his desk.

“Good, is that all then? I need to get home to my daughter.”

Before Gene could answer she had already left his room. He quickly grabbed his things from the coat rack before he followed her outside.

“Judy wait.”

“No!”

But he caught up with her. No matter what she would throw at him, he knew he would be able to turn the situation around. After all he didn’t mind a challenge. As fast as she could get angry it usually didn’t take long before it subsided and now with her being pregnant these kinds of arguments only seemed to increase. He was used to it by now.

“You said you were free.”

“Ya well, I changed my mind.”

Judy quickened her pace and walked in front of him. He let her as he tried his best not to chuckle. If it was possible, it seemed like he loved her even more when she was angry with him. Besides, it wouldn’t be possible for her to leave anyway.

By the time Gene got to the parking lot, he could already see Judy searching for her car. When she spotted him she marched back in his direction, her face even a darker tinge of red now than before.

“Are you looking for anything in particular?” He asked with a grin on his face.

“What did you do to it?”

“Not me, Vincente. He knows you’re not coming home tonight.”

Judy let out an incredulous laugh.

“You two had this all planned out? Are you best friends now or what? How lovely … why don’t we all move in together? You might wanna ask Betsy to join us as well.”

Gene got closer to her.

“I told him I wanted to celebrate with you. He understood. He said he would take care of your car. Which apparently he did.”

“I cannot believe this.” She said, shaking her head. “And what if I don’t want to go with you? Because I don’t.”

“Oh, I don’t know … seems like you’ll have to stay here.” He teased her.

“Believe me, I won’t have any trouble finding someone who will take me wherever I want to go.”

“If that’s what you prefer.”

Turning away from him Judy let out a deep groan. There wasn’t anyone on Earth who could make her this angry, and seeing his smug grin made it even worse. But most of all it frustrated her that it seemed like she loved him all the more for it. After a moment she felt him walking closer to her, slightly leaning against her from behind, making her suck in her breath.

“I suppose you would miss out on something, though.” He whispered into her ear and her body tingled all over, as she thought about what he wanted to do to her.

“Sounds like someone has a high opinion of himself.” Her softer voice told him he almost had her where he wanted her.

The way she felt him chuckle into her hair only made it worse. He definitely knew how to play all the right strings when it came to her. Slowly she turned around again, letting out a sigh.

“Okay then … But this doesn’t mean that I’m not still angry with you.”

Taking her hand he lifted it to his lips and kissed it.

“I’ll take you any way I can get you.”

Judy let him lead her to his car. After he got into the driver’s seat he gave her a triumphant grin.

“If you keep looking at me like that imma punch you in the face … and then I’ll get out of here.”

He couldn’t help but laugh.

“I better get going then.”

As he drove down the lot Judy reached out her hand and turned on the radio, before she gazed out of the window, listening to the soft jazz music that filled the vehicle.

“Don’t wanna talk to me?”

“Surprised? It’s not like I didn’t warn you.”

Judy felt him tense, but he didn’t respond and let her be during the short ride over to his home. When they got there, she was a little irritated that he stayed in his seat.

“What are you doing? Got another one in there and don’t want me to go inside?”

She grasped the handle and got out of the car before he had the chance to answer.

“Judy, don’t you think that’s enough?” She heard him from behind her.

“Why don’t you let me decide when I’ve had enough.” She snapped at him.

Fiddling with his keys Gene opened the door and held out his hand, gesturing for her to go in. She let him take of her coat before she walked away from him into the kitchen. By the time he followed her she had already poured herself a generous shot of his whiskey, making him almost furious. He was aware that it was normal for pregnant women to have the occasional drink, but he just didn’t see how it could be harmless.

“What are you doing?”

“Settling my nerves.” She said before taking a big gulp, emptying more than half of it.

He walked over to her, yanking the glass out of her hand before he poured the rest of it into the sink.

“Excuse me!”

“You shouldn’t be doing that.”

“It’s perfectly fine.”

“Not it’s not … and certainly not something that strong. I’m not comfortable with it.”

“Well, and I’m not comfortable with Lana Turner in your dressing room and look how that worked out.” She said as she walked past him into the living room.

“Judy, would you listen to yourself?”

As she turned around to him, he saw the uncertainty in her eyes. She got all worked up about it and now didn’t know how to get out of her frenzy.

“I bet you kissed her already.”

“Yes, I had to for the scene.”

He tried suppressing a smirk, with only minimal success. Judy construed it the wrong way, though.

“You enjoyed it didn’t you?”

“Well, I’ve had worse.”

If she was being an ass, so could he.

“Oh, go to hell!” Judy yelled at him. “And don’t you think you’re the only one I enjoyed kissing on screen. I’ve had plenty of good partners who knew what they were doing.”

“Oh, I’m sure you taught them right.” He said in a low voice as he got closer to her.

Only when she grasped the wall Judy noticed that she’d been walking backwards.

“They didn’t need any help.”

Her voice got quieter as his body touched hers.

“Not like me, you mean?”

His body was pressing against hers in such a good way as his hands moved around her waist.

“You didn’t either.” She whispered as his lips, almost touching hers now sent a tingle through her body. “I just wanted to kiss you.”

“Oh, you did?”

“Mm hm.” Judy nodded as his lips ran along hers, causing her to close her eyes, before he leaned in to kiss her, but just as she wanted to give in and let him take over, her mind intervened, reminding her that she was still angry with him. Placing her hands on his shoulders, she pushed him away from her.

“You can’t just kiss me like that and believe this will make it all okay - it’s not that easy.”

“It’s not?” He asked with a twinkle in his eyes.

“No!” Judy shouted before she tried escaping his hold, but couldn’t as his body still pinned her against the wall.

Instead of letting her go he moved up his hands to the first button of her dress.

“Don’t you dare.”

Gene looked her directly in the eyes but ignored her glare as he swiftly undid the first two buttons.

“What? You were the one who said kissing wouldn’t solve anything.” He said in a low voice, all the while his fingers kept fiddling with the buttons on her dress. “And I must admit, I feel the same way.”

Judy lost count of how many buttons were left, but she didn’t care anymore when she felt his hands move into the dress, touching the bare skin above her panties. Gene hadn’t been with her in over a month and was a little taken aback by the obvious changes. One wouldn’t notice when she wore clothes, but she was definitely starting to show now. Letting his hands wander over her body, he felt her muscles relaxing, as her breathing grew heavier, and he prayed she wouldn’t push him away again. As he gently cupped her full breasts, Judy leaned her head back, letting out a low moan.

“I really hate you sometimes, you know.” She breathed.

Gene chuckled and brought one hand up to her neck before he trailed small kisses along it, stopping when he reached her mouth.

“Right back at ya.” He whispered against her lips.

Judy thought he was going to kiss her and closed her eyes, waiting in anticipation, but he didn’t and his lips travelled down again instead, pulling her dress from her shoulders as he did so. Letting it fall to the ground he stepped back a little. The small sound she made when she felt him moving away from her told him everything he needed to know, but he wanted to hear it from her.

“Still want me to stop?”

“No.” Judy whined.

Giving her a smirk Gene let his hands move up over her stockings and garters before he unclasped them. When his fingers grazed up her inner thigh and into the leg of her panties Judy let out a whimper as brought her arms up around his neck. He found her soaking wet already and almost let out a moan himself.

“What do you want me to do?” Gene asked as he moved two fingers up and down her folds, circling her bud with his thumb.

Judy closed her eyes as her body took in every sensation when she realized he said something to her.

“Huh?”

“What do you want me to do?” He asked again before he placed a soft kiss against her slightly parted lips.

“I don’t care.” She breathed and wanted to lean in again, but he didn’t let her and instead brought his hands behind her back to unclasp her bra before he pulled it down. Her nipples were already hard. Hooking his fingers into the hem of her panties he pulled those down as well, leaving her standing almost naked in front of him except for her stockings. Gene had to swallow hard as he gazed at her naked body. She’d never looked more sexy, and he wanted to take her right away but even more he wanted to show her how much he desired her, only her. Judy’s hands tensed around his shoulders as she waited for him to go on.

“Just relax baby.” He said before he leaned and kissed her so deeply she almost swooned. But before she knew it he moved down again, teasing her with his lips until he found her breasts. Letting his tongue run over the taut nipple repeatedly he had her moaning within seconds. Judy’s fingers tightened around his neck as he closed his lips around it and sucked it deeply into his mouth.

“Oh God.”

He stayed there a while longer before he repeated the same thing on the other side, he couldn’t get enough of the taste of her. Eventually, he moved down, covering her stomach with kisses until he reached her mound. Judy gazed down at him, knowing what he was about to do. She was more than ready for it. Taking hold of her thigh she let him place it over his shoulder as he brought his mouth between her legs. When his lips touched her she moaned loudly as she felt her pent-up desire being relieved. Gene started out slow, placing feather soft kisses against her folds, letting his tongue run over her bud with gentle strokes but this only seemed to turn her on more, as she clawed her fingers into his shoulders. Judy felt him slowly building up his rhythm as his tongue slid in between her folds, and up until he reached her pearl, placing the pad of his tongue tightly against it before sucking it deeply into his mouth. She thought she would die of the sensation, and arched her back of the wall as she moaned out her pleasure. Placing his hand on her stomach he made sure that she wouldn’t escape. All the while he kept his mouth on her, intensifying his rhythm with every stroke of his tongue.

“Gene, please.” She moaned as she felt her climax building, making him groan as well.

The soft vibrations of his voice against her bud and the way his tongue swept over her continuously drove her over the edge as she released an orgasm so strong that her legs gave in. Gene reacted instantly and caught her in his arms, moving his hand between her legs to extend her pleasure, leaving his fingers completely soaked in her desire. Seeing and feeling her like this made him so hard it hurt, and he could feel his erection straining against the inside of his pants, begging for release.

“Oh my God.” Judy breathed as she let her forehead rest against his. She could feel his hardness pressing against her belly and she didn’t want to make him wait any longer, she wanted him to fuck her, to feel him release inside of her. Gene let out a strangled groan as he felt her undoing his belt and pants before she slid her hand inside, releasing him. As she milked him with a few strokes he threw his head back letting out a gasp. He couldn’t hold out any longer. Picking her up in one swift motion Gene pressed her against the wall, as he led himself to her entrance. He pushed inside of her with one powerful thrust, causing her to let out a surprised gasp. Immediately her walls tightened around him as he was encompassed by her warm wetness. He needed to take a moment to calm down as the sensation was so strong that he felt like he would come right away. Placing her hand against the side of his face, Judy softly stroked him, as he was breathing hard against her lips.

“Hi.” She cooed, grinning at him as she tightened her muscles around him.

“Oh babe.” He moaned and picked up his rhythm, thrusting into her deeply with every stroke.

There would be no one ever who could arouse her as much as she did, of that he was certain. The way she arched her back off the wall as she met him on every stroke made him want to get lost inside of her forever. Gene wanted to let go so bad but when he looked at her, he was reminded that this was supposed to be about her. He didn’t just want to fuck her against the wall … not this time. He wanted to show her what she meant to him, leaving no doubt about that in her mind. Placing one hand around her bum and the other around her back he held her close to him as he walked out of the room.

“What are you doing?”

Judy was visibly confused.

“This isn’t right.”

Placing her on the bed, Judy groaned desperately as he pulled out of her. He got rid of his clothes in a haste before he followed her onto the bed. Only then Judy lay back down, allowing herself to relax. Opening her legs he lay down between them as he placed kisses along her thigh, over her stomach and her breasts until he reached her neck. He was placed perfectly against her entrance and when she felt him suck on her neck he entered her. Thrusting forward a bit more with each stroke until he was as deep inside her as possible but even then he tried pushing in further. Judy moaned out aloud feeling him like this and wrapped her legs tightly around his waist. Gene brought his hand up to cradle her face as he leaned over her, finding her lips with his. He pulled and tugged at her lips, letting his tongue slide over hers all the while he didn’t stop his deep, lingering strokes. Pressing her breast against him as she arched her back Judy cried out her pleasure. Gene loved hearing how much he could please her and placed another kiss against her slightly parted lips. As they parted she opened her eyes, gazing back at him. She could see all his love and admiration for her in them. It completely overwhelmed her and she quickly swallowed back some tears. Reaching down Gene took hold of her hips to keep her closer to him as he quickened his pace slightly, making her reach her arms out to the sides to clasp the sheets. Judy couldn’t remember a time when she’d been this loud. She almost screamed as his swollen head hit the perfect spot over and over again, pushing hard against it, making her feel like she vibrated from within.

“Gene.” She gasped.

“Right there?”

“Yes … yes.” She purred.

Gene didn’t know how he managed to keep going. It seemed liked she got tighter with every stroke as her orgasm started to build, making it almost unbearable for him. As she arched her back one more time he brought his arm around her waist, he could keep her in place perfectly for him as his thrusts deepened.

“You feel so fucking good baby.”

His words drove her over the edge. Her body convulsed uncontrollably as her hips rolled against his, meeting his strokes and he felt her thighs starting to shake around him. Her cry got lost in his mouth as he brought his lips to hers, kissing her hungrily through her orgasm. As he quickened his pace he finally allowed himself to let go as well. It felt like it went on and on as he shot inside of her with a loud desperate groan.

Burying his face against her chest, Gene slowly calmed down. When he felt her softly stroking his neck he propped himself up on his arms and looked down at her, finding her crying in silence.  
Sliding up he again he placed his hand against her cheek, so she would have to look at him.

“What is it, honey?”

“I love you.” She answered very silently, her voice almost breaking.

Gene smiled and leaned in to kiss her, making her cry even more.

“I’m such a mess.” She said but he just shook his head.

“You’re beautiful.” He returned as he stroked her face, letting his thumb run along her plush lower lip before he leaned in one more time.

“Judy?”

“Yes?”

“You know that you have nothing to worry about right? I’m not the least bit interested in Lana, or anyone but you for that matter.”

“She is a friend … but I know how she can be. She certainly wouldn’t turn down an opportunity”

“There’ll be no opportunities.”

She tried smiling at him, but it didn’t really get through.

“Talk to me.”

“I hate the secrets … I hate to pretend. I hate that people can’t know about us.”

“I do too Judy. I so wish that things were different, but I know who we’re doing it for.”

He kissed her before he slid down along her body. Letting his hands rest on her belly he placed soft kisses against it.

“This makes it all worth it.”

When he saw her starting to cry again he moved back up, placing the soft covers over them before he spooned her, bringing his arm around her waist.

“I’m so glad it’s all over now. From this angle it seems like I wouldn’t have been able to cover it even one more day.” She said, sniffing her nose.

“I love it.” Gene said, moving his hand a little lower on her belly.

Placing her hand on top of his she asked him,

“Do you want a boy or a girl?”

“I don’t care … but I have this feeling it’s gonna be a girl.”

“I think I’ll have to disappoint you, darling. It doesn’t feel like a girl.”

“We’ll see.”

All of a sudden Judy let out a big yawn as she started to feel drowsy.

“Tired?”

“Exhausted.” She giggled.

“Sleep a little.”

“I thought you wanted to celebrate with me.”

“Oh we will. But we have the whole evening left.” He said before he pressed a kiss against the back of her neck.

“Okay.” She purred as she snuggled closer against him. “But don’t you dare get out of this bed without me.” She warned him, making him chuckle.

“Promise.”

It only took a couple of minutes before he felt her doze off in his arms and he gently kissed her shoulder before he closed his eyes as well.

______________

Late June 1948

Judy was propped up against the cushions as she was lying on the sofa, completely exhausted. She couldn’t think about a time when she had been this uncomfortable, but the cool air that the fan blew in her face offered a little relieve. She was so done being pregnant. It was much easier with Liza, as she was born in March when it wasn’t as warm yet. But it wasn’t only the heat that bothered her … her day-to-day life bored her. She missed being able to go out at night, seeing her friends. Heck, she would haven even preferred an exhausting 12 hour day at work right now. Just anything remotely exciting would do. Normally she spent most of her days with Liza and loved their bonding time, but over the last month, as things got tougher she spent increasingly more time with the nanny or Kay, if she had time. Today was such a day. In fact, she would spend the whole weekend over at Kay’s, who had simply told her that it would be good if Judy had another weekend just to relax before the baby arrived and that she wouldn’t take no for an answer. Judy felt bad about leaving her daughter and wished that Liza were a little older, so she would be able to explain everything to her better. She knew that mommy would be having another baby and that she’d be a big sister soon, but Judy wasn’t sure she understood what that really meant. It worried her how she would react when the baby was actually there. Trying to close her eyes, Judy tried to relax for a bit, seeing as there was nothing else to do anyways.

“There you go darling.”

“Huh?” She murmured, pulling the pillow off her face.

“The iced tea you asked for.” Vincente said as he stood in front of the sofa.

“Oh, I forgot about that … thanks.” Judy said as she reached out her hand to take it. “Ugh, I wanted the sweet kind.” She said, twisting her mouth.

Vincente let out a deep sigh.

“We’re all out. Do you want me to get you something else?”

“No, never mind …”

Sitting down on the other end of the sofa he lifted her feet, placing them on his lap.

“How are you feeling?”

“Oh, just marvelous.” She groaned, making him chuckle. “I’m glad I’m still able to amuse.”

“Sorry, dear … I’ll take off soon, okay?”

“I thought you said you’d stay here today.”

“I’m sorry, but something came up.”

“Well, can’t you cancel it? I don’t wanna be alone. I’m bored enough as it is.”

“I’m afraid I can’t. I won’t be too long, though. Besides I -”

The sound of the doorbell interrupted him.

“Sorry, I’ll be right back.”

Judy sighed frustrated as he stood up, leaving her alone. Closing her eyes again she tried to not get emotional. She didn’t want to spend the afternoon by herself. With Vincente she would at least have someone to talk to. Only a few minutes later she heard footsteps approaching the living room.

“Who was it?”

“I’d rather not repeat the name you last used for me.”

Judy opened her eyes immediately at the sound of his voice and tried to sit up.

“Gene.”

“Hi”

He seemed almost shy as he stood in front of her.

“May I?” He asked, pointing to the end of the couch.

“Yes.” She nodded, and he sat down, carefully lifting her legs. He could hear her taking in a breath as his fingers touched her skin.

“What are you doing here?”

Judy still couldn’t quite believe that he came. Not after everything she said to him in a fit of rage about a week ago now. She had been so angry with him because they hardly saw each other these last couple of months. She knew he had a lot going on with work and making time for his daughter as he tried to please everyone at the same time. But after he cancelled on her again she just lost it, and he did, too.

“I couldn’t spend another day like this.”

Judy couldn’t tell if he was even aware that he was doing it, but the way his fingers softly circled her ankle and gently massaged her feet made her feel so good that she allowed herself to just enjoy it.

“Me neither.” She admitted silently.

“Can you forgive me? I’m sorry that I wasn’t there when you needed me.”

Judy could only nod, trying to stifle a sob as her tears welled over.

“Oh baby.”

He got up and knelt down right next to her, so he could fold her in his arms, covering her face with kisses, telling her he was sorry as he tried to get her to calm down. Taking her face in his hands he leaned in and kissed her deeply.

“I’m sorry, too. I know you were really busy and wanted to make time for Kerry.”

“Shh, don’t be.” He answered.

Judy rested her forehead against his, all of a sudden feeling completely relaxed.

“Wanna spend the day together?” He asked, making her smile.

“Well, seems like you’re in luck, Vincente just told me he was about to leave.”

“Yes, I know, I talked to him. That’s why he won’t be here. He left when I got here.”

Judy opened her mouth in mock shock.

“You had this all planned out?”

“Sorta.”

“Good thing that I forgave you then.” She teased him before she leaned in for another kiss.

Leaning her head back against the pillows Judy let out a content sigh.

“So what do you wanna do?”

He asked, as he sat down next to her.

“Do? … Na-ah, darling I’m not gonna do anything, or else I’ll die from this heat.”

Taking her hand he tugged on it gently.

“Come on, let’s go outside at least.”

“Were you even listening to me?”

“It’s much warmer in here than outside in the shade.” He pointed out, tilting his head slightly as he smiled at her amused. “Come on.” He said, holding out his hand to her.

“You’re not gonna let this go, are you?”

“Nope.” He said as he shook his head.

“Ugh, okay then.” She agreed reluctantly as she placed her hand in his waiting for him to help her get up.

As she lay in one of the deck chairs that Gene had pulled into the shade, she hated to admit that he was right. This really was better. But not just because it was less hot. His presence lightened her mood as well. They spend the whole afternoon together and Judy loved listening to him as he told her about work and filled her in about the latest things going on at the studio. It seemed like they never had trouble finding something to talk about and everything he said was interesting to her but most importantly he could make her laugh like no other. When he felt her getting tired he lay down next to her, so she could get comfortable against him. As he kissed her over and over again she dozed off for a while.  
When the evening came around Vincente still hadn’t returned yet. Judy had the housekeeper prepare some sandwiches for dinner as she couldn’t stand warm meals at the moment. As they sat down together to eat, Judy noticed the way he watched her in amusement.

“What?” She hissed.

“Nothing.” He chuckled, as he diverted his eyes.

Reaching for her hand he placed a kiss against the back of it.

“Another one?” He asked surprised when she reached for her fourth sandwich.

“Your point being?”

“I don’t know.” He said, shrugging his shoulders. “Doesn’t seem like you.”

“Ya well, what can I say, this is definitely your child.” She retorted, making him laugh out loud.

When they were done Judy took him back outside. Sitting down at the edge of the pool they watched the sunset together as their legs dangled in the cool water. Gene sat behind her, letting his hands rest on her belly while she leaned against his chest.

“This has been the best day.”

“I’m glad.” He said, bending his head to place soft kisses against her neck, making her sigh.

All of a sudden she felt him all tense as he tightened his arms around her. Moving her hands over his she asked him,

“You okay?”

“Yes.” He answered, but she could hear his voice slightly faltering.

“Please tell me.” Judy tried again.

“I don’t want to leave you, I hate this.”

“Then don’t … stay here.”

“You know I wouldn’t do that Judy.”

“But I don’t want you to leave either.”

“No, Judy, not with your husband in the same house, in his house for that matter.”

“What difference does it make? I don’t see him like that anymore.”

Gene took in a deep breath.

“He still is, though. I couldn’t do that.”

Judy didn’t know what to reply. His voice sounded so sad. As if he finally realized that it would still take quite some time before he could stay with her every night.

“Alright then don’t.” She sighed, and turned her head around to look at him. “But listen to me. I know this is not how either of us imagined it to be. But I also know there’ll be other times. He’s not gonna be my husband forever. As soon as I can, I’ll get out. He knows that, too. We both agreed on it months ago. So suck it up, will you? We’re all doing the best we can here.”

Her voice was so determined that he couldn’t help but smile to himself.

“Aye-aye.”

“Don’t you start teasing me, or I’ll push you in.”

“I better be quiet then.” He answered, making her giggled.

Judy lost all sense of time as she leaned back against him while he started caressing her body as his lips gently moved over her temple, down to her cheek, placing soft kisses against it. She never wanted to get up again, but the pressure on her bladder started to become unbearable and seeing the large pool in front of her didn’t help either.

“Gene, I need to get up.”

“Why, what is it?” He asked in a frantic voice.

“It’s just … I really need to go to the bathroom.” She said, almost whispering.

“Oh, okay.” He answered a little relieved.

Gene got up and held out his hand to her.

“I need a little more help than that.” She mumbled, making him laugh.

Bending down he placed one arm under her thighs as he brought the other around her back before he lifted her as though she only weighed ten pounds.

“And how were you going to push me in if you can’t even get up yourself.”

“Oh God, shut your stupid face.” Judy replied annoyed.

“Okay.” He grinned before he pressed his lips against hers, kissing her so deeply, she forgot what she wanted to do.

He didn’t want to let go off her and carried her all the way back to the porch. They saw light shining through the windows of the hall, both of them knew they didn’t turn it on. Gene let her down quietly.

“I guess I should get going.”

“Please wait till I get back, I don’t wanna say goodbye to you this.” She told him, bouncing up and down a little.

“Alright.” He chuckled before she quickly got inside.

Gene waited a while before he followed her. The least thing he wanted to do now was being forced to make small talk with Vincente. They had several conversations about the whole situation and given the circumstances they got along well, but Gene had the sense that this would make both of them uncomfortable. After a couple of minutes, he ventured inside, but Judy still wasn’t back. Walking up and down the hall he hoped that she would return soon. After a while he started to get worried.

“Ah, Gene.”

He heard Vincente’s voice as he turned around the corner, causing Gene to flinch a little.

“Hey, I was just on my way out.”

He scrutinized him a little but ignored what he said.

“Where’s Judy?”

“She should be right back. She just went to the bathroom.”

“Was everything okay with her?”

Gene didn’t like the tone he was giving him, sounding like a small part of him still didn’t fully trust him and still didn’t want to let go of her completely. Gene understood to an extent, but knowing that the future of his family also depended on him in a way, at least for now, frustrated him immensely. He was used to taking care of things by himself, so the thought of being forced to leave his baby with him in just a couple of weeks without being able to do anything about it almost made him sick.

“Of course.” He answered, forcing himself to smile.

“Good. Seems like you two had a pretty bad fight. Judy hasn’t been herself these last few days.”

Gene had to concentrate to stay in control of his emotions.

“I’d rather not discuss this. It’s all good now. She’s fine.”

Vincente didn’t miss his tone but just as he wanted to retort something, a door at the end of the hall opened, causing both men to turn their heads.

“Gene?”

Gene was already on his way to her before Vincente had the chance to react.

“What is it?” He asked as he reached for her hands.

“My water broke.” She replied, her voice slightly shaky.

“What?” He almost shouted, feeling like his heart dropped into his stomach.

He didn’t even notice that Vincente had followed him and was now standing right beside him.

“Are you certain?” Vincente asked her.

“Of course I am.” Judy snapped at him. “Don’t you think I can tell the difference between pee and a giant gush of water shooting out of me?”

“Alright, alright. Are you having contractions?”

“No, not yet, but just get the damn bag, will ya? We need to leave.”

Vincente turned around without another word and immediately hurried up the stairs.

Gene just looked at her, still absolutely baffled.

“It’s too early … there are still three weeks left.”

“Well, our baby certainly doesn’t seem to think so, darling.” She smiled at him, bringing him back to his senses.

“Oh, honey.”

As Gene brought his hands up to her face, tears started to fill his eyes.

“Don’t worry about us, alright? It’s gonna be okay.” She whispered against his lips, sounding so calm that it surprised him.

“How are you so calm?”

“Well, one of us has to be.”

Gene could hear Vincente walking down the stairs, but he didn’t give a shit about anything anymore. Leaning in he kissed her, over and over again as he didn’t want to part from her. Judy could feel the desperation in his kisses. She knew exactly what he wanted to do. She wanted him there, too, but there was no way. Feeling like she needed to be strong for both of them now, she eventually parted from his lips. Looking up at him she tried giving him a brave smile.

“Are you coming, Judy?” They heard Vincente call from the doorway.

“I’ll call you okay?” She whispered.

Gene could only nod and let her go.

“Let yourself out Gene, will you?” He heard Vincente say before the door fell into the lock behind them.

Gene almost broke down right there in the hall. Knowing that he wouldn’t be with her when their baby was born was enough to tear him apart. When Betsy had Kerry he didn’t leave her side and even went into the delivery room with her. It made him feel like such a failure. He contemplated following her to the hospital for a moment but quickly discarded the idea. It appeared as though there would be nothing left for him to do than to just go home.

After a few deep breaths Gene was calm enough to get out of the empty house and back to his car. He could still hardly concentrate on the road though and was glad when he returned home safely. But there the torment only continued. He couldn’t sit still and not a second went by where he didn’t think about them. After a couple more minutes he reached for the phone. He was just about to hang up and dial the number again when he finally picked up.

“Hello?”

“Frank”

“Hey, Gene, how can I help?” He asked in a cheerful voice, obviously a little boozed up.

“Judy …” It was all he managed to get out.

“Is she okay?” Frank asked, suddenly sounding completely sober and almost frantic.

“Yes, well I hope so … she’s at the hospital. It’s time.”

“I’ll be right over.” He simply said, before he hung up.

Gene could only hope that Frank knew he called him from home. The last thing he needed right now was a half drunk Frank barging into the hospital and jumble everything up as he was looking for him. Gene felt a tinge of relief set in, hoping that his friend would be there soon. He was one of the very few people who knew the truth.

Only about ten minutes later Gene noticed the light of his car as he parked on the driveway, causing him to rush to the door.

“At least someone is excited to see me.” Frank said as he walked up to the door.

“What?”

“Let’s just say Nancy wasn’t sad that I left … Said I should go to hell.”

“Well, I’m glad you came here then.” Gene said, trying a slight smile before he let him in.

“Yeah, it’s slightly better than hell … I brought you these.” Frank said as he held up a couple of beers. “Thought you could use some booze.”

“Thank you man, but I don’t think I’ll get anything down right now.”

“Need something stronger?”

“The thing I need isn’t here.” Gene said, trying to keep it together as he turned away from Frank and walked into the living room before he sank onto the couch.

Frank followed him. They sat next to each other in silence for a few minutes, but after a while Frank picked up the conversation, in the hope that he could distract him a bit. It helped a little. But as time passed Gene got anxious again and kept looking at his watch. It was almost 1 am now, almost five hours after Judy had left for the hospital.

“Would you keep your feet still for just one moment? It’s driving me insane.” Frank said, tossing the empty beer bottle in his hand from side to side.

“I’ll try.” He murmured, but only stopped for a moment.

“She will call.”

“I just hope it’s soon.” Gene let out a deep sigh as he leaned back against the cushions, burying his face in his hands. “I hate this so much.” He admitted.

“I know.” Frank said, knowing that he wasn’t just talking about tonight.

“I should be in the hospital with her … and bring them home. I can’t even have a room for the baby because no one can know that I’m the father. I already don’t see Kerry as much as I want to, but at least everyone knows that she’s mine … And I don’t want Vincente to take over.”

“He told you he wouldn’t.”

“It doesn’t matter what he said … They’re all living together. It’s going to happen sooner or later.”

“But it won’t be like this forever Gene.”

“No. Definitely not … Betsy and I filed for divorce.”

Frank’s eyes widened as he looked at him.

“So it’s official now.”

“Mm hm.”

“Are you gonna ask her to marry you?”

“No. Not while she’s still with him. And I don’t want her to think that I’m doing it just because she’s having the baby. I just wanted to take care of this as soon as possible, so everything is settled. It’s still gonna take a while anyway.”

“You really love her don’t you.”

“More than my life.” Gene admitted.

“Good, ‘cause she’s more special than anyone that girl.”

“I know.” He said, smiling.

“I still can’t believe she chose you, though.” Frank mocked him.

Gene grabbed a pillow from behind him and threw it in his face, making him laugh.

“Glad I could cheer you up.”

“Little bit.”

“It’s gonna be fine buddy, trust me.”

“I sure hope you’re right.”

Gene reached forward, wanting to take one of the beers when the phone started ringing. He expected to jump right up when it would, but instead it felt as though he was glued to the sofa.

“Well, aren’t you gonna get that?” Frank asked with a quizzical look on his face, getting him out of his trance.

He practically sprinted to the phone, picking it up right at the last moment.

“Judy?”

“One second longer, and I would have hung up.” Her voice was sleepy, but he could hear her smiling.

“Honey … is everything - are you okay?”

“More than that.”

“Did everything go okay?”

“Yes, I just woke up like half an hour ago ... She’s perfect.”

“What?”

“You were right darling.”

“We have our Ella?” He asked in disbelief. They’d picked out her name months ago, and it was the only one they could agree on. When it came to boy names it was just a complete disaster. Seemed like it was meant to be.

“Mm hm.” She said, and he could hear her starting to cry.

“Oh babe.” He breathed. He would have been happy with either, but part of him had secretly hoped for a girl.

“She’s sleeping right now … listen, she makes the sweetest noise.”

And before Gene could answer something Judy had already taken the receiver and held it towards the baby’s face. Listening to the steady breathing and the soft gurgles and grunts of his daughter made his eyes fill up with tears.

“If she enjoys sleep as much as you do, I’ll be very happy.” Judy giggled as she picked up the receiver again.

“I wish I could be with you two.”

Suddenly he noticed Frank walking around the corner, mouthing something at him.

“I would love nothing more … but I’ll be out soon. I can’t wait.”

“Me neither … sorry honey, Frank is being a pain in the ass. What do you want?”

Before he could do something about it Frank had already ripped the receiver out of his hand.

“Congratulations sweetheart, I’m so happy for you.”

“Thank you darling.” She giggled. “Hope you’re taking good care of him.”

“Sure am … It was exhausting, though. He wasn’t in the mood for anything fun. But there won’t be any excuses now. We gotta drink to this.”

“You do that.”

“I guess I better hand you over to Gene again. I wanna get out of here alive.”

Gene could hear her laughing. 

“Alright, bye bye darling, see you soon.”

Before Frank could say his goodbye Gene had already reclaimed the receiver.

“Sorry bout that.”

“No, I’m glad he’s there with you. Have fun.” She said followed by a big yawn.

“Tired?”

“Oh, don’t get me started … Vincente said he would call you and that I should get some rest, but I insisted.”

“Thank you darling.”

“We’re gonna try and sleep now alright?

“Sure.”

“I’ll call you to let you know when I’ll be home.”

“Please do. And give her a kiss from me.”

“I already did.” She said in a soft voice. “At least a hundred.”

“Sleep well you two, I love you.”

“We love you, too. Bye bye.”

He hung up the phone with a huge smile on his face and turned back around to his friend, who embraced him in a warm hug.

“Get those glasses out, buddy. We’re gonna celebrate.”

______________

Gene took in a deep breath as he saw Vincente already standing there, watching him as he walked up to the front door. But it didn’t matter. Today he would take anything.

“Gene” Vincente nodded and Gene gave him a firm handshake before he followed him inside.

“How is she?” He asked when they were standing in the hallway.

“Still asleep. I guess she thought you wouldn’t get here before noon.”

“I didn’t want to wait anymore.”

“I understand.” Vincente replied, a slight smile on his lips. “Come.” He said as he gestured for Gene to follow him upstairs. Gene felt his heartbeat quickening with every step. He still couldn’t quite believe that he was about to meet his daughter. Vincente led him down the corridor before he stopped in front of a door next to Judy’s bedroom.

“Well, here we are.”

Taking in a deep breath he turned around to Gene.

“Look Gene, I know we already talked about this a few times, and I stand by my word. I’ll do anything I can, but try to interfere as little as possible. She’s yours and I know that. I just hope we can make this work … for Judy, and our families.”

“Thank you, Vince. I appreciate it.”

Vincente nodded in acknowledgement.

“She should be still napping, but I suppose it won’t be long now before she wakes up. I’ll take Liza out to the park now, so you three can have some time together. Stay as long as you want, though. I don’t want you to feel pressured to leave.”

“Alright.”

“Goodbye then.” Vincente said and stepped away but turned around to him again, seeming like he forgot to say something. “She’s absolutely beautiful.”

Gene couldn’t help but smile and took in a deep breath before he carefully opened the door to the nursery. The room was dimply lit from the small ray of sunshine that crept through the gap in the curtains. But when Gene reached the crib he saw that it was empty.  
Turning around on his heels he noticed the door that led to Judy’s room, and opened it carefully.

“Get in here already.” Gene heard her say just as he'd opened the door wide enough to peek through.

“Vincente said you were still asleep.” He explained as he stepped into the room.

Judy was sitting in bed, the covers draped over her lower body as their daughter was lying in her arms.

“Yeah, he probably didn’t notice. He was getting Liza ready to go out. I got up when she started to cry.” She said as she patted the baby’s tummy. “Turns out she does more than sleep after all.” She giggled.

Gene seemed absolutely transfixed as he walked over to her.

“Come here.” She said, smiling at him.

After he’d kicked off his shoes he got onto the bed next to her. Judy bent over a little and leaned in to kiss him. Before he could react she’d already placed the baby in his arms and cuddled against his side, watching his reactions. Gene was mesmerized by her. Everything about her was beautiful and as her big eyes, already tinged in a dark shade of brown, looked up at him and her tiny hand grabbed his finger, Gene leaned forward to place kisses against her rosy cheek.  
“She’s so perfect.” He said, his voice slightly faltering.

He was usually so tough and collected, but Judy loved this vulnerable side about him even more. She tugged on his arm a bit, so he would lift it and cuddled closer against him.

“She’s all content now, but don’t be fooled, she can be as loud as me.”

“Good.” Gene chuckled. “She also looks exactly like you.”

“Everyone says so.”

“It’s true.” He said before he kissed her forehead.

“Gene?”

“Hm?” He hummed as he changed positions and brought Ella up against his chest, as she started to get fussy.

“Would you do me a favor?”

“Anything.”

“Please stay with us today … and tonight.” Judy said, her voice all serious.

Leaning over, Gene cupped her cheek in his free hand before he kissed her deeply.

“I was just gonna ask.”

______________

Epilogue

June 1950

Judy could hear the faint melody of a swing tune coming from the house and started humming along. She lay in one of the loungers that faced the pool, watching the clouds roll by, tinged in a soft pink hue, as she waited for Gene to get ready, so they could go out to dinner. He was taking forever, but she was too happy and relaxed to get annoyed. For the first time in a long time, it felt like everything was as it should be.  
After Gene and her finished their last picture together, she was let go from the studio. At last. After finishing In The Good Old Summertime her mind was set that she wanted out. She had fun filming the picture and Van had been a sweetheart, but she needed a longer break and most of all she wanted something new and to be able to decide for herself how her schedule would look like. She needed this freedom for her and her family. Mr. Mayer didn’t want to listen to any of it, though. He was determined to make her stay, but after countless meetings he realized that she wouldn’t cave. In the end they agreed on her ultimatum: One last film, and after that, she would be done. Without any further discussion.

A couple of months ago Gene and her finally moved in together, and it was such a relief. It seemed like the appropriate time since she and Vincente had filed for divorce, and he had divorced Betsy almost a year prior. Judy knew how hard these last two years had been for Gene, not being able to spend as much time with his daughter as he wanted to, so watching them together every day now overjoyed her. Fortunately Vincente agreed that Liza should move in with them. He knew that while Gene got along great with her, he would never try to take his place. Exactly how he hadn’t tried to take his when it came to Ella. Judy didn’t know what she would’ve done if he’d put up a fight. She wouldn’t have been able to cope any other way. She needed both her daughters with her, and they needed each other. Ella loved Liza and Liza just adored her little sister. Disagreements between them were very rare. It was also lovely to see how their bond with Kerry strengthened now that she was staying over at their new house frequently.

Gene had surprised her with this getaway for her birthday that was only a couple of days away now and after they’d spent their first night here, she already knew that it was the best gift he could have given her. They couldn’t get enough of each other last night and the thought of it alone was enough to make her blush and her body tingle all over. They hadn’t been able to be this uninhibited in a long time and she’d missed it like nothing else. 

After a couple more minutes she heard footsteps behind her, and closed her eyes, smiling to herself. When she felt him place his knee on the edge of the lounger and lean over her, she couldn’t help but giggle.

“Still tired?”

“Can you blame me, after last night?”

Gene laughed before he leaned down, placing kisses against her prominent cleavage.

“Well, we better sleep this night then.”

“No way.” Judy hummed, as he gently sucked on the swell of her breasts. She needed to stop this, she thought. Placing her hands on his chest, she meant to push him away, so they could get up, but he ignored her and pushed her back down as his lips pressed against hers. Gene kissed her so deeply she forgot what she wanted to do.

“So, shall we?” He asked, seemingly unimpressed, after he’d parted from her lips. But Judy could feel that their kiss had aroused him just the same, and she reached down between them to cup his building erection that was already straining against his pants, making him grin.

“We better, I definitely need to get something to eat before we do this again.”

“Sounds like a plan.” Gene said, smiling at her and got up before he held out his hand to her.

“Alright, let’s go.”

“Wait.” He said, and took hold of her hand.

“What? Don’t you think you’ve kept me waiting long enough already? I’m starving.”

“Yes, I have.” He murmured with a strange smile on his lips, that she couldn’t quite place. “Just wait here, I’ll be right back. Promise.”

Judy let out a frustrated groan as she sat down again and watched him run back into the house. He returned only a few minutes later, carrying something in his hands.

“This was meant to be for your birthday … but I think it would go beautifully with the dress you’re wearing.”

Judy stood up, accepting the flat box that he held out to her.

“I hope it wasn’t too expensive.” Judy said smiling at him, as her hands slid over the soft velvety material.

Gene just waved it off. Judging by the shape and size of the case Judy expected to find a necklace when she opened it, but its content would have fitted into the tiniest box. Judy gasped when she saw the ring. Its diamond was relatively large but still delicate enough that it didn’t look tacky, and it was surrounded by small pearls. It was gorgeous.

Gene smiled to himself when he saw her stare at the ring and took the box gently out of her hands before he took out the ring. When he got down on one knee in front of her and reached for her hands the tears she’d tried to hold in just welled over.

“Oh God.” She breathed as she brought her hand up to her mouth, trying to stifle a nervous giggle.

“Look at me, baby.” Gene whispered and kissed the back of her hand.

When he had her attention he went on.

“I meant to do this a long time ago. But the timing felt never right. Back when we had our girl we were both still married and I also didn’t want you to think that I asked just because we were having a baby together. You’re so much more than just the mother of my child for me, Judy. When we started working together …” He shook his head as though he forgot something. “No even before that … ever since our first date I knew that there was something about you, I would never be able to forget.”

“So you did think it was a date … cause when we met each other again right after you came to Hollywood you acted as though there was nothing going on between us, and I just could not believe it, I-”

“Baby.” He said, stroking her hands to interrupt her chatter that seemed to speed up with every word.

“Right … go ahead.” She cooed, smiling at him.

“You can drive me absolutely mad, but I know that at the end of the day there’s no one I’d rather have cursing at me and throwing things after me than you. And I know that I deserve it sometimes.”

“You do.” She mumbled to herself, causing him to chuckle before he continued.

“You’re my best friend and I wouldn’t change a thing about you. I’ve loved you every day I’ve known you and I promise that I’m going to love you every day that follows … Please, marry me, Judy.”

“Mm hm.” Judy nodded through her tears.

“Yes?”

“Yes.” She answered and let him slide the ring onto her finger before she practically leapt into his arms.

He tumbled a little but held her close, cupping her bottom as she wrapped her legs around him and leaned her forehead against his. They were both crying now.

“Remember, finders’ keepers.” He started singing to her as he softly swayed from side to side.

“Loosers weepers” She joined him, smiling to herself.

“And because it’s true, you're mine now, you wonderful you.”

“I love you.” She whispered against his lips, her eyes still filled with happy tears, before she leaned in and kissed him.

The End


End file.
